Ivan Katalinic's 'tache

I assume we can sign Solly March outside of the window, if we even want to, given he’s a free agent? Would give us some scope to see if someone does come in for Edozie at the last minute?

Watford have signed someone from Udinese. That’s a surprise.

Bree Norwegian Schlott Manning would be better?

Sadly our approach has been to take whichever girl is happiest to drop her knickers for an easy ride and it’s left us with a number of diseases.

Excellent Championship CB with top class shithousery. Will miss the latter more if we can secure a solid replacement like Falchener. Can’t blame him for wanting to go for Champions League football and the Premier League. I just hope he has a better unit around him than the rubbish Russell Martin left him with when we went up so we get the chance to see if he’s genuinely decent at Prem level or not.

Dear Tonda, just to be clear, signing a left footed CB and getting rid of our 2 back up right backs is not an excuse to go 3 at the back with Capt Jack as a sweeper and Fellows as a wing back. We’ve seen it before and it sucks. Massively. Is this clear??

Step forward the next incarnation of Jack Stephens - raiding full back!

Deal is dependent on Chris Makin also coming in to replace Mads Roerslev, if he goes on loan. Deal's on a knife edge, to be fair.

Hmmm. Chaos with Jack who's been here years or chaos with Keven who's been here hours? I pick the latter.

I love the fact the media felt it needed to give a name to the main perpetrator and has gone with Clicky Ponting.

Sounds a brilliant player if he can score 3 goals from just 2 shots. Must get this one over the line…

“Dave, have you got 5 mins to do the new Saints shirt?” “Stuff that, got it done in under a minute 👍“

Went well in terms of the games we did admit to spying on! 😅

Absolutely this. My son’s birthday is on Saturday and this was one of his presents and probably the thing he was looking forward to most. In the grand scheme of things to most people this only means something to us but I’m sure it’s a scenario which will playing out right across the fan base. If they can extricate themselves from being expelled then fine but it doesn’t change the fundamental fact we cheated and heads should roll and the owner should strongly consider the type of club he runs (and potentially sell up). His tenure has been nothing short of an disaster and if he thinks we have any confidence in the clowns running the club to get the decision overturned, he’s more of a fool than I thought.

Maybe it’s time for the first ever three way scarf?

Alternatively maybe do one of the half time relays to sort out our guilt. Saints staff vs EFL. Need a 6 man team: Parsons, Eckert, Solak, Spors, Salt & Sammy Saint for me. Not sure who the EFL would bring. Panel member in goal and Benny Hill music to set the scene.

EFL: “The independent disciplinary panel has determined that Southampton FC is guilty of breaching the regulations of which they have been accused. We have agreed the panel will reconvene in a fortnight to determine the appropriate level of punishment.”

This has all the hallmarks of a “send the unpopular email out at 5.31 on a Friday” moment.

So is he

Would be classic Saints to watch Ross go off to the World Cup out of contract, have a stormer and sign for someone else. He’s done enough to get a new deal with his form since January whatever Division we are in n IMO.

If we are booted out, do we have to give the tickets back? Middlesbrough v Hull at Wembley with Saints and Hull fans in the stadium both hating on Boro could be fun.

Surely the panel would have been earning at least double time for working on a Sunday? Bit of an oversight if they’ve missed out on that 🤦‍♂️

I just wish they’d hurry up. It’s my son’s birthday on Saturday and I really need to know whether my refund will come through in time to find him another present which could be equally disappointing.

Message from Tonda: he’s asked if they can zoom in a little and focus on any peculiarities compared to how Hull normally line up.