rallyboy

£5M? They can have Fox for that - and we'll throw in a few cones and some balls. We've already established with Arsenal that the going rate for an undeveloped talent is £12M. If they want to buy our regular first team player, with at least ten years of top flight football ahead of him, they'll need to find £18M+. I'm sure that Nicola can tell them where to go with the disdain he normally reserves for agents desperately trying to offload 30-something journeymen onto naive chairmen.

Draft Press Release. A New Year, a fresh start, and a chance for the brave old girl to shrug off the dirty criminals and seedy chancers who have sullied the fine name of the top club this side of London. And if the supporters do take control of the tiller and guide the proud old ship to safety on an ever-swelling river of dreams, it will be a shining beacon for lesser clubs to follow - a small blue light of opportunity to guide them from the darkness of insolvency, a light held bravely, and shining not just across Portsea, but lighting the whole of the UK. pompey supporters will be showing football a new way, the most passionate supporters in the land will be taking smaller less passionate clubs by the hand and ushering them into a new era for the world game. So in 2013 pompey could become the first fan-owned club in the world, but there are one or two minor stumbling blocks. People associated with the club have in the past committed crimes, that has never been denied, Micah Hall has pioneered research and uncovered irregularities, it has taken detective work by pompey fans to bring this to the attention of the press. It's not the first time the fans have stood up for justice - let's not forget how the bitter Premier League was forced into a U-turn after mass demonstrations by the faithful, and how the recent glorious adjournement was only secured when a minibus of protesters gridlocked the capital and made the world take notice. But there have been no crimes committed by the club itself, only by people who had portsmouth FC on their business cards at the time of their crimes, and who were controlling club money and celebrating on the field success at Fratton Park. Some of the so-called crimes were just unfortunate timing, a bank calling in a loan, the world recession, all things that have occurred have mainly been bad luck. So plucky old pompey is cleared of all charges, but there are other minor rubber-stamping issues to deal with if that proud beacon of hope is to be sparked and lit by the flints of ambition. The evil league continues to threaten yet another ridiculous points penalty, even though the club has already been punished. Hopefully the challenge to that ruling will see justice done. The creditors are happy, the charities have been paid, the club has cleared debts that were not even owed by them, but nasty Portpin still insist on a payoff. But there is no money, the club has been bled-dry by evil hangers on - all that remains in the current account is the passion and loyalty of the famous blue army - worth more than gold. The club now has the lowest wagebill in the history of world football, the transfer embargo means that the club cannot pay players anything at all. All of the current brave troops are paying for their own hotels because they know what an honour it is to run out in front of a packed Fratton Park. Whether those draconian restrictions have made the league unfair is for others to debate. All the club asks is for a chance to compete on a level playing field, currently it is not fair - but you don't see the players moaning, they just defiantly get on with it, racking up win after win and silencing the doubters. And this has all happened because of things beyond the control of the football club, but the guilty have been rightly chased out of town by the plucky Portsea people. The criminals have long gone, leaving behind only the echoes of despair and the bitter tears of the past, but when gathered with the warmth of the community, this combination could germinate a seed of belief. Battles may be lost but the city was built on sterner stuff - the people lost, but they never lost belief. Let's not forget the famous dock strike when neighbouring cities stole work and scab workers ate babies. Did pompey the city give in? No they stood as one, defiant and proud, with dirt on their hands, springs in their steps, and hope in their hearts. So when the gentle spring tides wash that solitary seed onto a beach warmed by the first thin sun of 2013, the fresh greenshoot that emerges could grow into a sturdy sapling which could then be fashioned by those loyal supporters into a baton of hope - a baton that they can proudly carry forward and plant as a defiant flagpole for the future. But before that seed of hope can be planted, the supporters have to satisfy Portpin and see off their ridiculous valuation of the ground. Hopefully a judge will see sense and side with the good guys, but the club has been so harshly treated by the courts and the football authorities of late that there may be another battle to win. It will be a battle for the very ground that Avram stood on when he made his famous rousing speech, the turf on which Dickinson strolled, the grass that Quinn glided across, the very mud that a charity cheque was bounced upon. Alan Knight may have laid on that ground sobbing like a girl as Moran wheeled away, but he never surrendered, he didn't know when he was beaten, and it's that spirit that will be needed for the challenges of 2013. 2012 was a good year for pompey with a glorious last-minute draw at St Marys, continuity in the dugout and on the pitch, firm consolidation just outside the Premier League, progress behind the scenes, but this fresh launch platform for a return to European competition mustn't be wasted. The Trust is ready to bankroll the club back to glory right now, the squad is up for the fight, the fans are packing the park, we just need the judge to make the right call and 2013 could see pompey right back where they belong. ends

once a year someone wanders in and tells us that the goings-on down east are not interesting. The last one slagging off Saints fans on here used the term 'nutjobs' and it was embraced - I don't think they came back. Sometimes people who don't live near the border or who haven't had to suffer the deluded myths don't understand the thrill of watching vengeance being served up in the Karma Cafe Look at the balance sheet, the Trust manifesto, the court schedules, and the league table. What is there not to like, you fricking nutjobs?

that is a tough result to take - beaten at home by your local rivals as they head up and you head down. They're coming for you, they're coming for you - Aldershot and Eastleigh are coming for you!.... No, that can't be right, pompey are a massive club, one of the biggest in Europe with a fanbase that dwarfs the likes of Rangers, Newcastle and Liverpool. They are the most special fans, that's why players come to Fatpipes instead of going to minnows like Spurs and Celtic - I keep hearing and reading that, the fans who never give up supporting the sleepiest giant in the world. The tables must be wrong. It's that nasty league rewriting the results and sending emails to refs, yeah, that's the answer.

merry christmas you jealous Nutjobs - let it go, it's over, they are fine. Here's to a liquidation-dodging 2013 of even more comedy management and delusion at all levels within, and associated with, the sleepiest giant and plucky minnow formerly known as pompey - and of course that mighty blue army that fills every ground on it's plucky bestest myth-spreading travels. x

If they want to start next season in admin I think it' ll be in a different sport. There are five things that will always happen in this world. Life, death, tax evasion, the minus ten - and the fact that Chinny will do everything in his power to get his money, he is secured. pompey have had a very poor 2012. I see no indication that 2013 will be any better, it could well be much worse. They are in a relegation battle to the bottom tier of league football and they have a business model that is based on insolvent trading, at some point soon they will have to stop spending money, or close. But the Trust will save them Rallyboy you Nutjob... The Trust clearly have no answers to their predicament, they are currently in negotiations to buy a dead horse so they can win the Grand National on it. Which reminds me, there are another two things that remain constant in life - the figures don't add up, and the only answer is cash. Not loans, not property deals, semi-pledges or half-promises, just cash, loads of it, on the table - now. Oh, and Trev's ever-escalating bill, there's another thing....

we have won games recently despite shocking refs, yet I'm happy to come away from that dismal defeat and say that Webb was just head and shoulders above some of the clowns we have had to suffer. Though I didn't agree with everything he did, his control of the game was all you would ask of any ref - fair, and if you were rating EVERYONE on that pitch, I suspect he would be right up in the top three performers. He spotted a subtle foul early on that indicated that he knew what he was doing, he needs to go train a few of his comical colleagues - Clattenberg should try and learn from this guy. Bring on the next clown.

let's not forget that Harry cannot type, text or read, and has never been involved in negotiating the financial aspect of any transfer. All of his signings have been a great success, he has never saddled any clubs with future debt for short term gain, he has never lost money on property deals because his judgement was blinded by greed, and the legion of rumours that follow him didn't cost him the England job. And the Spurs job. And the West Ham job. But if you are in trouble before Christmas he is the man who can keep you up. Whereas his sticky-pawed dog is capable of setting up foreign bank accounts, booking flights to Monaco online, organising international money transfers that seem designed to evade tax, exchanging texts with David Beckham, and giving her owner free rein when it comes to making implausible public statements. Next thing we know the thieving little ***** will be telling us that her owner's not a wheeler dealer. I can think of no one more suited to being relegated instead of us. This voluntary paycut he is about to take, to shame his own players, will be one of the most noble things he has ever done.

great work H. Some little gems in there. So much criminality and delusion to cram into one festive season! And anyone buying the calendar should know that all proceeds will be stolen from a selection of local charities and spent on shiny tat.

it wasn't Dr Grant was it? You wake up in his chair and get home to find your pants on back to front. But he was right about one thing, your jaw did ache the next day...

the 4-1 in that season referred to four fake owners and one billionaire. As for Wiltshire Police stopping pompey taking more that 1,000 to Swindon, that would make sense as they are way too passionate, bestest and noisy for mere mortals to cope with, and some of the home players as well as all officials will be overawed by playing in such a hostile atmosphere, it wouldn't be fair. It sounds like Walsall away will be like a television reconstruction of World Cup 78 too - we just need Kempes and another 120,000 sheets of shredded A4 and the image will be complete. It's all gone a bit sad and deluded - a little club on the slide that refuses to accept that it is now even smaller than the likes of Crawley and Stevenage, and in PR they still pretend to be bigger than Exeter. Some of you are just plain cruel.

that'll be the same Kanu who is currently Mr December in the now trail-blazing panto-style annual Calendar of Villains.

Glitterati -do you want to be in their gang, their gang, their gang? No thanks. For so many reasons. Any business venture that relies on an inititial enthusiasm will have a big surge in income followed by a steady decline. If they start off slightly underfunded and then get further stretched AND engaged in a protracted legal battle I would suggest their outgoings will increase roughly as fast as their income decreases. They now form a perfect graph - their income and outgoings must be heading in different directions at an alarming rate. But the 12th man tells us the bid has never been stronger, and no one from Portsea has ever made anything up so it must be true. The truth is they have a shortfall to cover so they need new pledges every day. BUT, they also need new pledges to cover the legal fees and the local hero businessmen's loans. I cannot see how they can produce enough funds, and with every new day, the trickle of pledges slows but the target gets higher. But they are doing great... Facts are the Portsea Ferrero Rocher - a luxury, only to be introduced on very special occasions.

careful pikeyjosh, you're through the bottom of the barrel and that's the floor you're scraping. Are you watching it loud because your big webbed fingers can't steal from dying children, fondle your sister, and operate the remote control at the same time? It might be a waste of fuel but get the opentop bus out again, a clean sheet again the legendary Preston is worth a ticker tape parade, that's if you didn't use it all up celebrating that fantastic courtroom success - and if you have run out of ticker tape you can always shred printouts of the league table and rewrite history as you go! Just when you think deluded is an overused word they jump straight into it again. Give it another year and that'll be recorded as a league double over the scummahs, the 6pts that sent us down and assured their safety. Once again a scabby homeless tramp is mocking our 6-bed house.

McInnes was quite clear on the radio this morning that the 'investors' are now having to put money in not to just cover the overpaying of wages, but to cover the ongoing legal bills. It might not be their court case but they are obviously picking up the tab - Trev ain't dim. And when Al Fahim gets on Twitter to give you financial advice you know you are in trouble. The man can't even order himself a shirt the correct size, I don't think I'll be too worried about his little chiming van of cornets rolling up to save them, even as a Chinny frontman. But the legal fees must be crippling them, nothing sucks up capital like a legal case and when you have a big hole in your projections, the last thing you need is an adjournement. The big plucky blue money beast is still feeding!

the last time the phrase stop tempting me trousers I can't resist was heard, it was in Avram's Grant's head when the craggy one's juices started flowing and the voices started arguing with each other. Thankfully he let it all spill out, so to speak, when someone gave him a microphone and he vocalised his madness. I think it's pretty clear from their attendances that the famous unbreakable spirit that he assured us would last a thousand generations, actually broke within a fortnight. That was his famous rivers of fat speech.* *there is another version of this sentence available after the watershed.

Firstly the hospital thing... Being a tad cynical the first thing I did when I saw that 'Saints' had visited the hospital was to check out the photo to see who had gone - I was impressed! These gigs often end up with the same handful of players having to cover them, ours was a great turn out. Yes the pompey players are on monthly contracts, but they are being paid VERY well - so four is a feeble showing and just gives cynical nutjobs an easy tap in. Secondly, as they have just been caught out telling fibs yet again, would someone from pfc like to explain why they have been persistently economic with the truth for the last few years? We have the lowest wages, we haven't outbid anyone - whoops, we seem to be insolvent! Even though the fans had to be thicker than the contents of a Fratton wastepipe to gobble up all the spin and the lies, that is no justification for misleading them - it must be time for an apology, and perhaps some transparency going forward. Other managers pointed out the overpaying, pompey denied it - the ongoing losses show it was true. It's a bit much when you have to rely on a rival fan's forum to give you the actual facts.

HNW individuals funding the business?? That can't be right, that would mean that pompey are overpaying wages to gain a competitive advantage, trading insolvently, and were being secretly bailed out by property developers on the offchance that they'll make a killing. And all of that has been denied in the past so that claim by the Trust must be wrong. If it were true it would mean that they really are addicted to insolvency and beyond cure. And the HNW individuals perhaps need to be relabelled individuals. I can see those suckers going the same way as the bloke who paid for Appy's holiday. Put money in, wave it goodbye. Does that mean 11 weeks = £1M loss? That's quite a burn rate for a company that has already made redundancies and slashed overheads. So to compete at the bottom of League One they will operate at a loss of £5M a year. The best thing to come out of yesterday was that all those mad Nutjob claims about overspending, outbidding Championship clubs and inflated wages were spot on. They really only have one thing of value left in that whole sorry mess, but all parties are circling... Birch is spending them in advance, the property developers want them, the Trust is wholly reliant on them, the former players are owed them, but Chinny will trouser them! - the final parachute payments are the only thing keeping the sick beast alive. After the £8M payout, there is no future. They can gather the family, get Bono in to wail an acoustic number, and switch off the machine.

so did they get the keys?... if that was a glorious victory then I'm going to get us promotion only using reluctant academy players shoe-horned into a Total Football system reminiscent of Ajax in the 1970s.... Sounds like they have a month to find another property developer who wants to empty his bank account without delay. Can't see this victory helping the promotion push. A handful of fans acting like animals outside the high court is always great PR as well - I'm sure it was passion rather than abuse that was being spouted in the street. If that was a good day it demonstrates how crap life must be to the east.

even as they stare into the abyss, the spin keeps on churning out of Fatpipes Arena.... Pompey have been warned they will be facing a side lifted by the prospect of playing at Fratton Park tomorrow. Caretaker boss Guy Whttingham believes teams are upping their games when they travel to meet the Blues. He said: ‘We need to get over the hurdle of playing at Fratton Park, where teams see it as a place they are lifted. ‘We have to prepare for a Preston side looking forward to playing at Fratton because of the atmosphere it creates. ‘The opposition want to come and do well because of the history of the club. Yeah, little Preston, a team with no history, fired up because they get to play against one of the historic giants of world football in a packed stadium! Poor little pompey are suffering because refs and now players regard a day in their city as a cup final. A staggering bit of PR flying in the face of facts. They need to get real - and soon, in fact in about five hours time, because they could be in for a shock.

the club future hangs by a thread yet only one family makes the trip to court. Perhaps Justice 'closing down' Sales will put the poor sick beast out if it's misery tomorrow. Though a 28 day course of painkillers costing £250K seems more likely. The reporting from court is amusing but I miss those funny articles about players who want to turn Fatpipes into a fortress and how some random Barnet reject knew there was only one club he wanted to go to after he had 90 letters of rejection, yes, the biggest sleepiest undeveloped giant in the world where packed crowds frighten refs....please get Avram to make another funny speech on the court steps, and if he can't do that he could accuse Chanrai of misleading the judge. If anyone can make it stand up in court it'll be their favourite uncle. For those reasons alone we need them to survive - for what would we become if we didn't have people to look down on? Well, technically we'd be QPR, but you know what I mean.

and we were thinking that it was the Trust who were the poor relations of the deal, looks like their £1M will buy them full control - of nothing in particular. IF Robinson is potless, as a property developer I'm sure he can raise some funding for a deal that might net him a couple of million. I reckon he must have a few million squirreled away, but if he hasn't, what sort of person is likely to take a punt and lend him money at an alarming interest rate?.... Though that interest rate will rise a percent with every abusive comment in the courtroom corridors. The high court is definitely their second home now, could even be their first home soon. Has the nasty league restricted their support squad to 14? That is unfair. With all that's going on today I can see why they think we are all jealous.

we moved pretty quickly from the tubthumping 'Chanrai knows the game is up and has had to settle' to 'PKF have realised that their case is falling apart'. Perhaps the truth is somewhere in between, but closer to the latter! The court won't be interested in some random bloke in the public gallery spouting off about what he could do if appointed administrator, surely any Portpin gripe with Birch is irrelevant to the land case? Ditto Birch and the Trust funding. He doesn't care how much they've got, his job is to deliver the ground for £2.75M - it's up to them after that. If he gets his adjournment then I reckon the PDT deadline for being in full control of the club before Christmas might be getting a little bit tight... But on a brighter note, plenty more fees draining out of plucky Guy's promotion warchest. Trev's family will do alright on Christmas day - I bet he kept himself one of those blue Santa suits - yes kids, pompey paid for all of this! Anyone for more swan?

Hurrah! The guns have stopped, the battle has been won! The big knobs have got around the table and yanked the big iron out of the fire.... Or perhaps Team Chinster has just eased the handbrake on and is watching the PDT's legal fees creeping up faster than little Avram at a Baywatch convention. If the Football League firing a warning shot at them the other day could be spun as a vote of confidence, then I'm sure this delay is fantastic news. Unless you had booked a Matiz to carry the blue army up there. Yes that's it, fan power has forced the court to have a rethink, the biggest fan buyout has proved too much for Justice Sales to cope with, we need a more important judge who can cope with the pressure of the best club in the world - the thought of that massive crowd with all of their banners bringing central London to a standstill proved too much. I bet the Met asked for a new date when they heard about the bookshop van full of porn, grass, and a chemical toilet heading their way.... Come on Penny, come on beardie, tell us what you think about this latest success, and how you did your bit to blaze a trail that will lead football into a new age (even those clubs that have done it already).....this rubber-stamping exercise is less hassle than we thought, it'll be a matter of minutes before they get the keys and ride off into the sunset. FANtastic!! yawn. And on a funnier note - anyone else seen the pompey 2012 calendar? - guess who Mr December is?.... Sadly not Ben Haim - but Kanu! He's appeared just before the court case to remind them about his claim.

one of the historic issues is being highlighted again this week by those wishing to dodge the penalty. They want to criminalise former owners and let them take the rap for all wrongdoing, but they'd like to keep the cup. You cannot distance 'the club' from the crimes, nor the fans - unless of course they were a lone voice of protest outside Wembley? I 4-1 would like them to admit that their only honest game in recent years was Plymouth away. They can keep that result.