1976_Child

Pinnochio (its all lies, this deal ain't going through)

Nope. Maggie was evicted from the Big Brother house a long time before tuition fees. And under New Liebour we now have 'postcode education apartheid'. At least in the 'good old days (sic)' if you were rich you went to private school and ended up in managment and if you were poor you went to the local comp and ended up on the factory floor and each had a meaningful job. Now, thanks to the cancer of 'globalization' and 'out-sourcing' we have no productive capacity, no genuine wealth creation industries in our country to take the well educated and the less well educated alike and put them to work with capital (savings) to make things we can consume and/or export. Instead we have greasy career politicians (both red and blue) who just suck up to you during an election year and then do absolutely nothing to address the real problems our country faces. And first among these problems is that we do not produce anything of value anymore. We do not invent, we do not build, we do not solve engineering problems. Sure there are exceptions which make the rule but on balance (and as our trade deficit clearly shows) we do not add one iota of proper wealth to the world. All we do is consume other peoples' productive output; sending them our pounds, borrowed from the sweat of future labour, in return for present consumption. Ludicrous. And yet we kid oursleves that we have sorted out the best educational system for our children? Pull the other one. It has bells on it.

Stop it! Naughty.

I speak mediocre kiswahili if you need an online translator while you are there but then in Kenya you are never too far from someone who speaks passable English. How well do you know Kenya? Nairobi in the 90s was awful - I hated it. Give me good old Dar es Salaam everyday of the week. Dar is still much poorer than Nairobi but I always felt it was much more honest (and i don't mean thieving etc. Just more at ease with itself). Which actually is a fairly accurate discription of Kenya/TZ in the round. Except for the remnants of 'happy valley' Nairobi was not my favourite. (the 'Klingon-Colonials' as we called them were an arrogant bunch but actually good fun and very hospitable. And boy, they knew how to drink!) I spent most of my time in Kenya in the semi-deserts surrounding Lodwar right up near the Sudanese border. Bleak as the moon and a whole world away from the 'lions and elephant' savannah image naturally associated with Kenya. Where ever you go I truly wish you luck! East Africa is an outstandingly marvelous place and I am very jealous of you! Good luck.

Good one! They only put in to plymouth. Cole Porter, this is how it should have been written: Times have changed, And we've often rewound the clock, Since the Puritans got a shock, When they landed on Southampton Rock. If today, Any shock they should try to stem, 'Stead of landing on Southampton Rock, Southampton Rock would land on them.

We should use her as a troop carrier during the next world war. We will be engaged in a global shoot-out before long and will need reliable vessels to carry us all to our deaths.

Drink gin?

bovril. all i got in the cup-board.

You will all be delighted to know that my potato(e) is now cooked. I shall enjoy it. Thank you for making this thread so much fun!

Ahh! At last something to get my angry ****ed off political teeth into! Education, education, education. New Liebour's show piece. Cornerstone of their manifesto. ****ing utter waste of time, effort and energy. Here is my education manifesto: 1. Any education manifesto that does not, right at the outset, acknowledge the Golden Fact is doomed to failure. The Golden Fact: some kids are Einstein-bright, some are Plan©k-thick. With out this truth written clear at the top of every page of the manifesto we will always have a sub-standard schooling system. 2. Centralised, socialised education policy is about as useful as Gordon Brown's budget calculator. 3. The asumption that 50% of school leavers should attend 'Uni' and rack up stupendous debts just to please some over-paid box-ticker in Whitehall is just pure bastard stupid init. 4. A teacher should be able to walk into a class room and expect all the pupils (not 'students') to stand up and shut up. Failure to comply should be met with a sound caning. 5. The basic 'operating system' of each and every child should include: English (written, read and spoken), mathematics (basic everyday maths), history (not of some far away tribe, but of the nation they are born into), geography (a knowledge of the world map, countries and capitals), science (an appreciation of the empirical method and the basic laws of nature). There is no need to fill the curriculum with advice on how to fist a badger, dress your sister in a burka, use a condom at the ripe old age of six and other such pinko-liberal nonsense. Just give the kid the basic operating system and then cut them loose. 6. School uniform should be mandatory. Failure to comply should result in a sound caning. 7. Unruly, rude or violent parents should be shot. There is no place for pikeys in this world, let alone in a school. 8. Primary schools should never ask hard working, tax paying parents to give even more.

O2 broadband is excellent. They use ADSL2 which is twice as fast as ADSL (standard). Customer service is excellent as well. Go with them.

Tits are too big. Big tits frighten me. Give me a nice sensible pair of udders any day of the week rather than the complete milk board.

Just buy the club!

W is for "Wait for it" X is for "sign where it is marked 'x'" Y is for Yes we will buy the club Z is for we will graze a flock of Zebra on the pitch

Fantastic! But not tonight. I've just put a potatoe in the oven (see separate post). But good idea... might give it a shot one day

I have just put a potatoe in the oven to cook. I'll let you all know when it is ready.

G is for Gad fly

F is for ****ing Sign the FFF'ing deal!

No you bloody can't! Awwwite?

It is a big fat mystery, wrapped in an enigma, shoved up someone's bum. ... to misquote Churchill

This is a ducking **** take init? Has me in stiches!!!!!

A good point someone made above about the extra revenue a KK + MLT duo would bring in. So long as the club didn't try and stiff us with silly prices I would bet my left testicle that we would get way better gates with them in charge than over the last season. Last season it was £24 a ticket on the day. I would hope that they would be sensibly priced at around £17/18 and season tixs cheaper as well. I heard that Blackburn are flogging STs for £99 - in the prem? Chrikey, makes you think eh. SFC is def a good buy for Mr Investor and I am sure that he has more business savy than RL and will prefer to get the stadium full and buzzing as soon as possible. Bring it on! KK in the dug-out, MLT in the boardroom, reasonably priced tix and the most passionate fans in the land. We can't fail! We will have won the Champions League within five years for sure!! UP THE GLORIOUS SAINTS!

...and by the way, even with out the South's one-and-only true football club, Hampshire is quite adequately represented on the footie map by Eastleigh FC and Totton AFC, two venerable footballing clubs with more pedigree and pride in a single blade of grass than pompey has in total!

To be honest my skate friend, recently I haven't even been able to look at our result first. Just take it for granted that it wasn't good news. Then I look at Pompey and see they've fallen apart again and the smile returns to my face!!

very good!