Convict Colony

Finally a thread i like

We've been losing the vast majority of our games for a few seasons now but this season we have finally got the consistency right and are losing loads and loads, must of been the record transfer windows we've been having that's made us excellently shit. Spend over 150m in 2 windows and get worse - the saints way.

Ok the brain dump no one asked for: Bazunu - Thought he did ok and his distribution was good, thought he was unlucky that bednerak was in the way of the shot so whilst he got a hand to it it wasnt enough, dont think he was at fault for the goal as people think as bednerak was like 2m infront of him so didnt have much time to react. AMN - Thought he did rather well for a midfielder in the RB position, saw off gnoto and was very solid, still cant be sure if I blame him and mara for not stopping the through ball or whoever was meant to be picking up the leeds players chatting on the edge of the box for the goal but overall was good. ABK - Thought he was a 50/50 type player today, somethings when for him and others he was exposed, think he will be better when Salisu is back as he knows there is the 1-1 king behind him and he can push forward but he did some good defending today so gets a pass today. Bednerak - Actually I thought after 1min he started well but then he started playing like he had clown shoes on for the other 89mins, he does defend well when its blocks etc but he has that teenager whose big for his body vibe the rest of the time as he is clumsy as fuck constantly, he could be through on goal and kick it into his face - he's our own phil jones and knowing our luck will be our starting CB and club capt in the championship next season. Perraud - Am with @Chez on this, perraud tries hard, he is very french but i find he cant cross a ball without hitting the person standing 5m's away and can't really defend - if KWP is the barometer for the right then Perraud offers nothing like him would be a good squad player in the EPL but will be our starting LB in the championship. Lavia - Joe Shields erection would of got harder today after that result, Lavia is too good and will go with the best wishes from myself absolute beast. JWP - Not much happening for JWP today, saw a bit more captaining going on but not much influence in the play, not sure how we didnt link up with the forwards better but hey JWP can't do it all himself. Dumb - Armstrong - Terrible - His fault is normally that he loses the ball in the centre circle but today he regressed and started losing it deep in our half, he is the scottish redmond and should be 10000000000000000000000000% dropped for the next game. & Dumber - Moi - I think both Moi and Stuey should change their names to turnover as I have never seen 2 players who give the ball straight to the opposition as much, yes he might retain the shape of the team well etc but the offer nothing to the forwards. The ball stops with them and the oppo attacks again Tall paul must wish he was back in Genk. Sulemana - The person who is talent in the quote about hard work beating talent - lazy as shit today, nothing came off and to be honest i think for the rest of the team they expect him to create mircales from terrible balls (maybe thats just me), didnt work hard enough and I would expect him to be dropped or at least played as a winger in the next game he's not a no.10 if we play no balls to paul. Tall Paul - Thought when he saw a football he looked composed, good feet again etc so unlucky to get pulled but serisouly the crosses he got was like 1 good one from armstrong all game, we could buy Haaland and wonder why he doesnt score when mahraz keeps losing the ball in his half, actually felt sorry for him today. Selles - Ok I get you stuck with the team who work well last week and you used all 5 subs but I want us to have players on the pitch next week whose first instinct is to attack, feed strikers, winger etc - you get a pass today as I thought Diallo/Mara/Walcott gave us something different but if you pick Stu/Moi and Jan next game I am out bro. Saintsweb - Defo less knicker wetting today but I am not sure if that was due to the absentee posters or our new chill vibe. Best comment still was the jimmy sommerville could play for leeds, I would expect tomorrow the 15yr old teenage angst will show up and spend all day complaining but as saints fans how often have we been good really ? Red Wine - Was nice - brought it out at half time and performed like a top class hooker, smooth, fast and goes down well - thanks Hardy's.

Oh yeah what service would he of got today - the service is the problem, Moi and Armstrong wouldnt be employed in mcdonalds with their service. We need to feed our strikers and at the moment Tall Paul is already bloody thin.

Best comment today

Alright Selles no more bullshit with the team selection I want us going hard at every team now not these "he has good discipline" footballers - we need to score goals and therefore we need players who are risk takers. I want us to be trying to score like katie price is infront of us, balls out. Also when the fuck will we score from a corner.

Thank god I choose wine

Whilst we are all arguing whose at fault for the goal, I would actually say its Mara and AMN for letting the player get the ball through from the corner flag

Stop hahahahahahahaha

Things that never happened

bednerak in the way of bazunu - classic

terrible defending

Lavia is a beast

Its all about mindset - next goal wins

MAra diallo and walcott coming on

Someone tell armstong to get off the pitch he's been terrible today bro

@Chez gonna be kicking cats and getting the vodoo doll out - Perraud hitting the first man on the cross

Tall paul currently the only player who looks composed when ball at his feet, rest looking like they are rushing and forcing everything

Selles just telling Bednerak to stop being shit and become awesome

well this start has been shit - armstrong already hitting his lose the ball metrics and causing chaos for our CBs. I preferred when armstrong lost it in the centre circle not near our box.

One postive that has carried on from chelsea is our all round shithousery and gamesmanship. Keep it up

ok that 1st half was horrendous watching unless your putting together a blooper real. Just got a bottle of red to help me cope with the 2nd half. Want Armstong off and probably Moi as well either at HT or at 60mins. Tall paul has looked ok when he's had the ball the rest seem hurried, like JWP telling everyone to slow it down which makes sense as Leeds can only play fast fast fast. Araonsen looks like a diver and Selles looked proper pissed off going down the tunnel.

tarmstrong has been terrible he couldnt beat an egg

I assume your a time traveller and he has just scored

jesus armstrong and moi have been shit