jeff leopard

oh my. go easy on them. my senior team conceded their first goal of the season on sunday but scored six to totally humiliate and annihilate our promotion contenders. if i can win the home leg against them in three weeks time then its as good as in the bag. 'killblinton's sinister army!' :prayer::prayer::prayer: crikey though, league 5 looks really tough.

Kevin Shields or Brian Gibson from Ligtning Bolt, he can do more with a bass guitar than all heavy metal 'axemen' combined and squared. I WIN!

it really is. they encored with it and it was a lovely way to end the evening.

Flaming Lips - Embryonic its a long rambling druggy mess but they wear it very well. they've gone back to their early 90s roots and produced one of their best albums since 'hit to death...'. whowoodathunkit?

about half were scouted, including the keeper. but i was lucky that i had two or three home-growns who clicked in the first position i tried them in from game one. i could still do with another wingback and a decent striker, but so far so good.

some of my young 'uns had a tear in their eye on final whistle today as they were taught just what a sour heartless mistress football can be. my illegitamate XI were away to the top side (who have thumped teams for fun so far this season) but against form my boys started well and ended up dominating the half. Their main failing was the number of chances they missed but they took a 0-1 lead into the break. in the second half, we missed more chances and in the last ten minutes the opposition finally came to life and laid seige to my goal. my keeper made a number of great saves but we lost 2-1. still, there's only so much you can learn from winning games, excuse me, my eyes are a little sweaty today. my reserves had a good win on Tuesday, but much more importantly, two more of my key players who suffered a collapse of form at the start of the season have got their mojo back and return to the first team just in time for part one of the-great-top-of-the-table-promotion-decider. my team are up to pretty much full-strength and look good, sexy-fine, even. a win would put me so much in control it will be scary, a draw would also make me stong favourites. all I need to worry about is getting d1cked on, and I don't think that's gonna happen. now I play the waiting game (which is strikingly similar to the w@nking game, which I'm great at)

after seeing spiritualized doing 'ladies and gantelmen…' in full the other night, I though I'd give 'let it come down' another go. I didn't like it when it came out, probably due to the crushing weight of expectation, and compared to l&g it just seemed a bit predictable and flat. A couple of months ago I heard it at a friends house and it sounded good and today I got it out, dusted it off and gave it a play. And its brilliant and I was a fool. for you shoe-gazey types, have some classic rapido

you know its going to be special when everone in the audience gets a free kazoo. I went to see Sorry I Haven't a Clue on tour last week, with Jack Dee doing the business as host and a classic line-up of gardner, brooke-taylor, humphreys and hardy. graham gardner was as razor sharp as ever (i'd call him the poor man's john cleese but everthing he's done since a fish called wanda has just been painful to watch) and jeremy hardy was great as the token 'young person', making jokes about the israel defence force and saying **** on a regular basis. best part of the night was 'kazoo karaoke' where the audience played tunes for the panel to guess, the power of thousands of kazoos cracking out 'hit me with your rhythm stick' will stay with me forever. last night i got dressed up to go to the royal festival hall to see spiritualized perfoming 'ladies and gentleman...', live, on stage, as it was performed. i really like the concept of bands playing classic albums in full as you get to hear the songs in the context they were written for. and 'ladies and gentleman' has a clear over-arching narrative corning the nitty gritty of falling in and then out of love, that deserves to be heard in full in such a grand setting (i'm pretty sure it was my first gig in a venue with a royal box). famously, 'ladies and gentleman' was jason spaceman's own break-up record/stark self portrait after his lady secretly married richard ashcroft (double ouch) and to its credit it doesn't wallow in its own misery juices. it starts off full of wonder and awe and self-depreciating humour and the joys of feeling alive. but in the second half of the album self-doubt and fears of betrayal bum-rush the show. and it ends badly, as on a long enough time-line all relationships do. jason finally sees the light but its only to realise the whole time he though he'd been walking in space he's actually been w@nking for coins in a gutter of his own drug-filth. live and learn. and it all sounds amazing over ten years later, with his hired lackies, string section and choir, jason was on red hot form, encoring with a stunning 'out of sight' which i could hear being sung by choirs or angels and loved-up beardy guardian readers all the way back to waterloo. cosmic

the kids are alright, some are actually decent. my illegitimate XI edged a 7 goal thriller on thursday afternoon against the team above us in the league. despite losing out on possession my kiddies took the lead three times and deserved the win, my keeper made some great saves during a very nervy last ten minutes. he's been my star so far this season. for the senior team, this sunday is the last in a series of four straight games against bot-team and rubbish human-teams, so its all about throwing them forward and scoring as many as possible. my young striker is currently top scoring in the league with 8, and my younger defenders have been getting their fare share too. next week i play my main rivals at their place, a draw would do me fine but i've got a feeling that i'm going to sneak a win. here's my hallowed dark place, permanently shrouded in drizzle. it seats 21,001 but i guess my ave. gate is about 17,000. dare thee enter my theatre of.....nightmares?

Well the dish is too hot you'll never guess what I've got Joy Division oven gloves If it's her desire I'll put my fingers in the fire 'Cos I've got Joy Division oven gloves I've got Joy Division oven gloves Ooh ooh tropical diseases Ooh ooh chemical alarm Ooh ooh I'm a little blasé In me Joy Division oven gloves In me Joy Division oven gloves Joy Division oven gloves - Half Man Haldf Biscuit

:rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes: it will happen primarily due to Brown's unpopularity but a good sound to it! you have got to be trolling. i doubt there is an emptier, more shallow creature on this planet.

I know what you mean. If this is going to be their only UK reunion gig then trapesing up North and spending hundreds of pounds would ultimately be worth it. But I don't fancy doing that if there going to play some shows or festivals nearer to home and less pricey. There's a facebook petition going around to convince the festival hall to give them an eight night residency but the venue doesn't think they're popular enough. Arrrggghhh!!!!! What shall I do!!!!!

Franz Kafka - The Metamorphosis Probably the most critically acclaimed short story/novella ever written. Travelling salesman Gregor Samsa, hated by all his customers, and, despite his role as sole bread-winner, isolated from his parents and sister, wakes up one morning to discover he has been transformed into a huge insect. What at first seems to be a curse for his unsatisfying life-style slowly reveals itself to be wish-fulfilment on Gregor's part, who is now a parasite his family must care for. Kafka buries the true horror of what is happening within Gregor's matter-of-fact narration and the wealth of tiny everyday details which place the reader at the centre of the nightmare and illustrates the macabre that exists within the mundane, in a classic gothic stylee. As I'm more of a film fan than a great reader it made me think of Lynch's Eraserhead and Cronenburg's The Fly. Brilliantly gripping, heart-breaking and strangely life-affirming. Poor old Gregor

never underestimate the effectiveness of the stick and the carrot. that’s all I'll say on the matter without my lawyer being present. my senior team had another big win on Sunday and have the rather sweet stats of - played 4, won 4, 24 goals for, none against, 12 points. but that will all count for sqiut if we mess up the top of the table clash in two weeks time.

some people find congealed and mouldy fat an essential part of every meal. i'm not one of them.

As hilarious as this is, there's a voice in the back of my mind warning me not to gloat too hard, what with us welded to the bottom of league one. but saying that, anyone else find their choice of sponsor to be brilliantly apt? At least Paul knows where to go once he's been given the boot or the whole team have been released, which ever happens first.

*punches air and makes a face like i'm doing a vast poo* my kiddies just won 5-1 away from home, yeah! LOCK AND LOAD! BOMB IRAN! HECKLE OBAMA! USA! USA! it looks like the team i beat are the league's whipping boys but hey, 3 points and +1 goal difference after my first two games. I'M THE KING OF THE FRAKIN WORLD! IN YOUR STUPID FACE, HUMAN RACE!

that's what the 13 year girl said (that doesn't really work in the written form, oh well). knife in the water, repulsion and chinatown are all great too. "forget it jake, its zurich" etc

Gary Linaker raped and strangled all those kiddies with special needs after Everton lost the 1986 cup final, but that seems to have been forgotten by the ruling classes. the thing with Polanski is that some people feel that he's suffered enough, what with growing up in a polish ghetto and then his wife/unborn child being killed by Charles Manson's followers, and there's some doubt over the strength of the case against him. its all covered in a highly rated documentary that came out last year http://uk.rottentomatoes.com/m/roman_polanski_wanted_and_desired/ i wouldn't be surprised if this re-kindled the authorities' desires to see him banged up the slammer. If you were the guy that organised the swiss film festival that booked Polanski to come and collect a lifetime achievment, how gutted would you be?

Groovy, I'll just need your CRB form and a stool sample and we're away. I'm mainly using senior reserve games to get the sh1ttest of my players into something resembling good form (using the general training setting). There are signs of individual improvement but as a team they are still some way off. After losing 7-1 away to a league 6 team I though I'd play it safe with a home game against a league 7 side, the result was a thoroughly humiliating 3-7 drubbing so… no offence but I don't fancy losing 20 nil. i'm off to play some games against league 7 teams, i may be some time.

KILLblinton's Illegitimate XI played their first game last Thursday and didn't do too badly, they lost 3-0 but some of my home-grown youngsters put in some good performances. At the moment it looks like I've got a decent keeper, two good wingers, a good centre-back and a handy midfielder. I need to find someone who can score goals and my babies might do alright. My senior team is sitting pretty at the top of the league which is increasingly resembling the SPL. Last season it was a four horse race for the title, the best team went up and then last week one of my major rivals became a bot-team! So its now a two horse race with a good chance it could be decided on goal difference. I basking in a 9-0 win on Sunday with my star striker getting five goals. Life is sweet. Anyone want a friendly next Tuesday?

The Swiss have picked a very strange time to grow a pair. Its about time we had another European war.

I not going to pretend to know what would happen, it could go either way, it could benefit the city in a lot of ways or it could be a flash-point to race-related aggression, but winchester hasn't got much of an alienated working-class, which is what groups like the EDL rely on. There's just been a very serious thing on radio 4 about the EDL, and yes, radio 4 is all very middle-class and politically fairly left-wing. it was the bbc though trying to look at the group as objectively as possible and it went to lengths to air the grievances of the white working-class communities in Luton and Leeds, and it admitted that from certain angles it can look like they are getting a raw deal. but when they spoke to EDL supporters the line of 'we're against radicals' has already been over-taken by a general anti-muslim agenda, these people blame literally everything that this is wrong with their lives on the muslim population, everything. and the line 'we attract violent elements' was aired again and again, but as the reporter looked into the EDL, all he found was a disparate collection of far-right elements, hiding underneath the EDL banner. it has no way or regulating its members, any random inter-net forum weirdo (:cool:) is just invited along. it has no political centre, its never accepted any invitations to discuss their grievances with the council or the police or other groups. they plan protests with the police, promise to stay in the allotted areas but then all gather in the pubs at the centre of muslim communities, waiting to draw an aggressive reaction out of the locals, which of course happens. one day, one of these fascist thugs is going to get what's coming to him and get lynched by the locals, and then what, a martyr to an army of morons? god help us. and the bbc spoke to the police who are seriously worried that the EDL is going to start a terrorist campaign, far-right forums are full talk of war, and how to build home-made explosives, its supporters ared linked to far-right terrorist organisations around the world. and here's the ironic part, the image of the EDL given by this programme is one of a collection of extremist and violent groups who have been given a sense of unity by a provocative name and the extreme reactions its drawing from just about anyone with a pulse. remind you of another terrorist organisation? its like ra-ee-ain etc

hang on, some of us have jobs you know... a serious answer? yes of course 'also south winchester', the place is crying out for some fresh blood (not literally EDL fans, there'll be none of that business here). i have no doubt winchester would be a better place if we did have a sizeable injection of people from other countries who have lived unrecognisable lives to our own. let's have the guys who have just been kicked out of the camp in france, it would be much easier to comprehend just what it is the forces are achieving in Afghanistan if we lived amongst people who have recently fled the scene. bring. it. on. serious enough?

the phrase 'too much immigration' is loaded with negative connotations, but I see what you're getting at. I'd begin to re-judge the situation when the following has happened - all golf courses have been reclaimed by the government to use as low cost housing/shanty towns. all second homes/empty properties have been seized for housing our international brothers and sisters. all right-wing nutters/fat chavs/people who like danny dyer have been driven into the sea and their homes given to anyone who isn't british. and I mean anyone. until then, keep them coming.