Things to do in Bangkok

Right then, going to be spending a couple of days in Bangkok with the missus. She has put the mockers on any kind ping pong firing shenanigans, so I am looking for great things to do "for couples". Any ideas?

there is nothing left to do, then

You could Bangkok with the missus?

I fear my expectations of how much help this thread would be may have been too high!

Rose garden, big Bhudda, palace, vertiginous drinks in the Sky Bar, spin around the waterways on a longtail, buzz around on Tuk-Tuks. See a fingernail dance, get her a massage, eat street food and in fine restaurants (Face is a good to end version).

Endless list really.

Go visit the bridge over the river kwai it isn't too far from their and did it myself.

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Going to take a run up to this. So many things do to as couples. Firstly, you and your mrs into 3!sums? Did that's myself. Not too far.

I would recommend dinner at the Sky Bar. Not cheap but stunning location.

Fuck that, you're underestimating his Mrs. I've been ther with a few birds. Go to patpong, worst that can happen is you have a laugh with the mrs and she gets a but horny. If not, pay a tut tut driver 200 bht for a tour.

MUST GO - MBK Centre. For her Wearhouse for you XL for men & Export shop. Eat lunch at the 6th floor food court Stewed Pork Limb & Rice or Crispy Pork & Duck with Rice about 2 quid. Yummmmmmmmmmm Iced coffee to wash it down or a Singha (you have to buy vouchers & can cash any left overs back afters)

Eat Tom Yum & Steamed Sea Bass at Sukhumvit Soi 7 Food Centre. Looks like a public toilet cheapest & best seafood in BKK. Good bar for footie next door.

Take Silom Line Skytrain from Siam to Saphan Taksin. Exit towards the river. Haggle like an idiot with the Tour Boat people (down to at least 40% discount so start at 60%. Take a Long Tailed Boat for 2 Canal Tour. Stop at the "floating market" (chick in a boat) buy beers for you & driver. Cruise the canal for an hour sipping beer. FEED THE FISH - most important, visit Wat Arun, exit the boat at River boat stop by Grand Palace & Emerald Buddha (Check the days it is open, is 100 m walk from boat check dress code Mrs cannot wear stappy top or short skirt/dress also may need to wear socks) Visit the Temple & Palace.

Depending on stamina retire for a few cool beers or take Tuk Tuk to Platinum Mall in Pratunam (unless Misses is an XXL size) Platinum is a new Mall not much for us 6 foot blokes but 1,000's of small Thai Designers crazy but the women LOVE the stuff there.

Fine Dining you must go to Cabbages & Condoms in Sukhumvit - sit outside feel good about donating to charity & admire the Light shades & buy souvenirs.

Patpong (Ladyboy bars & Nightmarket) is overpriced and full of touts but you can get 60% discount but hassle from touts for Ping Pong shows (DON'T GO they make you want to Vomit)

You CAN take the Wife to Angel Witch 2nd floor in Nana Plaza. Nana is a very sad run down place these days, Angel Witch is the only GoGo bar with any style to it. The Owners wife is a Post Op Ladyboy but is a Choreographer. As such the girls put on "Semi Erotic shows with a 50 shades edge to them"

However, I CAN say I have taken my Kids & my 80 year old Mum there, sure it was "mildly suggestive" had some nudity but was a world away from nasty places. (Oh and they ALL loved it)

More fun is to head to Soi 13 (I think) on Sukhumvit to Soi Cowboy. You can walk down the street and it has a much better party vibe than Patpong or Nana. Also there is a damn fine have beer listen to Thai Heavy Metal Cover Band at Country Road at one end (no naked chicks) and a decent pub grub at the other end The Old Dutch

Further out at the end of Soi 33 is The Londoner Brew Pub, make their own Pale Ale & Lager huge place good nosh and ALMOST tastes like Real Ale - good to watch the footie.

Oh and STRONGLY advise - do NOT clean your teeth with tap water - they provide bottled water - USE IT. Also it is hot & you get Dehydrated so 7/11's sell Pocari Sweat & Gatorade Isotonics - use them

Oh & always Oil Massage not Thai (They HURT) you can always have a Smiley Middle in case you aren't allowed a Happy Ending

PM for the full tour brief done it soooooo many times Yarowat Street Chinese Market for Handbags & Accessories/Jewellery, Mo Chit/Ratuchat park for getting pick pocketed Terminal for Girly shopping & good cinema.

Robinsons & Central & Emporium for sales on Designer gear

Fuck that, you're underestimating his Mrs. I've been ther with a few birds. Go to patpong, worst that can happen is you have a laugh with the mrs and she gets a but horny. If not, pay a tut tut driver 200 bht for a tour.

ALWAYS start them in the Ladyboy bars. They start defensive, have a couple of drinks get inquisitive and off you go.

Just be careful NOT to end up taking her to XBoys....

Although (you'll love this) the How to putt a golf ball sketch is still one of the funniest things I have ever seen (Mate's stag weekend) Horrible but ROFLCOPTERS

Going to take a run up to this. So many things do to as couples. Firstly, you and your mrs into 3!sums? Did that's myself. Not too far.

Trying to work out how you did a 3some yourself?

Oh & always Oil Massage not Thai (They HURT) you can always have a Smiley Middle in case you aren't allowed a Happy Ending

Got to ask. Whats a smiley middle?

Got to ask. Whats a smiley middle?

There's a bloody good massage place - has a His & Her room, and is a TOTALLY SERIOUSLY NEVER WE WILL CALL THE POLICE no sex policy place.

Which is good as you can go through the whole massage without the whole fear of someone attacking your bits uninvited and demanding money....

Which then means when you go on your own 'cos the Misses has gone for a Facial/Manicure/Pedicure you can relax and as they do the whole Oily bit up the legs without getting TOO close you can have a gentle semi...........

Before they move on to the final bending you in half malarky

There's a bloody good massage place - has a His & Her room, and is a TOTALLY SERIOUSLY NEVER WE WILL CALL THE POLICE no sex policy place.

 

Which is good as you can go through the whole massage without the whole fear of someone attacking your bits uninvited and demanding money....

 

Which then means when you go on your own 'cos the Misses has gone for a Facial/Manicure/Pedicure you can relax and as they do the whole Oily bit up the legs without getting TOO close you can have a gentle semi...........

 

Before they move on to the final bending you in half malarky

Ah, ta. As a bloke its really difficult to get one of those sensual relaxing 'touching and stroking' massages that places routinely dole out for women. Seems that no matter where you go the options are being pummelled and knuckled for an hour or someone trying to **** you off. Would be nice to just be able to relax sometimes.

Ah, ta. As a bloke its really difficult to get one of those sensual relaxing 'touching and stroking' massages that places routinely dole out for women. Seems that no matter where you go the options are being pummelled and knuckled for an hour or someone trying to **** you off. Would be nice to just be able to relax sometimes.

Oily is ALWAYS the answer.

Just make sure Miss Buctootim knows you are going OR they have a damned good shower - the slippery bathtub or stink of Advocado Oil is always a dead giveaway and until they have been to somewhere like BKK they'll NEVER understand how a smile middle is possible without the happy ending

Soi 5 Sukhumvit about 20 metres AFTER Foodland is the only reliable NOT ***** off I have been able to relax in BKK

I little bit love golfing phil. I never read all his posts as most longer than 18 holes but what I do I love. Like a pitch a d put version.

An acquaintance of mine managed to find the only non-****y massage parlour in Pattaya.

He was not pleased.

Phil has never slept with prossie in his whole life. Oh no Sir-ree . Not one. Never.

 

Fine Dining you must go to Cabbages & Condoms in Sukhumvit - sit outside feel good about donating to charity & admire the Light shades & buy souvenirs.

I will second that, you must sit outside in the courtyard. They do a Fish poached in a Garlic consommé absolutely divine.

No doubt Phil has played Muang-Kaew Golf Course Which is a very nice spot despite a motorway splitting it in half.

I will second that, you must sit outside in the courtyard. They do a Fish poached in a Garlic consommé absolutely divine.

 

No doubt Phil has played Muang-Kaew Golf Course Which is a very nice spot despite a motorway splitting it in half.

Why the hell would anyone play golf in Bangkok? Far too much else to do (But yes strangely I have)

The BLUE Dim Sum @ Cabbages & Condoms is astonishing and the Spicy Crispy Duck Salad has the same impact that Douglas Adams described a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster having.

(Bought the C&C Cook Book for a mate, he gave it to his Son who was a Trainee Chef. Son cooked it at an Interview and got a job in a Michelin * Restaurant in London - true story)

(For the uninitiated C&C is the focal point of a major Charity educating & helping the poor in Thailand and fighting against Aids etc. They recently received a $500k grant from the Bill Gates Foundation. Their menu also helps to keep some more traditional dishes alive

http://www.cabbagesandcondoms.com/index.php

Whilst being a Top Restaurant with outdoors dining being heavenly, you actually know that the money you spend on Dinner is doing some good for a change. No after dinner mints, they give every diner a Condom)

Bloody hell, just found this!

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2238323/Cabbages-Condoms-restaurant-UK-offer-family-planning-leaflets-meal.html

Now open in Bicester! Won't quite have the same ambience methinks

Bloody hell, just found this!

 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2238323/Cabbages-Condoms-restaurant-UK-offer-family-planning-leaflets-meal.html

 

Now open in Bicester! Won't quite have the same ambience methinks

Oh dear!! What a shame!

But if you have not or will not go to Bangkok then you will have a bit of a giggle at all the condom stuff.

(Phil the golf was killing time before an early afternoon flight to Guangzhou China).

Oh dear!! What a shame!

 

But if you have not or will not go to Bangkok then you will have a bit of a giggle at all the condom stuff.

 

(Phil the golf was killing time before an early afternoon flight to Guangzhou China).

OK so in that case, how the hell did you wake up early enough to play Golf?

(Sending Mrs D+P up the back of the Chapel to sit near you lot Sunday. Be gentle, she bites)

Problem here is that its a bit like saying I've got two days in London, what do you recommend?? Such a big place, heat can take it out of you and sometimes travelling across the city can be arduous.

DP and others have come up with some decent ideas, and my top places/things would be:

Day

As Phil says, shopping at MBK

A trip around Grand Palace & temple and would suggest a decent tour guide to get the most out of it

A couple of hours at Jim Thompsons House, a little oasis in the hustle and bustle

Vimanmek teak palace and grounds

Agree with a haggled longtail around the canals from Saphan Taksin (I've paid anything from 400 to 1200 baht in total for an hour for 3 or 4 people, probably more nowadays!!!)

Night

My top tip would be a sunset cruise on the "Loy Nava". Google it, it's an old rice barge that goes up and down the river. Best thing I've done of an evening (honest)

Drink at Sky Bar (meal if you're splashing out) or same at Vertigo

Great bar near paptpong on Soi Thaniya (Japan st) is The Barbican. Stylish bar with great food amidst a blade runner set!

Otherwise DP has mentioned many good places, but I personally don't like cabbages and condoms

Let your missus have a go with a ladyboy so she can have a go with someone more manly than you.

Right then, going to be spending a couple of days in Bangkok with the missus. She has put the mockers on any kind ping pong firing shenanigans, so I am looking for great things to do "for couples". Any ideas?

Waste of time going then. Stay home and save your money.

I come to Bangkok every couple of weeks for work.

Seen some good suggestions so far.

The boat around the river's and canals is good way to spend an afternoon.

Also around Saphin Taksin where you get the boat from there are loads of Silver craft shops if you are interested in buying silver goods..

They will often custom make stuff for you but can take a week or so.

Would definitely recommend Jim Thompson's House

The Barbican that Um suggested used to be a good bar but has closed.

Haven't seen anyone mention Chatachak market yet. Huge weekend market where you can get just about anything. Only open Saturdays and Sundays.

Loads of shopping around Siam Paragon and WTC but you won't find to many bargains. All the big designer stores.

Fake stuff Patpong Market or Chatachak

The Bridge over the River Kwai (Kanchanaburi) is doable in a day and really interesting but it is a long drive. We did an over night as there is a lot more to see there than just the Bridge itself.

A slightly closer day excursion is Ayutthaya. The old Siam Capital. Bit like Ankor Wat but on a slightly smaller scale. We went by car and come back on a boat along the river. Note all the Budha statues have had their heads cut off by the Khmer raiders who sacked the city a few hundred years ago

I think Lemongrass on Sukhumvit Soi 24 is a nicer restaurant than Cabbages that some have mentioned.

Baan Khanita on Sathorn Road

Good bars include No Idea on Soi 20'. Soi 8 bar, Hide and Seek in Soi Ruam Rudee and Molley Mallones at Soi Convent. Some good bars on Soi 33'as well. The penalty spot on Sukhumvit between Soi 29 and Soi 31 is a good place to watch the football.

As others have mentioned both the Sky Bar and Vertigo offer excellent views of the city.

Phil has never slept with prossie in his whole life. Oh no Sir-ree . Not one. Never.

I come to Bangkok every couple of weeks for work.

 

Seen some good suggestions so far.

 

The boat around the river's and canals is good way to spend an afternoon.

 

Also around Saphin Taksin where you get the boat from there are loads of Silver craft shops if you are interested in buying silver goods..

 

They will often custom make stuff for you but can take a week or so.

 

Would definitely recommend Jim Thompson's House

 

The Barbican that Um suggested used to be a good bar but has closed.

 

Haven't seen anyone mention Chatachak market yet. Huge weekend market where you can get just about anything. Only open Saturdays and Sundays.

 

Loads of shopping around Siam Paragon and WTC but you won't find to many bargains. All the big designer stores.

 

Fake stuff Patpong Market or Chatachak

 

The Bridge over the River Kwai (Kanchanaburi) is doable in a day and really interesting but it is a long drive. We did an over night as there is a lot more to see there than just the Bridge itself.

 

A slightly closer day excursion is Ayutthaya. The old Siam Capital. Bit like Ankor Wat but on a slightly smaller scale. We went by car and come back on a boat along the river. Note all the Budha statues have had their heads cut off by the Khmer raiders who sacked the city a few hundred years ago

 

I think Lemongrass on Sukhumvit Soi 24 is a nicer restaurant than Cabbages that some have mentioned.

 

Baan Khanita on Sathorn Road

 

Good bars include No Idea on Soi 20'. Soi 8 bar, Hide and Seek in Soi Ruam Rudee and Molley Mallones at Soi Convent. Some good bars on Soi 33'as well. The penalty spot on Sukhumvit between Soi 29 and Soi 31 is a good place to watch the football.

 

As others have mentioned both the Sky Bar and Vertigo offer excellent views of the city.

I agree about the weekend market at Chatachak. It is HUGE and sells pretty well everything.

I also agree about the Lemon Grass restaurant, which is a bit more expensive than some, but nice authentic old atmosphere.

Also worth seeing is the Floating Market. Not the one in Bangkok, which is a Disneyfied copy for the tourists. The real one means an early start and a bit of a drive well out of Bangkok. But when we visited it, we did the River Kwai the same day. The bridge itself is nothing special, but the War Graves and the museum are a moving experience.

Thanks guys. We will definately give some of those ideas a go.

I come to Bangkok every couple of weeks for work.

 

Seen some good suggestions so far.

 

The boat around the river's and canals is good way to spend an afternoon.

 

Also around Saphin Taksin where you get the boat from there are loads of Silver craft shops if you are interested in buying silver goods..

 

They will often custom make stuff for you but can take a week or so.

 

Would definitely recommend Jim Thompson's House

 

The Barbican that Um suggested used to be a good bar but has closed.

 

Haven't seen anyone mention Chatachak market yet. Huge weekend market where you can get just about anything. Only open Saturdays and Sundays.

 

Loads of shopping around Siam Paragon and WTC but you won't find to many bargains. All the big designer stores.

 

Fake stuff Patpong Market or Chatachak

 

The Bridge over the River Kwai (Kanchanaburi) is doable in a day and really interesting but it is a long drive. We did an over night as there is a lot more to see there than just the Bridge itself.

 

A slightly closer day excursion is Ayutthaya. The old Siam Capital. Bit like Ankor Wat but on a slightly smaller scale. We went by car and come back on a boat along the river. Note all the Budha statues have had their heads cut off by the Khmer raiders who sacked the city a few hundred years ago

 

I think Lemongrass on Sukhumvit Soi 24 is a nicer restaurant than Cabbages that some have mentioned.

 

Baan Khanita on Sathorn Road

 

Good bars include No Idea on Soi 20'. Soi 8 bar, Hide and Seek in Soi Ruam Rudee and Molley Mallones at Soi Convent. Some good bars on Soi 33'as well. The penalty spot on Sukhumvit between Soi 29 and Soi 31 is a good place to watch the football.

 

As others have mentioned both the Sky Bar and Vertigo offer excellent views of the city.

Thought Ayutthaya was pretty spot on - got the train there and back.

Also try and get to the reclining Buddha - along with the Grand Palace both excellent for sight seeing.

Will endorse Phils option of the Food Center on Soi 7 - great food and cheap.

Limpini park is nice to get out of the chaos and not far from Patpong night market.

Nana plaza is pretty tame so if you want to have a gander I'm sure the missus won't feel threatened - mine wasn't.

Hey, HK Phoey, when did the Barbican close??? Was always a place we'd pop in for a drink and tapas, along with The ExecutiveLounge in Patpong 2 (Exec Lounge was first bar I ever went in many moons ago & was just a tradition to have first drink there every trip).

Chatachuk is definitely worth a mention, my only issue was with two days it can be a bit hectic and tiring!!!! Would have said Suan Lum night bazaar as really loved that place and its beer garden, but that's also disappeared!!

Have you been to Lek Seafood under Ching Nosi sky train, my favourite seafood place but off between track.

With little one now on the scene, think it might be a few years before we get back East!!! Caravans in Devon and more sensible options might have to be the order of the day. I really miss the Sanuk!!!!

Thought Ayutthaya was pretty spot on - got the train there and back.

 

Also try and get to the reclining Buddha - along with the Grand Palace both excellent for sight seeing.

 

Will endorse Phils option of the Food Center on Soi 7 - great food and cheap.

 

Limpini park is nice to get out of the chaos and not far from Patpong night market.

 

Nana plaza is pretty tame so if you want to have a gander I'm sure the missus won't feel threatened - mine wasn't.

Was there on honeymoon in June on the right up one floor on the balcony all drinks were a quid. Neat spot to people watch. Cowboy is just so much more FUN these days

OK so in that case, how the hell did you wake up early enough to play Golf?

 

(Sending Mrs D+P up the back of the Chapel to sit near you lot Sunday. Be gentle, she bites)

Body clock was shot, this was the tried and tested Jetlag cure, fly into Bangkok check into the Novotel next to the airport, shower change, then into the waiting Mercedes people carrier whisked downtown for a meeting with our man there (very amusing German who's lived there 20 years) Whistle stop tour of some sights, then dinner in C&C and a quick trip down the naughty boys street for a few beers beating off the women (tell them you are staying out by the Airport and they just evaporate!!). Bed.

Next morning tee time 07:20 it was only when chipping into the 1st green and you hear a motor and look for the lawn mower only to see 4 blokes casually heading to work in one of those typical Thai boats with the long shafts out the back on the canal that crosses the fairway, just as the sun comes out from behind the clouds and the Mercury and humidity rockets, and land crabs stand looking menacingly at you claws open: that you go "hang on this is mental it's 01:30 at home!!

Into China in time for dinner including Scorpions and Bee Larvae omelette, Hotel,drink, bed, then down to breakfast for 07:30 never even noticed I had fastforwarded 7hrs the whole week.

Regarding Mrs DP's bite we will all be safe as we all got evicted to one block over 2 rows up this season.

Hey, HK Phoey, when did the Barbican close??? Was always a place we'd pop in for a drink and tapas, along with The ExecutiveLounge in Patpong 2 (Exec Lounge was first bar I ever went in many moons ago & was just a tradition to have first drink there every trip).

 

Chatachuk is definitely worth a mention, my only issue was with two days it can be a bit hectic and tiring!!!! Would have said Suan Lum night bazaar as really loved that place and its beer garden, but that's also disappeared!!

 

Have you been to Lek Seafood under Ching Nosi sky train, my favourite seafood place but off between track.

 

With little one now on the scene, think it might be a few years before we get back East!!! Caravans in Devon and more sensible options might have to be the order of the day. I really miss the Sanuk!!!!

Not sure when the Barbican closed. Used to come to Bangkok every week a few years ago and The Barbican was always one of the places we used to hang out.

Last few years have not been coming to Bangkok quite so much up until about six months ago when I started visiting regularly again, anyway thought I would wander down their one night and it was closed and gutted out.