SaintsBarry74

I asked ChatGPT: "The absolute worst-ever top-flight season in English football history belongs to Loughborough in the 1899-1900 Second Division, but since we're strictly looking at the top division, here's the answer: Worst-ever season in the top flight: Derby County (2007-08): They hold the record for the fewest points in top-flight history, with just 11 points in the Premier League. Across all years and formats, this is the lowest total ever. No team has come close to matching this total, even in the longer, pre-Premier League seasons. Derby's disastrous campaign is widely recognized as the most historically inept in the English top flight."

This season has been pure misery. We start off “dominating” possession in the league with absolutely nothing to show for it. Russell Martin’s tactics proven about as effective as a concrete parachute, at the same time we’ve managed to break the record for most defensive errors leading to opposition goals - despite the season being far from over. Brilliant. Another dismal record to add to our collection. At least it’s not 0-9 again... (Although Spurs did manage to empty out St. Mary’s by halftime during that 5 goal carnage.) Then we rapidly become the league’s laughing stock, fast-tracked by Martin jinxing Pep and the ensuing media coverage. We go from a struggling side to a full-blown parody. Saints fans, in typical dark humour, start tongue-in-cheek references to Derby, but surely, deep down, no one really thought it was that bad. Martin’s eventually sacked, taking his beloved suicideball with him. Enter Juric - a glimmer of hope - Saints > Derby (surely?). The football improves, but sadly, the points do not. Now, with 15 games left, we’re no longer being laughed at as much as we’re being pitied. Pathetic. The focus for us fans has boiled down to one thing: scraping together 6 more points and avoiding the honour of beating Derby’s infamous record. Honestly, you couldn’t make this club up.

This club takes failure to an extreme unprecedented level. My mate, a Leicester fan, said to me today, "At least you guys don’t have to stress anymore this season - nothing left to play for." I told him, “You’re joking, right? We’re out here fighting to avoid Derby’s record, and even that’s going miserably."

The 9-0s are quite bad as it is, we also have the most frequent heavy defeats per season. But... Beating Derby's record would feel like a point of no return, complete humiliation.

It’s getting a bit lonely down here at the bottom.

He was right, that's why we're on 6 points now.

Based on this season that's actually a good performance.

Will we capitulate from here? Edit: There it is, of course we will. Like clockwork.

Ramsdale said he joined us because he wanted action... Well, he certainly got his wish granted. I haven’t seen someone get peppered this much since D-Day!

Just avoid beating Derby's record that's all I'm asking for. Ffs man.

Those stats are utterly dreadful. At this rate, we’re heading for a pitiful 10-12 points this season. Surely, 6 more points isn’t too much to ask? On the bright side, we don’t claim the "honour" of the highest goals-conceded average in the Premier League since our previous promotion - Norwich take that crown. However, we do excel in one area: complete capitulation. We’ve managed the highest frequency of games conceding 4 or more goals, and no, it’s not just because of the 9-0 thrashings.

Exactly how I feel. Just like my old man passed this curse of supporting Saints onto me, I've gone and done the same to my two boys. My eldest though, won't wear his Bednarek shirt anymore - can't blame him really - and his interest isn't what it used to be. My six-year-old is still fully into it, the other day he piped up: 'Dad we've got 6 points - if we double that we'll have 12. That should be easy, right?' Poor lad still has that innocence about him, he hasn't been properly Saints'd yet.

We've become the black sheep of the Premier League, breaking all sorts of unwanted records - the two 9-0s, and we're also the Prem side with the most frequent heavy defeats (frequency of 4+ goals shipped). Just when we thought the stench of those thrashings had finally worn off, Russell Martin rocks up with his one-dimensional, delusional tactics, turning us into a proper meme. Chatting with my mates who support other clubs, it's gotten even worse - we've gone from being the league's laughing stock to them actually pitying us. Suppose in the midst of all this apathy towards the club, I've come to the grim realisation that there's a genuine chance we'll break Derby's record. Question is, am I the only one feeling this way? How much more humiliation can you possibly stomach?

How many points did Derby have at this stage? We already got two fucking 9-0's hanging over our heads, and God knows how many more high scoring games where we've been on the receiving end, question for everyone: How much more embarrassment can you possibly take? For me, beating Derby's record would be the last straw - there's got to be a limit.

Why do we always ship so many goals? This shit goes back before even RM was in charge. At this point we've accumulated so many embarrassing records at this level... They should just give us a ban from playing in the premier league.

Derby we're coming for you!

1-0 Forest. These rarely score a lot (which is good for us).

Hard to believe, but we've been by far the better team here. FU Martin!!

They're never going down, at least not in our lifetime. Slap them with another points deduction and they'll just start winning every game from here on out. Everton will outlive even mankind, same as cockroaches will.

Leicester looks like they're going down with us. Ipswich looks really shit, but the difference is that they've been able to grind out results. They'll still go down I reckon.

Should have him play in midfield. He’s clearly not a goalkeeper and I don’t think it’s too late to change his position.

He's more of an outfielder than a goalkeeper imo.

It’s fucking sad

Is it me or do we have a bad record of shipping an awful lot of goals? Even before RM.

Worse than the 0-9s? Calm down.