Deppo

Not going too well for you, eh dune?

Actually I'm going out at half seven so I can't play in that one.

I'm going to take you down to China town. I'm going to wipe the floor with you. You is going dooooooooooowwwwwwwnnnnn.

Play a hand, you pussy.

Excuses.

Time to take the head off it before the big poker game.

That's what bad poker players do. You sound like a very bad poker player.

Stick with me, kid.

He's an angry man. Angry men are easy to beat. They start steaming after a bad beat. I'll have him on tilt within a few hands.

Crouchie, shall we collude against dune?

You still haven't worked it out. Typical thicko Tory.

What was wrong with you?

I won't. It's more fun seeing if you can work it out.

Work it out. The clues are there.

It's also Day of the Ninja. Coincidence?

I'm going to take you down to China town. I'm going to wipe the floor with you. You are mild-mannered milquetoast.

When I last went to Brizzy in 2009 to visit my uncle and auntie, I saw about 3-4 Saints shirts at the airport. Then, on the drive to their house, I saw about 10 kids playing football in the park and about 7 of them were wearing Saints shirts, with one Celtic, one United and one Liverpool shirt. During the two weeks that I stayed, I must have seen in the region of 50 different people wearing Saints shirts. I was a little disappointing to see this wasn't converted at the Test - any Brizzy residents out there, can you tell me has this depletion of Saints fans since last year got anything to do with some of the decisions that Nicola Cortese has made over the past year? I'm willing to stake quite a bit that it has.

You are going down.

I am one of those two, but I'm not telling you which one.

You can't check until it is your turn to act. You don't even have any cards yet. This is going to be easy.

I'm playing. My username is wasabipeanut38. I'm going to take you down.

No, but Robbie Keane is not as big a name as David Hirst, so he is comparable. Hirst was a huge name and player for us in the Prem, and now Keane is of a similar standing to that now we are L1. So let's not rule anything out just yet! Like I say, stranger things have happened (and not always to us - do you remember Tevez and Maskarano playing for West Ham not so long back? Or Socrates playing for Garford Town?)

Wot no skool.

Jongleurs shut down when they went into administration a couple of years back. Someone bought a few of the busier venues and kept them open, but Southampton is no more.

I'd love to have this as it looks beautiful, but I don't drink solid dark mango coffee and I don't know anybody who does.