Lighthouse

You're watching Gareth Southgate send out Jordan Henderson, to take on Malta. If you're looking for meaning in life, you wont find it here.

I would agree that, even at the age of 37, the greatest footballer of all time could probably do a job against Blackburn Rovers. Maya Yoshida on the other hand is a different matter.

I’d have used a five iron for that shot.

I wouldn’t give up the day job for a career in alternative comedy.

With Darren Powell running the club shop and Chris Makin mucking out the monkey enclosure at the petting zoo.

He’s here, as the club made quite clear on Twitter, because it’s the MLS off season and he’s training to maintain fitness, at a club and city he is familiar with. Sadly, once you start getting to that age, it is the speed and muscle reflex that start to wane. Beckham said he knew it was time to retire when Messi got the ball and took it past him before his legs could even think about turning around and going after him.

If, “mate, I swear on me nan’s grave!” Was an actual person…

I’m almost certain it’s a guaranteed transfer if we go up, which is going to be almost as painful as actually missing out on promotion, when we lose in the playoffs. 😬

A very good squad player in his day, with a decent attitude but he’s 35 now and we’ve got four decent options at CB. A romantic idea but not one with any practical outcome.

BDD and homosexuality are completely different, I’ve no idea why people keep trying to argue this idea that because gays were once mistreated, these gender identities must be believed in. It’s a complete non-sequitur. I’m not trying to deny anyone any right to dress however they like, however I can’t accept that as a decent, rational argument. You’ve set yourself a moral trap there, let’s say your friend and Gav the 19 stone hairy bricklayer go to a gymnasium and ask to use the ladies changing room. Do you: a) Let neither of them in. Problem - you’ve just invalidated your own argument. b) let both of them in. Problem - you’ve now eradicated any concept of segregated female spaces. c) Only let in your friend and not Gav. Problem - you are now defining women based on your own personal threshold of prettiness. I’ll cut to the point, your answer is almost certainly c, and you’re going to say it’s a ridiculous, nonsense example. Clearly it is, the whole point is somewhere between your friend and Gav, you’ve drawn a line of prettiness and called that a definition of gender. I can’t accept that, it’s not a morally decent argument. I’ve tried to be polite and reasonable, clearly we have a massively different idea of what constitutes a mental health problem. I fundamentally believe that the idea of being ‘stuck in the wrong body’ is a mental health problem, you don’t. I guess we both have to live with that. Do all those things you’ve mentioned lead to problems, yes no doubt. Do they alone account for such a massive attempted suicide rate, compared to other problems in society? No, I don’t accept that. You’ve clearly exceeded the point of being polite and reasonable, as your last paragraph proves. You’re getting personal and it’s just nonsense, at no point have I tried to silence you or anyone else who disagrees with me on this thread (or any other). You know this perfectly well if you’re being honest, so stop trying to play the victim of something which isn’t happening. I have no prejudice at all on this subject, I simply haven’t seen anything close to the burden of proof for what you want me to believe. If your definition of prejudice is not believing what I’m told by someone who feels like it’s true, we clearly disagree on that too. Just be glad I didn’t do that when they came at me with a bible in school. Anyway, between you repeatedly calling me ignorant, prejudice and a fool and aintforever calling me a c*nt I think I’ve had enough lessons on tolerance and acceptance for one day. I bid you all a pleasant evening and leave with a simple point; I’m not trying to deny anyone their right to dress, sleep with or behave in a manner they see fit. Just don’t tell me or anyone else we have to believe or deny anything that we do/don’t believe.

As I’ve already said, no amount of bullying and harassment can explain 40% attempted suicide, there is clearly more to it than that and SOGs posts clearly contradicts what you’ve said, with an example of someone clearly already suffering before anyone could have guessed they’re trans. Kindness and respect means being honest with people and giving the help they need, not just telling people everything they perceive is true, lest you upset them. Is it kind to tell a paranoid schizophrenic there really are voices in the walls? Or an anorexic girl that she really is too fat? 1- Transgender. They’re completely different things, you need to go and educate yourself. 2- The only information you’ve supplied there is that someone became a woman because they got breast implants and presumably a nice hair do and make up. You can either tell women that’s the definition of a woman, or accept that it’s simply a personal style choice and not relevant. In other words, "you need to be more tolerant, you c*nt." Wonderful.

I don’t know how else to interpret whatever it is you’re trying to say. I am genuinely trying to understand what it is that people want me to believe but it’s frustrating, bordering on impossible, because nobody is willing to say what anything is. Everything you’ve said is just what something isn’t, I have zero information to go on here. You’ve claimed that BDD is not a mental illness but people with it have mental triggers which lead to a massive risk of suicide. Those two points are mutually exclusive, I can’t hold both those opinions.

Clearly you believe the statement, "I'm going to kill myself unless all of society accepts my beliefs," is perfectly rational and not indicative of a mental health problem. We'll have to agree to disagree on that. Even if I agree with you, what's the end game here? Gender identities are: Nothing to do with mental health Nothing to do with biological sex Nothing to do with sexual attraction So great, we've established everything they're not. So what are they? What is left that you require me to believe, that you consider it reasonable to end your own life for if I don't? I'll even give you the word woman, it means.... whatever you want it to mean. I'll just come up with a couple of new words to refer to people born with penises and vaginas - which will still exist no matter how much that upsets anyone - and we're right back in our default positions. In your best case scenario, where I concede litterally every point you can possibly put forward, you're just left holding a bunch of meaningless words like 'woman' and 'gender', trying to deal with a lot of angry feminists.

I have no idea what you’re on about.

Had a mare with a delivery driver last year. Went something like this: Ordered an item online for £35, free postage, UK seller. Sent tracking number in confirmation email, checked after a few days and it’s coming from China - okay, no biggie. Get email about a week later saying my parcel will be delivered today - I’m in, perfect. Receive text the same day saying we were unable to deliver your item due to problem with the address. Look out of front window - Nothing. Walk to end of drive - nothing resembling a delivery vehicle for 1/4 mile either way. Receive email saying they will attempt to redeliver on day X. Day X comes, receive text saying they were unable to deliver as item was oversized and needed a specialist vehicle (item would fit in a shoe box). Get fed up and decide to just let them return to sender and claim a refund. Check tracking website a few weeks later, item has apparently been ‘destroyed’ at the depot. Email original website and relay all of the above, ask for refund, they refuse on the grounds that I was ‘negligent’ with my address. Email them about 6 more times with screenshots of my address, written perfectly on the original order email. They refuse point blank to acknowledge any of this, end up getting a refund through Visa.

You literally just complained about all the culture war bullsh*t on the election thread. Do you want it here or not?

That's interesting because now you've removed the idea of sexuality from gender, so you're arguing that a man who dates a transgender woman is quite simply a gay man dating another man. I'm perfectly happy with that argument but an awful lot of trans people I would wager are not. You talked about a lack of validation in your previous post but you freely acknowledge that a transgender person is a) Nothing to do with biological sex and b) Nothing to do with sexual attraction. Well what else are you left with?

I don't see how we can be talking about depression and anxiety triggers leading to suicide, without accepting that there's a fundamental mental health issue. If you can separate the two in your mind that's up to you but I think that takes a huge amount of cognitive dissonance. The link you've provided is from a support group which, well meaning is probably written by someone with a very obvious bias. I can't take that as being objective any more than I would a Christian parents support website, which promises summer camps to pray the gay away. If you're using a lack of validation as a trigger for suicide, well where else does that lead us? For e.g. 99.7% of the world are not Sikh, we believe that the most sacred beliefs they live their lives by are, to put it bluntly, nonsense. The argument that you need to share my beliefs or I'll kill myself is fundamentally awful, deeply manipulative a quite honestly gaslighting a society for simply saying, "I don't share your beliefs, which you present without evidence."

Alchemy, homeopathy and Wahhabi Islam were once radical new ideas, that doesn't mean they were good. Beware of labeling ideas as 'enlightened' simply because they are new. If you support the choice of gender identity, then you deny the existence of sexuality. You have to choose one. You cannot be gay if you walk into a gay bar and have no idea what anyone's chosen gender is. The whole non-binary argument is based on nothing more than sexist stereotypes. If you say you are non-binary because you don't conform to those stereotypes, all you are doing is reaffirming your belief that they must be true of other people. I'll give you another example; saying black teenagers carry knives is a negative stereotype. The correct response to which is to say that you don't carry a knife just because you're a black teenager. Your argument is the equivalence of saying, 'I don't carry a knife, therefore I'm not black'. You're not a woman because you don't wear dresses and nail polish? Well, you try telling a feminist that. The only people upset about genitals are the people who wish to deny the existence of biological sex. I'm perfectly happy with 500 million years of evolution via sexual reproduction, just stop telling me I need to believe something else that you can't even explain.

The Nagasaki Nesta returns! Probably the best backup CB we’ve ever had at Saints, couldn’t ask for a more model professional.

I respectfully ask that you adhere to my wish to be refered to in the second person pronoun of 'yarp', rather than 'you'. The difference being LGB people don't need to cut off parts of their body in order to be able to live with themselves. You can explain homosexuality, rationally and (if you wanted to) with clear evidence. I didn't want to put words in your mouth but I knew that argument was coming. There isn't a rough prison, school or neighbourhood in the world where anything close to 40% of people try to kill themself. The natural flight or fight reaction to danger is almost invariably to desperately try and escape that situation alive. I probably went to secondary school with 2,000 pupils across all the other years. Some of those students would have been regularly threatened at knifepoint on their estate, beaten senseless by their alcohol step dad, neglected by their prostitute drug addict mum or as you say, struggled with coming out as LGB (if it's 1 in 5 that's 400 students). I knew of one suicide the whole time I was there and that was a guy who'd left school, gone to uni and couldn't keep fighting his own internal demons, not even bullying related. I'm not trying to be rude but that's the kind of rationalising and rephrasing that just sounds like denial. Like saying people with alcohol problems aren't alcoholics, they just need alcohol in order to function normally. However you want to phrase it, all those issues are intrinsically linked to people with BDD.

But that's not the issue at all and it's indicative of why this has become such a highly charged political point, even if it's an incredibly tedious one. You can identify, dress, sleep with etc. whoever you like, all people are asking for is the right not to be involved. It comes down to a simple case of Hitchen's razor; you can have all the gender stuff, I'll give you the word 'gender' and you can identify as whatever you like on the proviso that I never have to pay any interest in it, like I don't with people's religions, diets or star signs. I'm perfectly happy with refering to people only by biological sex, when society deems it decent. The problem is that this right to refer to proven facts is now being eroded and people wont stand for it. Even people like Richard Dawkins, who has spent his life fighting against dogma, bigotry and voting liberal, is now under attack. Bringing it back on topic, Labour would be best served saying that the only thing they will legislate by is the proven biological definition of sex and leave it at that.

So the massive correlation with anxiety, depression, substance abuse, the need to surgically remove perfectly healthy organs and take testosterone blockers (even though it's definitely not biological) and the 40% attempted suicide rate are, in your view, entirely coincidental?

None of that is a definition of anything. If you believe sex and gender are different then you have to accept that: You aren’t assigned a gender at birth and you only have one if you choose to have one. What’s bemusing there is people who claim to be non-binary are effectively saying they don’t identify as something they’ve made up. I don’t choose to identify as a man and I’m not attracted to anyone based on gender. IF you want these rules to apply, then I am by definition a non-binary pan sexual and so are 99% of people. If sex and gender are different then there should be no issue at all. Separate society, where necessary (I.E. prisons, sports, changing rooms) based on sex and say that all genders are welcome in, for E.g. a woman’s changing room. The problem is that the very people who are insisting that they are different then immediately conflate the two by campaigning for the male sex who gender identify as female to be allowed in women’s spaces. Well, which is it? Are they the same thing or not?

There is no second definition of what a woman is, that’s precisely the problem they’ve got. They’re trying to stand on principals they can neither define, explain nor identify.