rallyboy

best thing about the playoffs is that I have no interest in them. Thank god we avoided that lottery, imagine our whole season boiling down to us desperately trying to get a late late goal against MK Dons or similar - it's been great today without that hassle!

Mack me old mucker, you do trade sensible banter on occasions and you do accept that we think you all fiddle with your sisters and badly tarmac old ladies' drives for cash - but I do sometimes look at your postings and wonder what language they are in. Was that a borderline racist attack on one of your own players, disguised only by the fact that you got your pet chimp to google translate it from Skate into semi-English? Though it's always nice to see the rarely spotted quadruple consecutive comma formation. So we like that you come on here with generally realistic banter but we're worried about your state of mind - it all looks a bit frenzied...in future calm down before you punch the keyboard.

he has two years to go, that amounts to costing the business about £5M - or half of their entire wages budget if the club was run sensibly. He can't get those crazy wages anywhere else so presumably they'll have to find £2M to pay him off - that's if someone takes him.

Don't knock Marlon King, everyone deserves a 14th chance. Who releases every player they can - unless it is purely about cost-cutting? The spin says please buy season tickets because we have new owners, while the facts suggest there is still a massive financial problem that needs addressing now. While the few sink and the red tide rises, let's hope Mack doesn't see Cortese's master plan as quoted by our new scout supremo - it has everything that Corp Ho claimed was going to happen to them - apart from the Harbourdome, Maradona and Eto obviously! I won't get too excited about the Champions League just yet! Let's get out of the championship first, and that's not going to be as easy as some people think. WARNING - do your own punchlines gag appraching - If they hang onto Cotterill I still reckon pompey can get out of this division before we can.

Pompey are to join a ground-breaking scheme offering young talents the chance to make a name for themselves in the futsal world. The Blues are to give aspiring players the opportunity to join their all-new futsal and education scholarship. The Blues are one of eight sides in the south chosen to compete in the league alongside Exeter, Bristol City, Plymouth, Cardiff, Bristol Rovers, Cheltenham and Reading. Former Blues favourite Paul Hardyman, now head of sports and coaching at the Pompey Sports & Education Foundation, believes it is an exciting development for the club. ‘We’re delighted we’ve been chosen to be involved and it’s a bonus we were picked above Southampton as well! Yes Mr Hardyman of course you were picked above Southampton, because you are so special! - alongside those other galactico-producing, coaching giants Cheltenham, Plymouth and Exeter - Wenger is always down at Cheltenham keeping an eye on his next target, trying to make sure Liverpool don't beat him to it. Nicola has missed a trick there, I bet he wishes we had an after school club too rather than an internationally-respected academy. Just more spin for the few to lap up.

funny thing Mack is that it really wasn't as painful as you think, especially when we discovered that half your team was illegal! It was just nice to make your entire fanbase come to St Marys and face a wall of noise. If that frightened them they are in for a real shock next season, there is a proper atmosphere home and away now. I remember Swindon gave a better showing than the few that season, we were slightly disappointed by the silence of the fish. Anyway Hypo's right, getting stuffed at Fratton, that was bad, but losing to a team two divisions above you that you outplayed for an hour? No. But as a result I do follow your favourite Uncle Avram's career with great interest, he was the dirty old man who went on our pitch to celebrate and discovered it was difficult to run with crusty grey Y-fronts around your ankles - he looked like he was heading for a semi then. I greatly look forward to his next sacking - should be very soon, should have bought in January but that's always been his problem, never knowing when he should splash out or not. You can't take his spirit!! But you can have three points anytime you want, the West Ham buffet is always open, help yourself. But hot on the heels of all the 4-1 talk, I think I'll stick with the reminder - four broke owners v one billionaire though it sounds like you might be making that 5-1 quite soon.

Most likely outcome for the summer? - Liquidation investigation discovers no evidence of malpractice though does suggest that irregularities and missing documents have hampered investigation. Former directors warned of their future conduct, AA criticised in strong terms - no action taken. Most tax charges thrown out, Storrie found guilty so club warned of future conduct and fined a tenner - they don't pay, pausing briefly to flick the V's in the taxman's face as they leave court. The few protest vehemently about ward closures at QA due to tax shortfalls, but see no connection. They also deny Storrie's charges have anything to do with the club. New owners come in without investment and add yet more borrowing to the crippled business, becoming the 3rd or 4th party to use Fratton Park as security - it now has a value on paper of £80M. The CVA is further delayed when the Russians discover it exists. Lawrence ironically demands more player recruitment while taking the pay of four. They bring in players other championship teams cannot afford, poaching several from under the noses of Prem teams. The wages v income equation still doesn't stack up. The campaign to bring in the recently sacked Avram Grant fizzles out when it's discovered he wants paying. Lampitt and Cotterill talk up the season, no one believes them. Many continue to feel they have got away with it. A Russian poses for the press wearing a pompey shirt over a bullet-proof vest. The small creditors continue to wait. New washing machines are delivered. Harry is seen at Fratton. It starts to finally dawn on the big creditors that they will never get paid. The club survives the summer and looks to have turned a corner - new owners, new squad, all looks rosy. But those wages days just keep on coming every month and the income can't keep up, especially when the small print shows Chanrai's ludicrous payback terms and the Russians discover the parachute money is already accounted for. And where those Russians go, Interpol follows - and how come the ground was half empty but the attendance was 20,000? Odd. But bestest of all while all this goes on, the few know that there's a 4-1 drubbing out there with their name on it. Tis their destiny.

most calamitous mistake - Puncheon's decision to take on Nige and Nicola. best five mins of the season - 1. Brighton away! 2. injury time v MK Dons. We were hanging on to an amazing turnaround - they threw everything at us and it was the moment I realised that the team really had steel and resolve. Lallana chased everything and Barnard ran the ball half the length of the field to make it safe - we looked like proper promotion candidates. A defining few minutes that said everything would be alright. worst damage to property due to over-celebrating - 1. half my sunglasses, Barnard v Orient. 2. phone bouncing out of pocket and on to the Northam concrete, Chaplow v Man Utd

wonder which of the pompey predictions will happen first, Matt leads the Russian consortium to a takeover, or Lambert agrees terms with Cotterill - difficult to judge. I'd be surprised if Norris signs yet as they seem keen at the moment to reduce the wagebill to zero until they have income, and he'll be wanting £20K a week as that is the level they have set. Even clubs in serious financial trouble have been able to afford summer wages, any club that needs to postpone new signings until the middle of August is a business on a knife edge. So those alarm bells are ringing again - luckily the few can stick fingers in their ears and still have enough free to count into double figures.

he'll do well to bankrupt Spurs but I think he's giving it a good go. They now have a Champions League wagebill with Carling Cup income to look forward to. I would imagine their business plan involves some big borrowing for the new stadium and a reliance on increased gates to finance it. A dip in form and attendances could be disastrous. Then again West Ham have that scenario tied up already - they have the look of the classic Prem team that has gambled on big wages and is heading for a big wakeup call - firesale, wage restructuring, sacked manager, fighting for their lives in the championship. That is a business on a knife edge and needing six points from two games - as is Wigan. Blackpool and Wolves look to have more sensible planning behind them.

things have changed since Theo - 1. we are now in a much stronger position to offer these players competitive football, 2. we can afford to negotiate hard and Nicola doesn't take prisoners, 3. Arsenal are becoming a less attractive move with every passing week. Do come talk to us Arsene (if you think you still have the backing of the board), but there are no more cut price deals for cash. We intend to be playing against Arsenal in the next two/three years and when that day comes we would prefer the youngsters to be playing for us rather than sitting on your bench.

He's vowed to clear the debt by ignoring it, so just a continuation of all previous owner's business plans! I'm not sure we've had official notice that this guy has passed a FaPPT other than from him, but if he does despite failing miserably to satisfy the financial world, it will be ridiculous. Though when the football authorities can allow QPR to drive a bus through their regulations, nothing surprises me. On the back of that I see little hope of justice being properly served for the financial shenanigans down the road but what I would say is the fans need to be vocal NOW on the prospect of a potential takeover by a man who was too dodgy for Bournemouth, couldn't provide funds for Rangers, and is considered by the UK financial system to be connected to organised crime and money laundering. If a fanbase cares about the state of their club, now is the time for the few to make a noise. But if a dodgy Russian takeover is welcomed we will see once again that the whole club is morally bankupt. As well as being properly bankrupt. Do the fans want to save their club, or do they still just want results at any cost? Sorry, stupid question. Meanwhile the local businesses that were given personal guarantees by the club owner last year over £2,500 debts still wait by the letterbox. How much longer can this criminal farce go on? In the close season can we help them with a simple hearing to see why things haven't improved? Chanrai - why make hollow promises to pay? Lampitt - how can you allow this to continue? And how do you intend to negotiate new sensible contracts after offering huge ones this season? Cotterill - no questions, cleared of all charges - please stay, we think you're doing a great job - get rid of more youngsters, pay more for loanees, and try that quality over quantity again, it just needs fine tuning! Storrie - no questions, please come back to get the finances 'sorted'.

Hi Daren, I hope the pix I took for you on your phones are alright. And thank the guys for firing elastic bands at me in the second half!

I think we just gave Brighton a lesson in how to finish a season - they're lucky they won the title in the first seven games as they haven't matched ourselves and huddersfield since January, despite both of us losing key players, and when it came to the crunch games they couldn't give an honest account of themselves for teams at either end of the table. Their massive domination actually turned into us coming up one game short, and I bet that annoys Nige - no doubt he'll put that right next season. Great day, and as Giger points out, the celebratory moments are often a time when you remember relatives/friends who are no longer with us, but they would certainly have enjoyed yesterday! - must have been a tough but proud day for Nicola. I have never seen so many people on a pitch, and I have never seen so many proper football shirts in Fareham, are pompey still trading? They seem to have disappeared.

most concerning aspect of this is that he came out to punch something and missed it. Bad decision making or just technically inept?

they would be buying a club without any debt??.... So Chanrai is taking responsibility for the cva, arms dealer etc? - that'll be an asking price of approx £60M then - or the price of two Prem clubs. Nearly as funny as 8,000 season tickets already sold - yeah right, and new pompey player manager Ricky Lambert will be leading the team out at the Maradona Harbourdome in August. Storrie must be back in charge of the figures.

Presumably Cotterill has no power to do anything regarding new players as - a.the business is for sale and it's reckless to take on new contracts. b.the current owner doesn't want to spend anything. So why is he even pretending? Oh yes, the old season ticket sales scam! Look at us, everything is great, no really, no problems at all, new squad, promotion push, please for god's sake can someone pay next month's wages??!!... Unless they complete a deal a bit sharpish they are will be in a worse state than they were last summer - at least he has his US holiday once again at the taxpayer's expense.

excellent and well deserved. And let's just bury this myth that Saints always falter. We have been under massive pressure for three months - have we been shipping last minute goals, wobbling as soon as the oppostion get at us? No way. MK Dons threw everything at us but we didn't crack - we battled, players out on their feet fought for the points and an exhausted Barnard ran to Woolston with the ball. We are no longer that weak team, our award-winning manager has created a winning mentality.

Must be the same architect as Chanrai's, it looks like the initial design for the fence around Fratton Heights - The forthcoming development of 230 luxury apartments and 30 retail units - with of course a small bit of land put aside for 'leisure use'. But to satisfy the disgruntled few they'll paint the railings blue, so that's nice. Or should that be Fratton Depths.....either way, weather permitting, it's opening summer 2012!

surely Ladysaint takes the prize only missing the one - a 6-0 away win - plastic! That's better than doing the lot, it shows that you can still have one regret in a fantastic season.

and the funniest rumour ever made up on The News site? Is it the Saints are in massive debt and Cortese is trying to offload them because they don't even own the ground - always a funny one if you believe everything you hear from a wino on a park bench. No, it's todays breaking news that the mate of a bloke down pompey works at St Marys and has confirmed that pompey are currently tabling a bid for Lambert. What with - fricking shirt buttons?? The deluded few are so dim.

funniest bit is how after our poor start they took offence at Nige's throwaway remark about them keeping up with us - and they couldn't! We have taken more points than them since that game, the sort of thing you'd keep under wraps if you were champions. But no, they printed that fact on their own programme, and made a banner to remind Nige that his managerial record has been better than Poyet's - for some bizarre non-motivational reason? even Huddersfield have matched them point for point since game 14 - the title was won in August. So, Saints and Huddersfield - the two best footballing sides in the division - and with proper managers. Hopefully Poyet doesn't get sacked before they come to St Marys, I look forward to more of his great motivational work!

Clearly the next season will be the interesting one, let's assume they stumble through the next few wagebills and make it to August. Assuming there is no significant new investment - The squad clearout is desperately needed though there will still be a few players making a joke of the salary cap, from the business side they will get the wages down to a sustainable level as long as they don't continue the quality over quantity madness. Income - season ticket money will be down again and I can't see an increase in sponsorship or commercial activity. Normally this business might just be able to break even..... Sadly there's a cva on the horizon and if a squad was gathered on the above terms they would be in the relegation battle they delayed from this season. If the court cases go against them as well they could be starting the season with a really weak squad and a penalty. A year ago I would have said they are banged to rights on the tax evasion but with the legal escapes they have already managed I can't see a points penalty being imposed - unless QPR get hit hard and the few's case pops up on the FA radar at an unfortunate moment. As the season progresses we're likely to see another attempt at delaying the cva, though I think it has to be paid in the time limit so they would leave themselves with an almighty lump sum to find in year five - maybe the current owner doesn't regard that as his problem. A business you used to own has been hit with a massive sporting penalty? Who cares! The big flaw with the Russian plan? - sounds like they are asking the loan shark to go back to where he was before, owed money but with no control of the business. Currently he has rights over the ground and transfer income, he's not going to release that without some cash in hand. As they say in Russia, there's nowt worse than tyre-kicking money launderers. If they do agree a deal I can just see more debt being added to the black hole, they aren't going to put their own money in, if the were they would buy with a lump sum - Saab is seeking lending as well so these guys seem reluctant to part with any cash. I cannot see a situation where they can compete in the transfer market to get Prem quality players the masterplan requires. The dream scenario to potential buyers seems to be a Prem return and the riches that accompany that. On paper they are one promotion away - in reality they are £10-20M from that, and no one wants to put a quid in. And if they did get back up the feeding frenzy from interested parties looking for their money back would look like a bloodbath. Best case? What I would call the justice scenario - Minus 25pts, weak squad, 6K gates. Worse case? - they get dumped down a division and we don't get to hammer them at Fratton. Most likely - no irregularities found, no tax evasion proved, new owners with little cash, bumbling along in midtable mediocrity, 3rd/4th on the south coast.

Arguably, pound for pound, we have the best support in the Championship and, do you know what, with a little bit of help and a few players that might have been us this year. Yes Steve, let's ignore the facts shall we - 13th in the average attendance league and 30 points adrift despite choosing to outbid teams at the top of the table with your cunningly suicidal recruitment policy. Yet another new version of history for the deluded few to suffer. Is it wrong to feel sorry for some of them having to put up with this while we celebrate our own season? Or shall I just remind myself of the arrogant rubbish we have had to put up with from a criminally-run, insolvently-trading, money-laundering operation, supported by a handful of caravan-tugging, sister-bothering, lucky heather sellers? If QPR get hit hard pompey could be in a bit of trouble - it's really not a good time to be in court. Cue bleats about it's not us, it was other owners, we didn't mean to cheat etc. I believe we will resume our place above them in four months time.

I can't recall our club being in such good condition - big plans, great squad, delivering on the pitch, investment likely to be available, and of course well managed at all levels. If there was a league of the 92 clubs grading fans' satisfaction with their lot, I reckon we have gone in two years from about 90th right up into the top four. Who is having more fun at the moment? Norwich perhaps, but even Brighton can't be as confident about the future - I reckon Cortese has created one of the happiest bunch of fans in the UK. Even the miserable ones who managed to move swiftly from promotion celebrations to fearing a potential increase in ticket prices - that window of positivity lasted 25mins yesterday. We are living a fantastic era for the club - soak it up!