The Kraken

And you too. Good one.

This is Pompey we're talking about, what do you think the likelihood of that is?

What rallyboy said.

What a very odd attention-seeking thread, in particular this post. Well done, you got noticed.

Harsh but fair.

Go on then, count me in, I've got some spare time on my hands.

He should be able to play it on his own though. He holds the ball up fantastically well, and his awareness is top notch. The problem as I've seen it so far is not from RL, but that support players such as Puncheon, Lallana and Rodriguez (or whoever the wide players have been) are far too slow to get forward and support him. 4-5-1 is supposed to turn into 4-3-3 very quickly, and then back again to regain defensive shape. We simply haven't got the hang of that yet, with the wide players and Lallana often being 20 or 30 yeards away from RL when he's surrounded by players. I don't care if you've got Didier Drogba in that situation, its not going to work from an attacking point of view if the wide players aren't able to recognise when they should commit forwards.

It saddens me to think of some of the rampaging orgies that will soon be kicking off in the athletes village.

The bloke in the lightbulbs was one of the main baddies in The Running Man, right?

To be fair, Brazil's efforts are a bit better than our red bus abomination in Beijing.

I'd give Jessie J the worst 5 seconds of her life.

Its like Gladiators. Awooooooooooooga!!

Fatboy Slim in a massive inflatable octopus, didn't see that coming.

Are we showcasing the fact that our ageing rockers can no longer sing live?

Miming, George? Poor form.

If Lennon and Mercury appear on stage I'll take it all back.

It's tacky, slap on the back, insular tacky nonsense. The opening ceremony was a celebration of Britishness that was self-deprecating, humourous and classy. This has been quite weird, awkward, poorly executed (some terrible live singing) and just overall naff. Hopefully it'll get better with the athletes in there and less scope for acrobatical f*ckaboutery.

Its a shame you need the acoustics to appreciate it. Apparently the acoustics for the opening ceremony were unbelievable too, but the whole spectacle came across on TV so well. This, well, hasn't. It's been poorly thought out and poorly executed.

This is, quite frankly, f*cking embarrassingly bad.

Phew. I'm glad it will be quite easy to fix, I'm relieved now.

I imagine the supporters of a lot of them do, yes. Especially clubs that have just been promoted and are yet to find their feet in the top division. Last season City had Swansea on opening day, and mullered them 4-0. I doubt there were any Swansea fans who expected anything from the game. Then they got on with the rest of the season; just as we will.

Would you care to show us just one post that mentions relegation in this thread? Other than your own, of course. Just one post would be great. Thanks.

This. I do keep having to remind myself that Chelsea are down to 10 men, but even so its scary viewing.

OK, you still haven't answered my question about the "I told you so" part and that's after a few efforts, so perhaps best we leave it.