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Type: Posts; User: Whitey Grandad

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    Restaurant tables that don't sit flat on the...

    Restaurant tables that don't sit flat on the floor and have to be wedged with beer mats.
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    That's not what I typed! (and I did check at the...

    That's not what I typed! (and I did check at the time)

    Add auto-correct to the list of small things that annoy me.
  3. Any idea when that would be?

    Any idea when that would be?
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    A pedantic never sleeps. Do we?

    A pedantic never sleeps.


    Do we?
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    People who say "should of", "could of", "must of"...

    People who say "should of", "could of", "must of" etc


    People who say "etc" because they're too lazy to think of another example.
  6. What a carve up. What kind of democracy is this...

    What a carve up. What kind of democracy is this supposed to be?
  7. The WA is much deeper and wider than a simple FTA.

    The WA is much deeper and wider than a simple FTA.
  8. The WA is an indefinite extension except that...

    The WA is an indefinite extension except that legally we are out of the EU.

    Brexiteers say "that's tantamount to remaining'

    Remainers say 'in that case we might as well remain'
  9. You voted for the fudge. All you did was put a...

    You voted for the fudge. All you did was put a tick in a box, you didn't specify what you wanted.
  10. He doesn't have to do anything to get a no-deal....

    He doesn't have to do anything to get a no-deal. It is the default event and the only things that can stop it is ratifying the WA, revocation or him asking for an extension and the latter two are...
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    Stuttering is legal but encroachment isn’t and...

    Stuttering is legal but encroachment isn’t and from what I’ve heard there was quite a bit of that,
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    People on the radio who use that irritating...

    People on the radio who use that irritating uptalk? You know, the way of speaking that’s really annoying? It makes every sentence sound like a question? It's usually young women who do it? But not...
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    Remarkable, but hot actually legal :)

    Remarkable, but hot actually legal :)
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    My thoughts exactly. I have often wondered...

    My thoughts exactly.

    I have often wondered wat the maximum score could be in practical terms. It takes quite a bit of time to run up half the pitch, score, bring the ball back and wait for the...
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    Google search results that don't include one of...

    Google search results that don't include one of the words that you typed.

    There's a reason that I typed it you long-haired, drug-crazed load of adolescent pimple-arsed hippies!
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    Machines that nag at you. Microwaves that keep...

    Machines that nag at you. Microwaves that keep beeping when they've finished. Washing machines are just as bad.
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    Car park ticket machines that make you type in...

    Car park ticket machines that make you type in your registration number but then time out before you can find the right coins to put in making you go through the whole f*****g procedure again.
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    Google results that don't include the answer...

    Google results that don't include the answer you're looking for because they want you to click on their links.
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    I think that in order to be fair the receiver...

    I think that in order to be fair the receiver should be allowed to make a large scream at any time they choose.
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    Smartphone zombies. Walk towards you and then...

    Smartphone zombies. Walk towards you and then when you stop in front of them suddenly look up and wonder where they are.

    There should be a special lane for them. Preferably down the middle of the...
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    On the other side... I have met a couple of...

    On the other side... I have met a couple of Americans in international cruises who have benefited on separate occasions from the NHS. Both were expecting and fully prepared to pay for their...
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    They're even worse ;)

    They're even worse ;)
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    Middle lane joggers turn a three-lane motorway...

    Middle lane joggers turn a three-lane motorway into a two-lane motorway. They should be pulled over and summarily executed (without blocking the hard shoulder, obviously)
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    True, but how many speedometers are accurate? ...

    True, but how many speedometers are accurate?

    The police view is that it is not the job of the individual to police the motorway. In any case motorways only operate properly if everybody keeps to...
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    Cameron was not in a position to offer that...

    Cameron was not in a position to offer that promise nor to implement it, as we have found out. It was most likely unconstitutional too. It was for Parliament to decide on the outcome, not ‘the...
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