rallyboy

another glorious courtroom triumph for the Fatpipe Faithless, yes this additional fortnight of admin and legal fees really strengthens the Trust's hand. Anyone care to estimate how many pledges have been gobbled up since the intitial court date? Two bald men are now caught in a bidding war for a broken hairdryer. I reckon Birch could empty the Trust coffers completely by the time he's established a value for the ground.

If the club was liquidated, Chinny would do 'okay', and the PDT would be alright with the world's firstest and bestest-ever phoenix club. Whereas the big losers would be the HNWI's and the council, if they are dim enough to bung a few million down a black hole. It'll be a brave councillor who stands up and supports that motion, or stands against it - in fact we could be in for the first ever silent council debate. The Trust in particular is looking to shift the exposure onto other parties, as an organisation they have little to lose - and along with Chinny they would be much better off with liquidation wiping out football debts etc. Whereas your big-hearted local businessman and the council are being invited to form an orderly queue to be taken into Jimmy Savile's dressing room for special treatment. And all this to fool a judge. Again. My money is on him being fooled.

agreed in principle?.... Yeah, that's a done deal! And I'm not sure how being asked to find twice as much as you wanted to pay can be regarded as a funding boost. That'll be a national paper that has no grasp nor interest in the fine detail. Are they trying to say that they have been joined by further property developers thus complicating their future ownership structure even more? And that's a good thing? Sounds like nothing more than last minute bluster to buy more time from the judge.

pity they couldn't match Luton's points penalty, they really should have smashed that total long ago.

They say the follow up is often not as good as the original but the recent annual summer comedies from the Fatpipes Travelling Theatre Company have been excellent in different ways. Cotterill's chaotic US tour was like a remake of Airplane, and as well-judged as the time that my Auntie's friend said yes to a backstage invite at Top of the Pops - but UnAppy's National Lampoon-inspired Gibraltan farce was just as funny. It ticked all the right boxes - it shafted a local businessman reinforcing the award-winning club's contempt for the local community, it was a free training camp to help elderly and lost players to find other clubs, and it also saw pompey humiliated on the pitch. That great pompey hero UnAppy has the Midas touch, everywhere he goes people bask in reflected glory. He made Blackpool look like Brazil, Blackburn will be sure to storm up the league under his inspired guidance, and of course he did a fantastic job against all the odds at pompey. People told him he couldn't keep them up, critics mocked his inability and inexperience and said it would cost them points, but one of the country's brightest young management prospects proved them all wrong! He took a bunch of overpaid individuals and he expertly wrote their names down on a teamsheet, sometimes twice a week, and in a different order. Who can forget those battling Churchillian speeches delivered in his Nan's front room? But his legacy is often underestimated. There are many heroes who have played vital roles in their great story, pompey wouldn't be in this fantastic place without the foundations laid by Storrie, Redknapp, Grant, Lampitt and all those other great businessmen, but UnAppy is the guy who has taken them to a new level, and that shouldn't be overlooked. When he arranged that holiday (that like all previous tours didn't cost the club a single penny) it wasn't just a chaotic waste of cash that flicked V's in the face of charities and creditors, it was the start of something very special. He may have paid over the odds for battling troops, but he left in place a squad with a quality that should get them out of this division at the first attempt. And for that we should applaud him.

Good to see UnAppy has had an immediate effect and gently pulled the handbrake on Blackburn's season. Hopefully they can now look forward to a few more midtable bore draws as they slide gently towards long ball obscurity. Though he wasn't officially in charge tonight I'm sure their glorious victory would've been put down to the famous 'Appleton effect' had Wolves been wiped out again. In a world where clowns owning football clubs is common place, Blackburn surely have the longest shoes, and the cars that fall apart more than any others.

it was funny seeing an MP's chubby little face on the TV the other night saying that the cuts being forced in the city were a disgrace and something had to be done. The bloke looked very similar to the one who was on there before, supporting a local company that had raped the local community and stolen millions of pounds from the taxpayer. He didn't seem to be sharp enough to link the loss of tax revenue to the closures of cancer wards at QA or the local prison - or perhaps he wanted to gloss over that? Maybe he's thick, or perhaps he's just a little tubby puppet that gets up and dances for votes. Go on, tuck a crossed ballot paper in his grubby blue thong...he'll say whatever you want to hear, as long as you vote for him. And of course when he or Penny say the right stuff to the ever-vigilant and questioning folk of Portsea, that makes them a pair of true-blue heroes, shuffling themselves into the corners of photoshoots.... They are right up there at the sharp end of the Pluckometer with those coaching giants Appy, Cotterill, and Avram - everyone a hero. It must be time for pompey fans to start questioning these people's records and agendas, rather than relying on Nutjobs to prompt investigations.

why would Chanrai want the club without a golden share? 1. Because he's a loan shark and they tend to like cash. 2. To annoy those who have tried to shaft him. 3. For revenge on those who abused his brother in the street. 4. To reduce his losses. 5. To control the surrounding land and open up a new revenue stream. 6. Because he so nearly fell in love with the club, but then he didn't! Looks like enough reasons to me.

it's gone quieter than Mr and Mrs Grant sat at the dinner table on their anniversary. Do pompey understand the urgency or are they gathering white flags to cover empty seats at the weekend? Judges can be dim but I'm not sure that this last minute cost-cutting effort will be enough to disguise the previous 50 weeks that Trevor and assorted managers spent cheerfully chucking creditor's cash down a black hole. Too little, too late.

Getting stronger everyday? Outgoings Birch = £9K a day plus legal fees. Club trading insolvently. HNWs putting in loans. Income. A trickle of pledges. Well I've learned something today - we must have a much better chance of signing players because we're near the bottom. It seems that the relegation battle that petrifies most people is in fact 'an attractive challenge'. World class players would much rather come to us or Reading than settle for mid-table obscurity with the likes of Liverpool or Arsenal. As for Blackpool, they need to be careful. They should only put up limited obstacles to offloading the eyebrowless one, a second refusal could be dangerous as Blackburn might think they mean it. Either way he'll always be a hero down south where he organised a free holiday for allcomers, then signed ludicrously expensive players that failed miserably and had to be offloaded in the free version of a firesale. He hasn't ushered them towards the Conference, no, no - he did amazing things despite the circumstances, none of this is his fault, he beat Saints twice and stopped us going up. Legend. Right up there with the other future England manager Cotterill.

First thought was that the penalty only appears on admin-exit so it's up to the club to time it themselves - but it is a punishment, so I can see the FL imposing it for maximum damage. If it didn't change matters at all it would seem sensible to carry it over, but they do make up the rules as they go so I wouldn't be surprised to see it imposed whenever. Then again, the points penalty looks like a distant dream. Do we think they can get out of admin this season? And if they do it should have to be before the cut-off date for admin-related penalties (March?), a rule brought in to make sure penalties actually did damage. So they could be in a pretty narrow window of opportunity to get it out of the way. Then again their plucky appeal should see it wiped off allowing them to resume that great European campaign. When I saw that claim from the club yesterday that they have the best atmosphere in world football my immediate thought was that a Nutjob had joined Liam Lawrence behind the counter, but I think they were serious... Or was it more of that famous gallows humour that they have claimed copyright on....having copied QPR's chants from the week before?

balancing income and expenditure isn't rocket surgery, Birch has played an odd game. His first priority is to his own company, have their fees reached a level where he needs most of the income that he can see, plus the PP? That would leave him with no working capital. Have the HNW individuals got cold feet? If they have any sense, yes! This blatant cost-cutting is completely out of character with the recent business history, it does suggest changes afoot. These aren't players just leaving, it's Birch sacking them, giving up on his little promotion fantasy, but something he could have done two months and several hundred thousand pounds ago. The last statement from the Trust was lower key than previous ones...have they run out of steam? I wouldn't want to get Nutjobs excited, but something's going on and it could be terminal. The sign that the game is up might be Whittingham walking, or another mass exodus from the rest of the contract renewals. Next week is likely to be VERY interesting - so cancel holidays, get your favourite Nutjob anorak on and settle in front of the computer, and ensure you have an extra large Themos of steaming Bovril to hand. I predict a further trickle of player exits as a build up to the non-event in court - but that further adjournement might be the breaking point for cashflow that Birch is trying to address.

that's going to be a bit cosy with diners and a film crew packed into a horsebrass-riddled Swift Challenger SE. Sounds like a production company cutting their budget - they can shoot the whole week in one kitchen, but tow it to a different recreation ground each night.

one day Crabman all will be revealed, and you, me, Trousers, the Gemster, mad Phil, doubting Nick and all the great Nutjobs of the world will gather together as one big dysfunctional family at the PTS thread closure party. I have that dream.... And when we do, we'll raise a glass to the months/years of our lives that we have lost on here.... I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Locks Heath the sons of former skates and the sons of former scummers will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood. I have a dream that one day even the state of Paulsgrove, a state sweltering with the heat of injustice, sweltering with the heat of oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice. I have a dream that my little Nutjob friends will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their shirts but by the content of their character. I have a dream today.... I have a dream that one day, down in Portsea, with its vicious cross-eyed toothless mythmakers, with its MP having her lips dripping with the support of vote-harvesting, tax evasion and criminality, one day right there in Somers Town, little red boys and girls will be able to join hands with little blue boys and girls as sisters and brothers, but it ends at holding hands. I have a dream today... I have a dream that one day every Hampshire valley shall be exalted, every hill and mountain shall be made low, the rough places will be made plain, and the crooked places will be made straight, and the glory of our truly one club county be revealed... For I have been to the top of Portsdown Hill....and I have looked over, and I have seen the promised land, though I did have to lean out a bit and look to the right quite a lot.

if its cones you want then Al Fahim is your man, he's got a van full of the things. If you want nuts on top then give Avram a call - but don't ask him for sauce.

another blow for the former greatest fanbase in sporting history, it seems that mighty Hastings have gone past them now. The semi-pro minnows took more than a 1,000 all the way to Middlesbrough, knocking the 'amazing' 400 to Walsall off the leaderboard. And even though Hastings aren't gobbing off about how great everyone must think they are, surely it makes them bigger and more bestest than pompey. Vengeance News The heroes of The Great FA Cup Robbery - where are they now? O'Hara. Yesterday he was given the runaround by non-league Luton, the team that was penalised for financial irregularities that were minor compared to the blatant criminality that took O'Hara to Wembley and saw him strutting around St Mary's thinking he was Pele. Yes, the tubby little midfield maestro who was resigned illegally specifically for SMS via false accounting presented to a court, was humiliated by non-league opposition, and in performing so badly he helped get another manager sacked. What's that behind you? Oh, that'll be your career! I love karma.

I note on Twitter that their fans have downgraded themselves from the bestest to some of the best. That looks like a slippery slope - otherwise known as a cliff, perhaps reality is biting. Oh no it's not! - they're still banging on about the illegal cup runs and pretending they were real. Saddos. They must be obsessed. As for us, we're just jealous - yeah, that'll be it...

Benson's a true-blue legendary hero! In the seedy world of football there is still some loyalty. Against a backdrop of cash-strapped chaos the battling star striker has turned his back on other clubs, ignored a large queue of suitors and pledged his future to the sleeping giant! 'There's only one club I want to play for' muttered the underperforming journeyman as he wheeled another barrow of cash up Frogmore Road, 'I want to stay and fight for this great shirt and fire the goals that lead the plucky blue troops to safety!' It's a story to warm your heart - a player so inspired by the faithful travelling army and great facilities that he has spurned a much larger wage offer* and stability elsewhere. But how long will it be before the official HeroVillainometer reclassifies the loyal silky-skilled frontman as a greedy carthorse bleeding the club dry? The script is now stuck on repeat. *turned down a fulltime contract elsewhere?...alarm bells...

that drivel is right up there with the Radio Solent presenter who said yesterday that with all the restrictons behind the scenes, what the club had achieved on the pitch is fantastic. Just because someone has journalist written on their business card doesn't always mean they have a clue what they are talking about. Very few media commentators have any grasp of the financial situation, how many times have we seen b0ll0x dressed up as fact, or debt amounts reported wrongly? We've even seen business journalists corrected on Twitter and having to check facts with random strangers. Half of Fleet Street doesn't realise they haven't paid a penny, because they don'ty care, and they have an agenda to write to. Thieving ba$tards buy Championship players isn't as good as plucky underdogs still fighting against the world. So for Sky to plod out this ancient spin is no great surprise. And while I'm having a little rant, could John Motson please retire. I don't want the games scripted like Emmerdale, I just want it to unfold, just let me watch it with some informed commentary. But no - when he puts his words on the images later and starts saying, well Spurs haven't conceded a goal in the first fifteen minutes this season, let's see what happens here...it's pretty bloody obvious what little storyline he is preparing us for. Ditto when we get a shot of a player at a corner and the sheepskin-clad has-been announces that this former player is yet to score against his old club, you don't need to be Einstein to work out what's coming. He's catering for the thickest people and trying to guide them through a soap opera. Football doesn't have to be like drama, we don't need the formula of goodies, baddies and plot twists. The game does that on it's own without commentators trying to spice it up or create subplots for cretins. So Sky, and the BBC - put a new record on, your little playlist is so last century, and devoid of facts. And that thicko on the FL show - how many cliches do we need to hear in one summing up?? He's not that type of player, yes he is, he just did it! They'll bounce back for sure, will they? He lacked belief - no, he lacked the technical skill that the moment demanded! They didn't get the rub of the green, and my favourite from when Reading equalised against Arsenal at 5-5. This Reading side just doesn't know when it's beaten!! Well they did two goals later. But they didn't defend badly through loose marking, lack of pace or poor positional play, no, Arsenal just wanted it more and got the rub of the green to go with their belief.

that big greedy blue beast is still sucking up ca$h at an alarming rate. It's as if Birch knows how much is due from PPs and he's timing it to bale out as soon as his fees and the pointless legal battle costs can no longer be covered. And all the Trust can do is wave goodbye to next year's working capital - another court delay is a minor disaster, or as they described it last time, a glorious victory. While the generous but jittery local businessmen wave goodbye to their 'loans', and any chance of seeing them again. This revolutionary 'play the kids' scheme is at least three years too late - the fricking horse's grandchildren have escaped from the stable, and pompey still haven't ordered a door, let alone the fittings! The scabby blue beast has been terminally and horribly sick for a decade - for god's sake will someone PLEASE put a bolt gun through it's face. It might be briefly messy, but it's the only humane thing to do.

the last time they went this quiet before the court date we thought they had something really clever up their sleeves. They didn't. Having heard Farmery on Solent last night I see no reason to expect some case-winning revelation to sweep them to victory. He thinks a new court date will be set, possibly end of Jan or into Feb. I expect nothing to be sorted before the end of the transfer window other than rich businessmen becoming reluctant to cover losses, little progress on the pitch, and the only positive from their point of view will be the occasional noise made through their chosen media partners. the Trust bid is right on track, we are ready to take control, despite being 3,000 people a game, one division, and £10M short of our own ambitious projections....

and the leading entry in the Steve Cotterill Award for the most ridiculous post-defeat quote of 2013 goes to heroic potential villian Lee Willamson, with this little Swindon gem - We were the better team for an hour and then, all of a sudden, we were 5-0 down. Yeah, it's the sort of thing you get quite often in football - I recall how Villa were all over Chelsea until the blues slotted in eight goals, and then it looked a different game. It was the same when we went to the Emirates, we bossed the game all over the park and even had more kicks-off than Arsenal, but we didn't get the rub of the green. Williamson is also entered in the Understatement of the Season category with We’ve had a bit of a bad run... But about the whole fans love-in thing, can we just clarify a few facts. I realise that pompey have no reason to discuss on the pitch stuff but let's get back to reality as I sense that fickle old mistress delusion creeping back into the spin about the fans. Facts Like most clubs in their position, their home attendances have been quite poor. The rallying cry to pack the park was a disaster. Like most fans, they have booed when players are rubbish Their away following is smaller than many teams - it has been appalling on several occasions. Both their attendances and away followings have been nowhere near our own when in the third tier. EVERY fanbase resorts to humour when the score has become a joke. EVERY fanbase gets patted on the head for staying in the ground by teams that have hammered them. And two more special bestest related facts - The Trust bid is still a property deal, not a fan buyout - and it isn't the first by a long way. So why are we still hearing the spin? We make no claims to being special, or the bestest, normal clubs don't. The likes of Utd, Celtic, Newcastle, Liverpool - they are big clubs with away followings that create atmospheres. Nige always bigs up the SMS crowd and yes we do get behind the team, but I wouldn't imagine we are much better or worse than other 30K grounds. We've taken over some small grounds in the past but I didn't hear anyone saying that as a result we are bigger than Boca Juniors. Yet the very few continue to spout mindless drivel - these statements are nothing more than myths for the hard-of-thinking to lap up. Persisting with this 'look at us we're special' policy just makes the unpacked park even funnier, and means that bigger clubs like Brighton, Crawley, and Bournemouth can join in the game called laugh at the deluded bloke. Time to button it - rather than gobbing off like a wino being moved on, maybe they should maintain a dignified silence as they gently slip into the 4th tier.

Well at least they've started the new year with better form. But in their defence, with that run of form they've done well to stay in touch - they should be ten points adrift at the bottom. Though I believe the Football League can still organise that for them if required. I haven't heard Connolly say that they are the best fans he's ever played in front of - presumably some mischievous local media will try and coax that out of him sometime soon. Have we returned to that point where mocking seems cruel? Though I do find that the sympathetic feeling fades a little everytime I hear a further version of a mythical docks strike or Nazi story. All in all the very few have a lot to look forward to...

so they didn't even want him but they had to nick him because he wasn't bolted down? That can't be right, Toyboy kept telling us they had no problems at all before 5pm on cup final day 2008 - so that trophy wasn't illegally obtained. I wonder how he is? - I hope Christmas was kind to his little shop. I miss his madness and delusion - though he'd be disappointed that Micah Hall has also proved him wrong on all counts. Happy days - someone go dig out the best of Ho, like the original Ted statue it's a must for cheering up a gloomy day.

With Portpin now teetering on the brink of defeat, the wages under control, income up, Birch having finished his work, and the Trust about to take the keys, this would seem a good time to close this thread. The new year is a natural break after all, a time for us to accept that the dirty sister of all takeovers has completed, bar the rubber-stamping, and that 2013 will be the year that they bounce back. Personally I'll be sad to see the end of this golden era, I may even display my feelings through constructive booing - not disloyal or ignorant booing, just supportive justified booing. And if you Nutjobs were proper passionate plucky bestest football fans, you would know the difference - though I would imagine we'll all be home by 7pm today as we'll leave at halftime, booing as we go - and not in the good way that has just been invented.