****test job you have had

For me i did a bit of labouring on a building site for a while when i needed some cash and was out of work for a bit, £6 an hour to break up wooden pallets, carry bits of plasterboard around in the ****ty cold weather, a cleaning up after the trades, working like a dog and being reminded the Poles do it for half the money every 5 minutes getting up at 5.45 every day for a 7.30 start etc. So **** that i got offered a job hod carrying and saw that as a promotion. To be fair i didn't mind hod carrying, not a great job but had a bit of a laugh, site agent was a c*nt though, one day was about 30 degrees and had bumping out blocks for a hour and a half, stopped for a drink, sweating pooring off me, and he shouts up the scaffold 'what a you doing stood around for? Get on with some f*cking work' cheeky c*nt. Glad to be back in sales

Working on one of the hygeine teams at Hovis, Eastleigh. Paid £2.80 an hour to go inside/underneath/into bakery equipment and clear out the accumulated crap from a weeks worth of production. The banter with the other lads was good but the money was just so bad.

Only lasted a few months before receiving considerably more cash working at Southampton Airport café/bar.

Sales and Marketing Manager for Michelle McManus plc

Working on one of the hygeine teams at Hovis, Eastleigh. Paid £2.80 an hour to go inside/underneath/into bakery equipment and clear out the accumulated crap from a weeks worth of production. The banter with the other lads was good but the money was just so bad.

 

Only lasted a few months before receiving considerably more cash working at Southampton Airport café/bar.

I did the same years ago at Kipling cakes...happy days.

For a summer job whilst at school, I worked for a packaging company that packed cosmetics for Estee Lauder.

I sat on the production line with a rubber mallet for three weeks banging the stoppers in the tops of perfume bottles. Occasionally I would get carried away and smash a bottle or two. The only problem was going home on the bus stinking of womens perfume.

For the second half of the holiday, I got promoted up the line to be the one who placed the stopper on the bottle before the poor ****er sat next to me had to hammer it in.

That summer provided me with the motivation to get off my arse and do something because I could not do that for the rest of my life.

worked on a turkey farm in chichester, chopping up turkey breast all day. £2.15 an hour. then the next day i thought id made it, when i got to staple boxes together all day

served breakfasts at the portsmouth hilton, that was bad, similar money, and really really bad for yor self esteem. still, at least i was working and earning and not scrounging i suppose

also worked at the fruit importers in pompey docks. had to stand in huge vats all day and pick out all the mouldy fruit, whislt dodging the spiders. £1.89 an hour. im not sure they are allowed to have people do that sort of thing these days

Working as a cleaner in the council buildings in eastliegh, wasn't bad money for a 16 year old working around my college courses but it taught me that i didn't want to go around cleaning up peoples sh*t and leftovers all my life. This job was made all the worse when every now and again you had to clean the toilets.

I worked for a petfood company when I was 16 for about 6 months. I was getting paid based on how much I packaged. Got about £25 a month lol.

Willy Rushtons chiropodist when I was 17, the dirty ba5tard had toes like a chicken.

Ive worked for...

MOD - War mongers

Siemens - Made bombs during WW2

BAT - Give people cancer

Zurich Municiple - Hoarded Nazi gold during WW2.

The actual jobs I did there werent that bad, but some pretty ****ty companies none the less.

Chip boy @ J.Henry's chip shop, Hedge End

Hill House school, support worker to kids with autiscm. Thought I would be doing some good, found it to be a total nightmare. Headbutted, kicked, bitten, pinched, cut lip all in one month. Mentally exhausting with horrible shift patterns and staff that didn't want to be there.

Hill House school, support worker to kids with autiscm. Thought I would be doing some good, found it to be a total nightmare. Headbutted, kicked, bitten, pinched, cut lip all in one month. Mentally exhausting with horrible shift patterns and staff that didn't want to be there.

all part of a days work

Chip boy @ J.Henry's chip shop, Hedge End

Ha.I did the same thing for the chip shop in Netley in the late seventies.

Ha.I did the same thing for the chip shop in Netley in the late seventies.

The Jolly Friar was the best chipppy bar none in the 70's/80's, don't know about now though............as for the ****tiest job, a well known drain unblocking/clearance firm.

Milkman for 2 and a bit years, what an absolute sack of ****.

6 day week finish Saturday lunchtime (if lucky) start all over again midnight Sunday.

Don't believe the stories either about the bored housewives.

Retrieving lobsters from Jayne Mansfield's bum.

.... big tits, huge bum, and everything like that, it was quite a task 'cause she had a big bum .....

..... and they were big lobsters.

The Jolly Friar was the best chipppy bar none in the 70's/80's, don't know about now though............as for the ****tiest job, a well known drain unblocking/clearance firm.

Tis not a bad chippy still.

I worked on the agency doing some salad packing for 4 pound an hour when I dropped out of college. Truely was horrendous

Auxiliary in a geriatric ward in Orpington Hospital at the age of 15.

I still suffer from flashbacks and trauma.

Chip boy @ J.Henry's chip shop, Hedge End

Haha no way. Did u turn to drugs whilst there? I swear everyone who works there these days becomes a druggy.

Working on one of the hygeine teams at Hovis, Eastleigh. Paid £2.80 an hour to go inside/underneath/into bakery equipment and clear out the accumulated crap from a weeks worth of production. The banter with the other lads was good but the money was just so bad.

 

Only lasted a few months before receiving considerably more cash working at Southampton Airport café/bar.

LOL ... my first part time job whilst doing my A levels at Barton Peveril was working in the Canteen and Bookshop on Sundays and the occassional Saturday, dependent on Saints games! at Eastleigh () International Airport. This was long before the terminal was revamped and to be honest it was pretty good fun, although having to charge old biddys on SAGA flights to Jersey 25p for a packet of boiled sweets that cost 10p elsewhere was a bit of a downer.

Probably the high light of my career (lol) there was the day after the 76 Cup Final parading my life size Blue Peter Special replica FA Cup made out of cardboard, tin foil and blue and yellow ribbons, on the front of the slops trolley whilst going around clearing up cups and plates etc off the tables and winding up some Moan U fans on their way back to The Channel Isles.

Also another perk was being able to flick through the Porn mags in the stockroom. Remember we are talking pre Innernet porn, pre Sky porn channels, pre Channel 4 documentaries and p!ssed up on Alcopop sluts getting their puppies out each weekend, so this was a rare chance for a teenager to see some beaver action close up

When I was at Uni I did some work for an agency and got put in a furniture factory wrapping up three piece suites. It was alright and got to be good mates with the other lads who I worked with, but because I was a good worker and the foreman had commented on this the agency found me a better job in a ****ing pot pouri factory (was more like a pig sty really) and my job was to wade into dried pettals and stuff with a watering can of perfume and pour it all over. At the end of the day I ****ing reeked of perfume and had to get on a bus and everyone looked at me. I told them to ram it and never went back.

Haha no way. Did u turn to drugs whilst there? I swear everyone who works there these days becomes a druggy.

i know pretty much everyone who works there mate, one of whom is one of my best mates.....quite a career

How do you know the place?

i know pretty much everyone who works there mate, one of whom is one of my best mates.....quite a career

 

How do you know the place?

s_s I used to work with a woman named Tracy at LHR who was/is the owners niece, do you know her? Masssive David Bowie fan

s_s I used to work with a woman named Tracy at LHR who was/is the owners niece, do you know her? Masssive David Bowie fan

Well i know the owner, the owners son and daughter and the owners dad.........

Don't know a tracey though

i know pretty much everyone who works there mate, one of whom is one of my best mates.....quite a career

 

How do you know the place?

Ha well I must admit when I say 'everyone' I base this on a couple of people I don't really know, perhaps a slightly sweeping assumption- no offence intended! I just know it being a Hedge Ender.

Ha well I must admit when I say 'everyone' I base this on a couple of people I don't really know' date=' perhaps a slightly sweeping assumption- no offence intended! I just know it being a Hedge Ender.[/quote']

 

Not offended mate. Granted, there were some nutters working there for a while, and the codfather!

 

a fellow hedge ender eh

Not offended mate. Granted, there were some nutters working there for a while, and the codfather!

 

a fellow hedge ender eh

haha yeh good old codfather. Yeh we had a talk via pm before I believe- you and my sister were in the same year at Wildern.

haha yeh good old codfather. Yeh we had a talk via pm before I believe- you and my sister were in the same year at Wildern.

yes this is true.

yes this is true.

Poor girl

Working on one of the hygeine teams at Hovis, Eastleigh. Paid £2.80 an hour to go inside/underneath/into bakery equipment and clear out the accumulated crap from a weeks worth of production. The banter with the other lads was good but the money was just so bad.

 

Only lasted a few months before receiving considerably more cash working at Southampton Airport café/bar.

Bit of a recuring trend, I worked at british bakeries clenaing the bread pallets, was cold wet and wasnt working with the most gifted of people, stuck it for three days I think.

Think I must be pretty lucky in jobs really

Barclays

Fitness First - Although the hours were sh1t

Bacardi

All pretty decent really, can't complain too much.

Door to door double-glazing sales for Zenith Staysh!te.

On my first day we did Hedge End and the Team Leader told us to target the bungalows at nightfall as they were generally owned by pensioners who would be asleep and if you woke them, they would be more likely to agree to double glazing.

Was paid on commission but I had too good a conscience to actually ever make a sale. Left after one shift.

St Moores letting agents on london RD......

Homebase whilst at college - only took the job for the uniform, lovely green dungarees with green/white check ben sherman shirt with brown tie - lovely ! Many a lovely weekend spent outside in freezing cold cleaning garden centre floor.

July 2009 until November 2009.

Misrecruited, salary information and wage structure not explained clearly. To say he lied would get me into all sorts of rancour, so I'll say he was

incompetent.*

Held my line manager in utter contempt after my first day, was that one steep learning curve!

Some here will know where I was.

*As described in the findings from the official, independent, enquiry into my complaint and those of other people.

In about 1990 i did door to door selling of Sky TV in deepest East End London

Trying to sell it to asians who couldn't speak English and people in tower blocks who wouldn't be allowed it anyway.

Stayed about 3 months for some bizarre reason.

Did have the occasion perks though. ;-)

In about 1990 i did door to door selling of Sky TV in deepest East End London

Trying to sell it to asians who couldn't speak English and people in tower blocks who wouldn't be allowed it anyway.

 

Stayed about 3 months for some bizarre reason.

 

Did have the occasion perks though. ;-)

Didn't they make a movie about you ... CableMan or something. Or were you in the XXX Rated one

In about 1990 i did door to door selling of Sky TV in deepest East End London

Trying to sell it to asians who couldn't speak English and people in tower blocks who wouldn't be allowed it anyway.

 

Stayed about 3 months for some bizarre reason.

 

Did have the occasion perks though. ;-)

The odd free curry?

Pumiceing my mum's feet for 5 quid pocket money.

In real job terms, then tempting for Audi UK. Data entry, they wanted sixty forms inputted in one hour. It took three minutes at least to do each one. Everyone got to drive the new TT, the original one, except me. I was let go for being too slow. We all were. Sixty in an hour was impossible.

Retrieving lobsters from Jayne Mansfield's bum.

 

 

.... big tits, huge bum, and everything like that, it was quite a task 'cause she had a big bum .....

 

 

..... and they were big lobsters.

'Lobsterisimus Bummakisimus'?

Only had two real jobs, Sales Assistant at Boots and Telemarketing, which i'm doing at the moment. Both are pretty sh1t.

Worked at a motorway services while between courses. I lasted 3 months but was amazed at how some workers were there after a few years. It was dull. The best part was working on the huge dishwasher (3m long) when it was busy as you just kept you going for the whole shift. Nights where OK as you could scoff the decent food!

There are certain things I wouldn't eat because of the experience of working there such as pies, although the dishes were put through the dishwasher most of the time there wasn't time to clean them properly so for the next customer there was a bit of pastry from the previous pie! Also the cream desserts only got changed when a customer complained it was off. That was 22 years ago so it would be interesting to see if practises have changed. Soon got out of that as the money was **** poor as well as the management.

About ten years ago me and Stu had a job weighing chickens somewhere near Reading. It was great we got covered in chicken **** for about £4 an hour.

For me i did a bit of labouring on a building site for a while when i needed some cash and was out of work for a bit, £6 an hour to break up wooden pallets, carry bits of plasterboard around in the ****ty cold weather, a cleaning up after the trades, working like a dog and being reminded the Poles do it for half the money every 5 minutes getting up at 5.45 every day for a 7.30 start etc. So **** that i got offered a job hod carrying and saw that as a promotion. To be fair i didn't mind hod carrying, not a great job but had a bit of a laugh, site agent was a c*nt though, one day was about 30 degrees and had bumping out blocks for a hour and a half, stopped for a drink, sweating pooring off me, and he shouts up the scaffold 'what a you doing stood around for? Get on with some f*cking work' cheeky c*nt. Glad to be back in sales

That sounds like a decent job, man up.

That sounds like a decent job, man up.

The Hod carrying was okay, bit of a laugh, plus i think brickies know its quite hard graft so they have a laugh with you. The labouring was ****, cleaning up, moving **** about, just mind numbing and any c*nt can do it.

Driving a bus, **** shift patterns, constant complaints of why are you late?, where is the X bus?, dickhead Drivers cutting you up, trying to beat you over take you etc people puking, fighting, dying on your bus. Daily abuse, yeah its all fun!!!

So tomorrow when you are driving to work and you see a bus trying to get out, let it - cheers

When I was freelancing as a setting out engineer I couldn't get a job in construction as it was near Christmas, so I got a job washing up through an agency. Was treated really badly by women in the Southern Water offices canteen in West End. Stuck with it over the Christmas period and enjoyed telling the Chef, who was a quite attractive 6 ft tall but *****ie blond, that I was leaving at the end of the week on a Wednesday, and she threw a fit, saying she wouldn't sign my timesheet. Told her I didn't care as I was going from earning £7 per hour to £18 an hour. As she didn't know my back ground it shocked them a little, but glad to fu{k them over in the end. And I'm glad I stole the meat box as well as they sat down and had a christmas dinner and left me out, and I had to wash their plates so worked an extra two hours but never got paid for it.

Driving a school bus, only lasted 2 weeks.The bus demist didn't work so trying to keep the windscreen clear was a nightmare.The kids helped by wiping one part whilst

I did the part in front of me. Totally illegal as kids were not allowed to be level or in front of the driver. Was told to fill a milk bottle with hot water and place it on the dash.

The drivers seat was loose and 2nd gear didn't work so on part of the trip 1st was to low and 3rd was to high.Decided that I wouldn't risk kids lives in such a dangerous bus

I would never have been able to face the parents if we had crashed and some had been hurt.Max load was about 54 kids of all ages and about 10 were allowed to stand up

during the run. 4 weeks after I left they scrapped that bus.