pap

Touché, mate. Made me chuckle.

Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth.

Jan Molby says that Liverpool should be wary of Lovren's antics:- https://uk.eurosport.yahoo.com/blogs/jan-molby/why-liverpool-must-wary-dejan-lovren-antics-122303740.html

Alas Wade, I'm the man that's about to provide a bit of context to your visit. From the exaggerated tone of your account, which I do not dispute, it sounds like they thought you were a suggestible southern simpleton they would have as a pet for a few hours so they could fill your head with shít. I've seen it before. Confused chaps walking around the city centre asking for the location of the third tunnel, the Americans thinking they own a piece of the Southport to Seacombe suspension bridge, or even the simple woolybacks that meant to go to Manchester and were let down by a combination of poor literacy and pot luck on the platform. Easy marks, one and all. Day to day scousery is much more mundane, I can assure you. The spiciest celebrity nugget I've ever heard was from ms pap's dad, who reckons he knew Cilla back in the day and that she put it about. It was not a surprise surprise.

It doesn't surprise me that this is what you took from my comment. I get better bang for my shortarsed buck up here.

I want to go to Liverpool, and so does my wife!

Yeah, me too:- Field Music, Tones of Town In Context A Gap Has Appeared Closer At Hand Queensryche, Operation : Mindcrime Revolution Calling Operation: Mindcrime Speak Rage Against The Machine Bullet In The Head Know Your Enemy Wake Up The Strokes The Modern Age Soma Barely Legal Michael Jackson Thriller Beat It Billy Jean Arcade Fire Suburbs Ready To Start Modern Man Art Brut Alcoholics Unanimous DC Comics and Chocolate Milkshakes The Passenger U2 Where the streets have no name With or Without You I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking for AC/DC Rock n roll singer The Jack Livewire Pearl Jam Once Even Flow Alive Why Go Jeremy Black (yeah, Ten really is that good )

It looks like a load of yokels having a fight with some guests at a wedding party (that didn't bother to turn up). Well, I'm not sure I'd agree with that. We like our bars lively, our women chatty and a bit more to do at 2am in the morning than fend off alcohol-fuelled pugilists at the taxi ranks. I don't like the way that LFC have gone about their business and have been encouraged to see some old skool LFC fans decrying Lovren's activities on Twitter.

Robots would not be useful for this task, Bear. As Lt Commander Data shows, they are low on emotion and big on logic. We're good on the emotion. A robot would have no problem banging on a pensioner's door to sell them a financial product to use in the fictive financial system. They could bang all night if they wanted to. Robots do not sleep. However, the robot would probably shut down in a shower of blue sparks if asked to justify the position, or explain what it was exactly that it did. The OP needs a merciless cúnt, not a mechanised automaton.

Is it? Will it look cool 250 miles up the road where no-one fúcking cares?

It'll be our Paulsgrove incident. They'll smash up the closest McDonalds and claim they were "Lovren" it.

Potentially, but will probably be more of a "be seen to be doing something" than actually doing something. Brittan himself is the subject of accusations. There are potentially ruinous implications for the establishment if some of the bigger names are mentioned.

Gaff = layman's term for abode. e.g. "You want to come around to my gaff for some tea and scones?" Gaffe = something Prince Philip says:- "Looks like it's been made by an Indian", etc.

Brr. Brr. Is this thing still on? Loads to report on PC gaming this year. Still working my way through Walking Dead, Season 2. This is episodic, so completion is not for the want of trying - I just have to wait until the next episode is released before resuming play. In a very similar category, The Wolf Among Us is well worth a mention. By the same people, featuring the same style of gameplay ( choices through dialogue, branching paths, etc ) and set in Fabletown, an area of New York set aside for population by "Fables" like Snow White, Tweedledee and Tweedledum and Ichabod Crane. If I were Dubai Phil, I'd be asking what the writers were smoking at this point Both blur the lines between TV and gaming more readily than anything else I've played. Well recommended; both on other platforms too. The other really big game of note has to be Hearthstone, a free-to-play card collecting game from Blizzard, previously responsible for Starcraft, Diablo and World of Warcraft. Content-wise, Hearthstone is informed by the latter. Every card in Hearthstone is from the Warcraft universe. Every game is a fantasy-themed bout to knock the other guy out. Few games offer the opportunity that Hearthstone does though; the chance to win by being gloriously smart, lucky or both. I've played games of its ilk in their physically manifested form, such as Dominion. I've even played electronic versions of established card games, such as Ascension. Hearthstone doesn't really have a physical equivalent to tie it down, making it a much better game. I'm reminded of Devil Crush and Alien Crush, two relatively obscure pinball videogames that had no real life alternatives. The game designers were able to fill their completely invented pinball tables up with HR Giger inspired aliens and legions of hell. Same thing goes for Hearthstone. It can only really be what it is because it is a videogame. Well worth your time, and on iPad too.

I only discovered this today, but today is apparently "Tell the Truth" day. On one hand, it's a sad indictment of the duplicitious and mendacious nature of our fúcking species. On the other, it's an opportunity for a bit of fun and discussion. So SaintsWebbers. Anything you'd like to get off your chests?

Very important. I've never looked for a job in a JobCentre. I work in IT and use the big portals, like jobsite or jobserve.

I think you have a point with Poch. He spent 2m just to get out of Southampton. Could have organised a good few illegal raves on that money. NI is a bit different. Any "scandal" can lead to loss of vital components, such as kneecaps, etc. I decided that a boring life of being a fat bastard was for me.

Isn't Ochoa still a free agent?

Well, if 3m XBox One owners are anything to go by, people can be convinced of ANYTHING with the right amount of marketing and a suitable lack of sense

It's what happens when you live somewhere boring. I put on two stone while living in a 10K town in Northern Ireland.

Trialling my new "photo-lip-reading" routines* * routines do not actually exist. It's all a lark, like.

May well go to Everton, just like all those other players were going somewhere else before they eventually signed. According to Twitter, he has been excluded from a friendly. Make of that what you will.

Probably one of the most worrying seasons in recent memory, due to all the upheaval. The watchword is unproven. Koeman hasn't managed here before, three of our best known players have done the offs, with possibly more to follow. Koeman is likely to raid the Eredivisie, so most of our incoming players will be unproven in the PL too. Then there's the question of whether we can knit all of this into some semi-functioning team. The spine of the team hasn't completely gone. Lallana could be famine and feast, as we all know. Rickie had his off days. I am genuinely gutted to have lost Shaw, especially as it seemed we'd finally cracked the left-back conundrum and the winger problem in one player. If player sales are stemmed now, I think we can get quality replacements. Even if Morgan and Lovren end up going for silly money, we can replace them. The only real problems are getting team cohesion and other clubs taking the píss because they know how much money we've got. Make no mistake though, they could be big problems. I'm fully prepared for a long dark November.

Not entirely convincing. Both are selling clubs, and when they do spend big, it's normally because someone has just given them a large wedge for one or more of their players. http://www.soccerfame.com/transfer_table/team/borussia-dortmund http://www.soccerfame.com/transfer_table/team/atletico-madrid It's about net spend and successfully managing player turnover. Both of those clubs are models in how to do it right - Dortmund have made record profits this year. And yes, things are different. Big woop. Take a gold star for pointing out the fúcking obvious, chaps. We don't have enough of that around here. However, given Saints position of being able one of the few clubs that consistently produces high value talent ( and crucially, negotiates big fees ), maybe it's worth looking beyond 80,000 people and the unique characteristics of the Ruhr to see what they're doing right.

All very good, but entirely lanced with one statement. The price is what the market will bear.