pap

The most read article on the Beeb's website at the moment poses this very question, largely on account of recent comments by Vince Cable. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-25444981 This isn't a new question. The linked article has a seven-minute video on this very topic, produced long before Cable's remarks. Some interesting evidence showing how London is prioritised here; both Manchester and Birmingham have better links to London than they do to other cities, including each other. The point is also made that London's focus tends to be the country's focus - would manufacturing be more venerated if the capital was in the West Midlands, for example. Is London's success built at the expense of provincial towns and cities? If so, what can be done about it? Is more decentralisation the answer, or should we be thinking of something more radical, such as changing our capital?

I have someone like this on my feed. They have been trying for kids for years, but have settled for dogs and don't stop going on about them. Other Facebook annoyances:- People who post too much personal information. I don't want to know about long-dormant trauma or rows with your in-laws, ta. Cryptic messages, usually negative, targeted at no-one but obviously meaning someone. e.g. "There are some proper c*nts round here", etc. Cries for attention in general. "Celebrate the English flag" groups that turn out to be hotbeds of racism, ignorance and Islamophobia. F**king runners. Runners are boring in real life too.

I'd go wider than that, me ol' mucker. Elevator music forms just part of an overall culture that neuters music as not to offend, but ends up offending anyone with taste. During my tenure as a cheese chopper in ASDA Southampton, I had to suffer the indignity of ASDA FM during my shifts. The edgiest song they played on that station was Bohemian Rhapsody, and they never used to play the finale. So it's alright to have the nice quiet bit at the beginning where Freddie is explaining how he's murdered someone, but the heavy bit at the end with guitars (but far less crime-laden lyrics) is out? FFS. All these twinkly slowed-down cover versions of rock songs repurposed for w4nky commercials annoy me too.

For the benefit of the forum. I sent Barry a PM in April saying that I might be wrong about him being dune and would offer a full apology if I was wrong. Only thing is, I still think he might be dune and don't really want to offer one up, only for the little tyke to say "hah, I was dune all along - and you fell for my brilliant plan". Given our relative proximity, a quick snifter should be easy enough to sort it all out. The ball has been in Barry's court since then. This means that he's spent the best part of eight months needlessly begging for an apology on here when it could have been sorted in a jif.

Don't know about that. I'd put it more in the annoying category of non-conversation that seems to afflict different people in different ways. I know loads of scousers who'll end every sentence with y'know or begin a sentence with "errrm". Computer studies teacher 'o mine back in Southampton used to end every sentence with either "ok?" or "right?", without fail. After a while, it's all you hear.

This happens a lot in North Carolina too, but with a bigger drawl on the word "So".

dune was a lot smarter than you, Barry old chum, but he suffered the same afflictions, god bless him. He's still over on the UI, doing his thing, but to a less easily offended audience on a less populated forum. Given the amount of time he used to spend on here, and now doesn't, I'm sure he's living a rich and fulfilling life with the additional time he has on his hands. I don't think he ever thought Danny Fox was a witch, though. Speaking of coppers, what was the basis of your Danny Fox = Witch deductive reasoning, Inspector Sanchez?

Arf. Latest from Twitter? "Heard from my contact that after the game @danistone25 slapped Pardew for his actions regarding Fonte previously" Jesus wept* (*would be fkn funny if true tho)

I take it I'm talking to a slow typist I work with far-flung people and frequently have to instant message them. This is fine. Waiting for the response does my f**king head in. One bloke, a fellow programmer if you can believe it, typed so slowly that I could only assume that he had replaced the traditional "finger-based" approach with an unorthodox method of typing only with his cock. And as for the muggles on Facebook, Jesus wept. F*ckers would be quicker sending me a letter in the post.

People who can't type quickly.

I know it's panto season, but the pair of you can stop this immediately, tyvm.

It doesn't matter which zombies you go for; slow, fast, undead or "infected" - rule one is "destroy the brain". Everyone knows this, to the extent where I think a zombie outbreak would be contained in fairly short order. This bloke is too convincing. I'm amazed he got out of that shop without an implement lodged in his cranium.

Weren't fans of the show, though. "nothing ever happens", apparently.

That also includes thick c*nts Again, metaphorical, not literal.

C*nts. The metaphorical, not literal kind.

Right you are. You should add the Del Amitri one to your list though.

Tokes - your credibility was shot the moment you re-purposed Del Amitri's hit to get at Bletch. Despite the triumphalist tone you've adopted since your victory, it is difficult not to imagine you sat at home listening to "This is how it feels (to be lonely)" on endless repeat. For your sakes, I hope that this is a recent development brought about by the fame and fortune of multiple SWF awards (lonely at the top) and not a permanent state of affairs.

I've tried being normal. It was alright. Wore off after a bit.

Careful now, Phil. He might just be marketing his new album when he says he's retiring. If that's the case, you've just started a proper Bieber appreciation thread. We really need MLG to nip onto his fan sites and start suggesting SMS as a venue if we really want him gone from the music industry

Ah, c'mon. There was at least one other person that used to do it

Well deserved, Bletch. I'm actually surprised I came 4th. Real drop off after 3rd though

Or just watch some Stewart Lee. That man has some balls on him. I doubt many of the keyboard warriors who go on about "sweaties" would stand in Glasgow and call William Wallace a paedophile. Quite a tense room there.

There was me thinking you'd quit this thread out of decency. You should have got more for your "decency" money than this tired old quip*. * S'alright. I never bought it at the time.

Despite MLG's faux pas with Italian league players, Southampton have some of the best players in the game. Real Madrid came in for Wanyama. Sold him for 43m to allow some of the youngsters a go. Gaston Ramirez is excellent too. Still in my team and played as an inside forward. Worth 33M. Some highly recommended players. Doria. Vitinho. Kevin Volland. I am trying Gaston Gil Romero out too. Looks like a steal for 12m.

I have very much enjoyed the spectacle of Smirking debasing himself for votes. Congratulations on your bronze, Smirkers!