Top Gear

[Pancake]

back on Fathers Day 21st June... same as the British GP.

Looking like an ace ****ing day if I can get a BBQ in there as well.

[JustMike]

woo hoo :-) about bloody time too!

[Patrick Bateman]

back on Fathers Day 21st June... same as the British GP.

Looking like an ace ****ing day if I can get a BBQ in there as well.

This is wonderful news - thanks for making my otherwise rubbish (so far) working day cheery!

[St Landrew]

I understand one of the features is a race up country, London to Edinburgh by rail and road. IIRC, Clarkson will be on the footplate of the brand new A1 Peppercorn Class Pacific, called Tornado [because he actually loves steam locomotives though he wouldn't admit it]

http://www.a1steam.com/
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hoL9Jkvwc3A

Hamster will be on a Vincent Motorcycle, and May is in an old Jaguar. Apparently, and as usual, it was a close run thing.

[Colinjb]

Outstanding. Bring on the entertainment.

[Bexy]

I understand one of the features is a race up country, London to Edinburgh by rail and road. IIRC, Clarkson will be on the footplate of the brand new A1 Peppercorn Class Pacific, called Tornado

http://www.a1steam.com/

Hamster will be on a Vincent Motorcycle, and May is in an old Jaguar. Apparently, and as usual, [B]it was a close run thing.

How weird. :p

As much as I enjoy watching their races, it's so obvious that they are staged.

[Patrick Bateman]

How weird. :p

As much as I enjoy watching their races, it's so obvious that they are staged.

Well that goes without saying, but consider that a fair amount of research will go in to make sure they ARE fairly close in the first instance.

[mehball]

MOD'S EDIT: *** Spoiler Alert ***


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JKRNKaqxru4&feature=related

[Pancake]

They also filmed some bits at Canary Wharf back in April. I would guess from the location and cars that it was some kind of "Cars for Credit crunched Bankers"

http://www.flickr.com/search/?q=canary%20wharf%20top%20gear&w=all

[Weston Super Saint]

Should be a good day then.

F4SA in Plymouth all weekend, then back in time for Top Gear and Father's day presents.

The only down side being having to close the pub down that night :(

[lee_saint]

I liked todays episode, had to laugh at Scum-macher being the Stig. Also, Clarkson was ****ed at the end of that train journey!

[SNSUN]

Bet that hotel was ****ed at the state of their walls.

Schumacher isn't the real Stig anyway, he was there because the ferrari fxx raced for it's lap time belongs to him. Ergo he raced his own car, just dressed as the Stig.

[Colinjb]

Really enjoyed that, would love to know if Hammond made it.

The whole Schumacher thing was a little embarrasing though, of course it was going to be a convenient stunt like that.

[St Landrew]

Really enjoyed that, would love to know if Hammond made it.

The whole Schumacher thing was a little embarrasing though, of course it was going to be a convenient stunt like that.

He did. There are photos to prove it. Just Google for them, as I can't remember the link. I think it's on the A1 Tornado Steam Train website.

[saint_stevo]

so.....was MS the stig all along then?

[Baj]

so.....was MS the stig all along then?

Is this a joke? If not, of course not.

[Hatch]

The fact that Schumacher beat the best lap time by 7 seconds makes the real Stig look a bit of an idiot.

[Pancake]

The fact that Schumacher beat the best lap time by 7 seconds makes the real Stig look a bit of an idiot.

Best lap was in a Renault F1. 59 seconds I believe. ;)

[Alanh]

So does the FXX qualify for the power lap? It didsn't look like the nose would go over a speed bump, which is their qualifying criteria. Mighty quick car though.

[Pancake]

So does the FXX qualify for the power lap? It didsn't look like the nose would go over a speed bump, which is their qualifying criteria. Mighty quick car though.

My money is on next week they take it off due to it being ineligible and the fact they were "duped" into having someone other than the Stig race it. Maybe...

[saint_stevo]

Is this a joke? If not, of course not.

It wasn't. i missed Top Gear last night, and everyone keeps telling me MS was/is the (white suited) stig

[scott_saints]

I didn't see Top Gear last night, but people told me MS was revealed as the stig.

I laughed at them for believing it.

[Hatch]

It was clearly going to be a joke, I didn't think it would be Schuey though.
I thought it would be Clarksons mum or something.

Plus, MS is really small.

[lee_saint]

Of course we knew it was going to be a joke, Clarkson hinted at that in his newspaper article. I'm glad that Clarkson didn't win one of the races for once though and I'm glad he was made to work too!

[JustMike]

awesome episode, glad its back, and judging by the little preview of this series clip they played at the start, looks like its going to be a good series :-)

[Pancake]

awesome episode, glad its back, and judging by the little preview of this series clip they played at the start, looks like its going to be a good series :-)

Veyron Vs Lambo Murci SV Vs McLaren F1 at some point by the looks of it... *licks lips*

[Johnny Bognor]

So does the FXX qualify for the power lap? It didsn't look like the nose would go over a speed bump, which is their qualifying criteria. Mighty quick car though.


It's not road legal.

When buying them from Ferrari, you can only use them on track days with Ferrari pit crews.

Therefore, the lap time shouldn't count IMO.

I would be interested to see schumi go round in the next quickest car on the board to see how much is down to the man and how much is down to the machine.

[Ponty]

I can answer that. It's 75% the machine and 25% the man, assuming both are capable drivers. Even Fisichella managed a couple of wins during Alonso's championship years. I'd expect Schumi to beat most people in the Fxx with the possible exception of Marc Gene, who spends his entire working week pounding round the Ferrari test track fine tuning their exotica.

[Alanh]

It's not road legal.

When buying them from Ferrari, you can only use them on track days with Ferrari pit crews.

Therefore, the lap time shouldn't count IMO.

I would be interested to see schumi go round in the next quickest car on the board to see how much is down to the man and how much is down to the machine.

I thought there would be a problem with it's legality for the Power lap time, it will be interesting to see if they remove it from the top of the board next week. The FXX has been around for a while so I was surprised they hadn't had on on there before. I guess it was part of the deal for getting MS on the show. Shame he didn't really have a go in the reasonabley priced car (Liana?) to see how he compared to the other racing drivers who have done a lap in it.

[Johnny Bognor]

I thought there would be a problem with it's legality for the Power lap time, it will be interesting to see if they remove it from the top of the board next week. The FXX has been around for a while so I was surprised they hadn't had on on there before. I guess it was part of the deal for getting MS on the show. Shame he didn't really have a go in the reasonabley priced car (Liana?) to see how he compared to the other racing drivers who have done a lap in it.

I have a feeling in my waters that Schumi is going to do a few runs at this year's Festival of Speed and that is why he is here.

[Baj]

I thought there would be a problem with it's legality for the Power lap time, it will be interesting to see if they remove it from the top of the board next week. The FXX has been around for a while so I was surprised they hadn't had on on there before. I guess it was part of the deal for getting MS on the show. Shame he didn't really have a go in the reasonabley priced car (Liana?) to see how he compared to the other racing drivers who have done a lap in it.
If he did, there's no way they would use up the schumy exclusive all in one show, they would show that on another episode

[Nexstar]

Does Schumacher not test drive Ferrari's? Therefore the only way Top Gear could get the new ferrari on the show was by having Schumacher drive it round the track, as they weren't going to let just anybody drive a £1,000,000 car.

[Pancake]

Does Schumacher not test drive Ferrari's? Therefore the only way Top Gear could get the new ferrari on the show was by having Schumacher drive it round the track, as they weren't going to let just anybody drive a £1,000,000 car.

It was MS's own Fxx. As Ferrari only let you drive "your" Fxx where and when they say, they would only allow TG to put it round their track if MS did it.

[Arizona]

Haven't seen it yet, will have to watch the repeat tomorrow night. Saw a clip of Schumi dressed as the stig. Cringeworthy piece of television. They should have just had him in the Fxx as himself, interviewed him, then stuck him in a Liana.

And get Coulthard and Brundle in the Liana too, now they work for the Beeb.

[Sidney Fudpucker the 3rd]

Utter ****e. Just how many times can they churn out the same old gags? Oh look, James May's left his car unattended, let's vandalise it. Oh Jeremy you're so funny.

Idea for new TV show... Jeremy Clarkson flies the worlds most unreliable Aircraft.

[Baj]

Utter ****e. Just how many times can they churn out the same old gags? Oh look, James May's left his car unattended, let's vandalise it. Oh Jeremy you're so funny.

Idea for new TV show... Jeremy Clarkson flies the worlds most unreliable Aircraft.

Deffo starting to wear thin, im really enjoying the current series of Fifth Gear

[Arizona]

It's a bit love hate with me and Top Gear. Some of the stuff they do is the best television I have ever seen.

Trying to send the Reliant Robin into space
The road trips accross the Deep South and Botswana
Racing the Veyron and the Typhoon
The races to Oslo, Monte Carlo, The Alpine ski resort, across London and from Turin to London.
Sabine Schmitt driving the van around the Nurburg.
The 24 hour race at Silverstone.
The Hamster's ill fated rocket car attempt.
The F1 drivers in the reasonably priced car.

All of it fantastic television, but it's ruined at times by stunts which are blatently staged, childish humour and terrible acting. Sketches like the caravan holiday were just very poor slapstick.

I'd like to see power laps board for novelty vehicles. They've already had the Sea Harrier and Renault F1. How about more like that. A combine harvester, a milk float, a hearse, a hovercraft, a tractor, etc. It would be pointless, but quite entertaining IMO.

[Nineteen Canteen]

Utter ****e. Just how many times can they churn out the same old gags? Oh look, James May's left his car unattended, let's vandalise it. Oh Jeremy you're so funny.

Idea for new TV show... Jeremy Clarkson flies the worlds most unreliable Aircraft.

May is ok but Clarkson is busy eating himself and Hammond has moved into kids tv and that better suits his puerile sense of humour. May's recent programme celebrating the 40th anniversary of the moon landings was ten times more entertaining than the sh1te Top Gear churned out on Sunday. Bring back William Woollard as i wouldn't mind a programme about cars I could actually buy or even aspire to.

Now I must go and tell my teenage son to start saving for his Volvo Turbo estate or some obscure Hyundai coupe. Why can't worthy and informative be funny as well - James May can do it as his recent programmes has shown plus his wine tours with Oz Clarke. TG is repetitive, predictable and toe curlingly embarrassing at times with their staged events and faux acting.

[Pancake]

TG is repetitive, predictable and toe curlingly embarrassing at times with their staged events and faux acting.

When you say TG, you mean NC, yeah?

[Johnny Bognor]

Why can't worthy and informative be funny as well - James May can do it as his recent programmes has shown plus his wine tours with Oz Clarke. TG is repetitive, predictable and toe curlingly embarrassing at times with their staged events and faux acting.

May is a jumped up wannabee c-list celeb who can't take a joke. My company recently sponsored an event whereby he was doing the after dinner speech. His whole theme was taking the mick out of himself as the "other one from top gear" - on the basis that Clarkson and Hammond are better known.

After the event standing in the Hotel Foyer, I went up to James in a jovial way and said "excuse me, aren't you the other one off Top Gear"? - call it an ice breaker if you will. The look he gave me was as if I had exhumed his grandma and took her round the back of the cemetary. What a tosser, especially as it was his bloody joke in the first place. So, as I said, a jumped up wannabee celeb.

[JustMike]

Utter ****e. Just how many times can they churn out the same old gags? Oh look, James May's left his car unattended, let's vandalise it. Oh Jeremy you're so funny.

Idea for new TV show... Jeremy Clarkson flies the worlds most unreliable Aircraft.

dont watch it then!!

I like it just the way it is thank you very much

[JustMike]

May is ok but Clarkson is busy eating himself and Hammond has moved into kids tv and that better suits his puerile sense of humour. May's recent programme celebrating the 40th anniversary of the moon landings was ten times more entertaining than the sh1te Top Gear churned out on Sunday. Bring back William Woollard as i wouldn't mind a programme about cars I could actually buy or even aspire to.

Now I must go and tell my teenage son to start saving for his Volvo Turbo estate or some obscure Hyundai coupe. Why can't worthy and informative be funny as well - James May can do it as his recent programmes has shown plus his wine tours with Oz Clarke. TG is repetitive, predictable and toe curlingly embarrassing at times with their staged events and faux acting.

more carp from you i see NC, glad you dont just reserve it for the main board.

[Saint_Jonny]

I thought it was as brilliant as ever this week. Would have been good if hammond and clarkson bought typical young guy cars though, something small fast and french, you know, normal cars that young lads buy, would have made it more interesting. But still, nothing better on tv at the moment. Agree with NC though, that may program about the moon landing was entertaining and informative.

[Nineteen Canteen]

more carp from you i see NC, glad you dont just reserve it for the main board.

You're welcome because you are of course always right in your opinions and I understand that.

[Nineteen Canteen]

May is a jumped up wannabee c-list celeb who can't take a joke. My company recently sponsored an event whereby he was doing the after dinner speech. His whole theme was taking the mick out of himself as the "other one from top gear" - on the basis that Clarkson and Hammond are better known.

After the event standing in the Hotel Foyer, I went up to James in a jovial way and said "excuse me, aren't you the other one off Top Gear"? - call it an ice breaker if you will. The look he gave me was as if I had exhumed his grandma and took her round the back of the cemetary. What a tosser, especially as it was his bloody joke in the first place. So, as I said, a jumped up wannabee celeb.

Aren't all celebs the same or would you expect Johnny Depp to take you for a beer? Unsolicited ice breakers should be treated with the contempt they deserve.

[Nineteen Canteen]

When you say TG, you mean NC, yeah?

I expect you're right

[JustMike]

You're welcome because you are of course always right in your opinions and I understand that.

;)

not at all. Just dont understand why, if you dont like something, why watch it and then slag it off? Just to get a reaction?

[Saint_clark]

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=1304162912186494266

American roadtrip remains the best one i've ever seen, though the other two specials i've seen were awesome (Polar one and the one with Oliver, can't remember where that was).

[Johnny Bognor]

Aren't all celebs the same or would you expect Johnny Depp to take you for a beer? Unsolicited ice breakers should be treated with the contempt they deserve.

Not when my sponsorship is contributing towards his fee - the ungrateful saddo c-lister should show some ****ing respect.

Those that bite the hand that feeds them should be left to starve.

Although I can see why you like May, as your main main Lowe didn't give a **** about his paymasters either....and the rest is history.

[Saint_Jonny]

Not when my sponsorship is contributing towards his fee - the ungrateful saddo c-lister should show some ****ing respect.

Those that bite the hand that feeds them should be left to starve.

Although I can see why you like May, as your main main Lowe didn't give a **** about his paymasters either....and the rest is history.

If you did what father ted did to "victor Meldrew" (im ganna assume uve seen that episode) you would expect to get battered, you did the same thing to james may, what did you expect? Him to turn round with a massive smile on his face as if he'd never heard that **** one liner before? If you'd shaken his hand and introduced yourself like a normal human being maybe he'd have been more responsive.

[Nineteen Canteen]

Not when my sponsorship is contributing towards his fee - the ungrateful saddo c-lister should show some ****ing respect.

Those that bite the hand that feeds them should be left to starve.

Although I can see why you like May, as your main main Lowe didn't give a **** about his paymasters either....and the rest is history.

So you are upset because you believe you paid for May's undivided attention and he treated you with, by the sounds of it, justifiable contempt. He gave you an after dinner speech didn't he or was it in his contract to be paid to socialise with those who expected attention because they had 'paid' for him to provide another service.

Tradesmen must dread coming to your house to do a job and then expected to waste valuable time chatting with you as you have paid them. Do you pay for all your social interaction?

[Nineteen Canteen]

If you did what father ted did to "victor Meldrew" (im ganna assume uve seen that episode) you would expect to get battered, you did the same thing to james may, what did you expect? Him to turn round with a massive smile on his face as if he'd never heard that **** one liner before? If you'd shaken his hand and introduced yourself like a normal human being maybe he'd have been more responsive.

Exactly, May was being self deprecating in his speech not giving the wages clerk the opportunity to use his personal and original material as an insulting opening gambit.

[Johnny Bognor]

NC and JL - I'm not going to rise to the bait and get into further details as I can't be bothered and it's not relevant to the thread.

Clarkson made Top Gear what it was (and 'is' if you like the current format), whilst also-rans like May have thrived off the back of JC's fame and talent.

There are too many journalists-come-presenters on the show. For what it's worth, I preferred the previous format (circa 1988-late 1990's) when Tiff (a real driver) and Clarkson (the joker journalist) drove cars and reviewed them to decice which cars were best (in their respective classes). Sadly, the BBC have left the purist petrolheads behind and chased the popular TV audiences. You could call it dumbing down, which is typical of the BBC.

The later format is boring - how many times do you want to see a celebrity drive a crap car round an airfield? Honestly?

Anyway, I'm off to the Goodwood Festival of Speed.......

[St Landrew]

...but the Top Gear Reliant rocket was real fun, and it actually worked rather well.

[Nineteen Canteen]

NC and JL - I'm not going to rise to the bait and get into further details as I can't be bothered and it's not relevant to the thread.

Clarkson made Top Gear what it was (and 'is' if you like the current format), whilst also-rans like May have thrived off the back of JC's fame and talent.

There are too many journalists-come-presenters on the show. For what it's worth, I preferred the previous format (circa 1988-late 1990's) when Tiff (a real driver) and Clarkson (the joker journalist) drove cars and reviewed them to decice which cars were best (in their respective classes). Sadly, the BBC have left the purist petrolheads behind and chased the popular TV audiences. You could call it dumbing down, which is typical of the BBC.

The later format is boring - how many times do you want to see a celebrity drive a crap car round an airfield? Honestly?

Anyway, I'm off to the Goodwood Festival of Speed.......

I agree with you JB apart from your stance on May or that Clarkson made May because he has 'thrived off Clarkson's fame and talent'. Clarkson is a one trick pony and ready for the knackersyard. I seriously doubt Clarkson could pull off the number of entertaining and diverse documentaries that May as managed in his self-effacing way whereas Clarkson is now a bigger parody of his own bigoted self and frankly an embarrassment IMO.

[Johnny Bognor]

I agree with you JB apart from your stance on May or that Clarkson made May because he has 'thrived off Clarkson's fame and talent'. Clarkson is a one trick pony and ready for the knackersyard. I seriously doubt Clarkson could pull off the number of entertaining and diverse documentaries that May as managed in his self-effacing way whereas Clarkson is now a bigger parody of his own bigoted self and frankly an embarrassment IMO.

My thing with May is personal, so should not be on the forum, but he is still second rate though. Agree with you to some extent about Clarkson, but the World According to Clarkson is quite a funny read - he is what I call a joker journalist and when bearing that in mind, he is taken in the right context and is not that annoying.



...but the Top Gear Reliant rocket was real fun, and it actually worked rather well.

On the Tyre thread, there is an argument about what is the best performance tyre to use. Top Gear could do a feature on this. Would it be more interesting than watching some boring celeb drive a crap car around an airfield?

Probably, but instead they will try and put a Robin Reliant on the moon :rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:

[Sidney Fudpucker the 3rd]

;)

not at all. Just dont understand why, if you dont like something, why watch it and then slag it off? Just to get a reaction?

No. I watch it in the hope that it may improve and they might actually come up with something new, original and informative. Sadly that never seems to be the case.

[St Landrew]

I must admit there are times when I just wish Top Gear would return to being the motoring programme that it was when it was first broadcast many, many years ago. They don't even particularly open the bonnet anymore, and as for mpg figures and running costs, well forget it. However, that particular cat is out of the bag, and it won't go back in. A truly informative motoring programme is now almost impossible to do. Even Fifth Gear is really just a little bit too silly, despite the fact that they try to be informative. Top Gear has become the BBC's longest running joke, but the trouble is the producers manage to keep coming up with new ways to re-tell it and the presenters are obviously friends too, and have an great push-pull onscreen relationship. It's no surprise that the popularity hasn't really waned, since the first programmes of the different style came in, and the comic content gets bigger and bigger. It's kind of like Have I Got News For You/Mock The Week/Never Mind The Buzz****s... for the jokey motor enthusiatic public.

There really should be [Some..? More..?] motorbikes on it though, especially as May and Hammond own machines too; and JC should have to test one - and fall off. Now that would be a funny joke. ;)

[TopGun]

I'm not sure I could place my life in the hands of original topgear presenter Angela Rippon, but I'd be happy if called to the cause with Fiona Bruce. She should dump those silly BBC News and Crimewatch programmes. She'd be fab on Topgear. It would be no pants night for all blokes over 30 on Sunday night at 8pm.