Emigrating?

If I was able to turn back the clock, I would only consider going somewhere English-speaking. Learning a new lingo is hell as an adult. If I had to emigrate again now, I'd only go somewhere English- or German-speaking. Assuming you are not going to somewhere really Boer-ish that only speaks Afrikaans, this issue is not relevant for you.

As has already been said - "When in Rome...". Emigration is not for you if you want warm beer, fish 'n chips and "Kiss me Quick" hats. You are the visitor/guest to that country, its your job to fit in and your fault if you dont. "Not knowing" is no excuse in the eyes of the locals of the bureaucracy. You are emigrating from the UK, not to it. Again, back to the lingo, if you arent going to an English-speaking country, dont expect the local government bureaucracy to make allowances, and keep in mind other countries can have quirky laws...

Having said that, there is nothing wrong with the odd Red-Cross parcel of PG-Tips and Jelly Babies from a supportive family member or friend. You will have down moments, and they help to get through.

Go somewhere which lies in the Astra 2D footprint if you want to catch Eastenders or Corrie without the use of an antenna set-up to rival Jodrell Bank.

If the missus is a native (as in your case), it makes the upheaval and settling much easier, but be aware to the risk of overloading her or heaping everything on her shoulders.

You have to weigh up the pros and cons. However, it is a VERY violent country. I've worked with numerous South Africans, and they have all lost friends/relatives to either car accidents or violent crime. I met one guy in Dubai who had been carjacked 3 times, shot twice, mauled by a lion, and had a concrete block dropped on his head. The concrete block incident was the most serious because it is almost always fatal. Miraculously, he came to and staggered to a farmhouse, where he was set upon by the white farmer's dogs!! At the hospital his workers were queuing at his bedside to get their wages. A good friend of mine (who is of Greek heritage) told me a story of when his brother was kidnapped by redneck Afrikaners as they wanted to shoot him. They 'assumed' he was a man of the wrong colour until he told them he actually went to an Afrikaans school. On the flip side, you can have a very nice life there, but there is always that lingering doubt that something untoward might happen to you.

Is this everywhere or are the 'safe' areas?

Hmmm SA? Wonderful Country, so much to see and do IF you live long enough. The moment you get a nice set of wheels you'll become a target. The Country Manager where I used to work lived in a fortress yet was still car jacked at gunpoint twice and had two break-ins in one year.

General thoughts.

You will miss FAR more than you realise. It will take a long time to build a new circle of friends. At least in SA Or Aus you won't have a transient population like we do here. BUT from the moment you land you MUST try to get out, join any weird club you can, I joined a BSAC diving club and that helped me enourmously (only a couple of us left here now though) but Dining Clubs, enrol in some night classes. The first few months can be horrific.

Dubai is a City with no Soul, at least other places aren't like that and there is a higher percentage of genuine people you can meet. For me it is the Friends, it is the simple things in life that get missed.

You'll LOVE getting away from Z list Celebs, Political Bullsh1t, The Media, The Weather, Chavs & The Benefits Culture Classes

BUT, at the end of the day you'll HATE the fact it will cost you $1000 to go to watch a Saints game.

Just don't get your head blown off for $50 and a bag of shopping. IF you have doubts, just ask your wife how she would feel IF that happened to you...

It is really common in many parts of SA

Is this everywhere or are the 'safe' areas?

Cape Town is fine. You definitely won't be mauled by lions anyway

The baboons killed all the lions.