Legod Third Coming

Woosh...

Serious note. No club in red and white stripes has ever excelled at the very top level - Europe. Us, Sunderland, Stoke, Sheffield United. All perennial underachievers. By contrast since 76 look at the success of teams in red: Liverpool, Nottingham Forest, Manchester United, Bayern Munich... There is some psychology going on here. Teams can't cope when the opposition plays in red.

This is a joke thread right? It should have gone up on April 1st but you overslept?

Ah yes, I can see Nicola responding well to democracy...

If he cost £12m and Bale is worth, what £60m? Then the question is, is he worth one fifth of a Gareth Bale?

Not sure how old these fellas are but bear in mind our strategy will be young players.

Even their own fans know it.

You think that a flair player who thrives on the ball being on the deck and having time and space should suddenly be able to play a kicking game against a team of bullies? How did Spain cope against Holland in the World Cup Final?? Sorry to ask, but have you ever watched top class football?

To be fair to Gaston, yesterday was not a game for him. Bucketing down, against a team of clod hoppers. He will come good against real football teams in September - once this promised bloody global warming turns up!!

Oh and a word for Mike Dean. It starts with "w" and rhymes with anchor. Or starts with "cl" and rhymes with shoeless.

Can the rest of the league vote to relegate a team on the basis that: 1) They don't use the pitch 2) They don't play football 3) They are full of ugly dirty c**ts If so, my vote goes to West Ham.

What is that watch? Subtle as a housebrick.

Lambert. Chunky??? Feck me. I must be morbidly obese!!!!

You're wrong. He uses "Ah durn't nurr, Gareh..." He's using it a lot. "At the murment..."

Two words. Great news.

I don't think we will be complacent. And I agree we can't win every game. But we should win against Reading. They have lost six games in a row. Their defence on Saturday was the very essence of incompetence. We are a very good footballing side. We just have to get the ball down, play it and win. Simples!

Agreed. The turnaround in their form (and that of the teams above them) is monumental. You are asking a team who have not won in six games to suddenly win say 50% of their remaining games. And that's without looking at the fixtures... No, this has 'rebound' written all over it. It's a shame because Adkins is and deserves better.

High risk. Massively high risk.

How has this guy acquired a reputation for being any good. When clearly, he isn't. Not even average!

Why? We have beaten the Champions of Europe and were described as the best team to play at Old Trafford this season! In fact we have a better record against Man United in open play than Real Madrid over two legs against 11 men! So let's just go to Reading and kick their arses as we should and are good enough to do!

And when, by the way, did they ever ask Di Matteo to thank Mourinho? Or Mourinho to thank Ranieri? It's bloody disrespectful is what it is, and is just so typical of the British media fixation with believing that we need English managers at the top of the game. The day English players are the best in the world, is the day English managers need to be the best in the world...

And let's be honest. He should thank... Pardew for finding Lambert. And signing Fonte. And Cork.And Puncheon. The scouting network for finding Shaw. And Schneiderlin. And Lallana. Whoever signed Kelvin? Nicola for funding everything!! And Markus for funding him...

I wonder why Adkins took this job. All that it means is another relegation on his CV. He could have waited and would have found a great Championship or even lower Premiership job in the summer. This feels to me like a lover on the rebound. He couldn't even be positive in his post-match interview yesterday....

And plenty are!

My guess is that you have a significantly higher IQ than most Premiership footballers, that your agent does not keep 20% of your income and that you are careful in your assessment of professional advisors, and quite probably you don't have a lot of friends from the ghetto who you have been extremely generous with over your career because you recognise how lucky you are... I'm not saying I have sympathy with them, but for every Michael Owen and Robbie Fowler there's at least two or three Paul Gasgoines...