OttawaSaint

We’re ****ing losing this. Everton are a total shambles but our negative tactics are just the tonic teams need. Ffs.

After the goal there was a stoppage and JWP was called to the bench for instructions. I’m guessing now it was “sit back, it’s the last thing they’d be expecting us to do”.

Bertrand is as thick as pig****. Just seen Siggi tie it up and could have had a pop himself but dallies on it and them misses a pass. Hit it ffs!

As soon as it went to Siggi in that spot I was screaming at the defense to stop backing off. Surely they know this guy?

Fluke.

Ffs. There it is.

Ouch VVDs ankle just turned in a most excruciating way.

Everton pass accuracy 70%. We have to win this otherwise just pack up and leave the Prem.

VVD should have buried that, blasted it into the goal.

We need a second because Rooney will come on and score prompting “cometh the hour…” platitudes from the commentator.

We’re ****ing sitting back again. Sort it out!

You not creaming yourself about them anymore?

I think it is called a gale. No waiit, ghoul? Hold on, I’ll get my dictionary.

****ing get in. Tadic!!! Now push on, mor3 if that!

Well done Cedric, much better cross. So close by Austin.

Horses for courses, maybe he’d have been **** here with moping VVD and Bertrand, falling tree in nets and the doped up crab triplets in midfield.

1-1 and the bastsrds are singing our song!

Ffs Tottenham sort it out. Losers!

Some in and out with Miss Goa, yes please!

Aww bless, giving this lead to the new guy, something something golf beating big 6 Les Reed something...

I think we'll **** this up. We are at an equally low ebb, can't score. This has all the hallmarks of a classic Saints **** up.

Enough about your bedroom difficulties, what about Saints?

From the people that brought you Bend it like Beckham we present to you "When Kat met Nelly" and enduring tale of failure, hardship and woe from the streets of Southampton. *stadium scene* Kat: Just fake cheer when (if) Saints score, you don't have to believe it. Nelly: Oh I think I could tell if someone is faking. Kat: Oh yeah? .... Yeaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh get in ya ****ing beauty!!!!! *everyone in block 38 turns to stare at Kat* Nearby moneybags corporate type: I think I support who she supports!

I hear she's a goa...

Put him on a pile with Wigley, Gray, Poortvliet, Burley and Branfoot.