Lighthouse

That's far too small a sample size to say we looked infinitely better. We had plenty of thumping wins with four at the back last season.

Alcaraz reputation has really dined out on the four goals he scored in the PL last time. In 18 months he really has delivered very little else. Like it or not, we got more Championship goals from Rothwell in a similar position last year and nobody wants him back. He’s clearly got technique but just doesn’t look comfortable in English football. If we get a good offer for him we should take it.

Which kind of proves the whole fallacy of doing it in the first place. It just breeds resentment that people are hired for reasons other than being the best candidate for the job. Worse than that when a minority does get a job on genuine merit, people fail to distinguish it from a box ticking appointment, so you end up doing more harm than good.

Would love the alliteration if we ended up with Aribo, Adam Armstrong, Amo-Ameyaw and Archer in attack at some point.

All the way to 11th last season, just below Crystal Palace. They're nothing special just because they sign a player we were linked with.

Apparently he sent messages to two women who ‘work on the show’ saying that Spurs were going to win the league. There are some sick people out there.

Because it makes people click on it.

It’s easy to point fingers but the fact is that most countries have access to some form of junk food but with vastly differing obesity rates. It’s more of a cultural/attitude problem. Bad habits stretch out on a national scale, people for whom a night in with a Deliveroo Dominoes and a bottle of Prosecco is a bog standard weekly occurrence and a triple cream, sugar filled latte is a daily beverage.

It’s amazing just how much of a difference you can make just by breaking bad habits. I used to have a can of Cola, a Crunch Corner and a chocolate bar with lunch every day, then when I started going to the gym I changed my diet a bit and all that got cut out. I’ll still have unhealthy treats and I’ve never denied myself anything because I’m ‘on a diet’ but it’s very much a case of seeing something I fancy in the supermarket, rather than having it every day just because. On a slight tangent, I consider myself incredibly lucky that in the quarter of a million years humans have existed I was, by barely a decade or two, born into a generation where electric toothbrushes, fluoride toothpaste and mouthwash are all commonplace.

Jones, Richards, Oakley, Kachloul, Tiss and Pahars all walk into our current team. Claus would probably edge out JS if I had to choose a back three.

He really wasn’t anything special, with the comfort of playing behind the best defence we’ve had in 40 years. Playing in this team, I think we’d have seen a lot more of his flaws.

Considering the amount of coverage celebrity minge-for-hire Katie Price has had over the last 25 years, I think we can safely conclude that commercial media is not a good barometer for what’s important in life.

Okay, bye then. Thanks for the er… pass against Leeds.

At this point, they should just swap countries and be done with all this nonsense.

I think stopping City from winning the quadruple in the League Cup would probably top that. Beating United in 2003 is probably on par with it too.

I’d just like to get the regular, abysmal mis-spelling up and running by saying, welcome Matthias Fernando!

And yet you know it’s happening all the time, which kind of suggests the BIB isn’t true. News is news, it’s largely based on what’s perceived to be new and til grab people’s attention, not some sort of ethical scale of what’s the most tragic and meaningful event of the week. If it was the latter, the main story on the six o’clock news would probably have been deaths from heart disease, every day for the last twenty years.

If you can bump somebody off by getting a tornado to hit their yacht then fair play, that’s a whole new level of Bond villain-esq assassination. Maybe Tiss is right, the government do control the weather.

I believe he is approximately pi squared.

Well Mara is an outstanding player. I mean literally - he’s out, standing in the middle of the pitch.

… six years ago.

Yes.

It’s German registered, I wouldn’t read anything into that. Fixed.

Spurs really could finish third in a chess match.

I’m not sure that really follows. Let’s assume the extreme worst case and say that even with extra security, he never feels safe going back to that house again. If he was forced to sell up and move his family, surely he could simply move to a different part of Hampshire and still play for us.