SNSUN

Yes to all. Though musically I do wish they'd **** off.

Read the following with that fact that I was always a fat kid and not great at football... Highlights - Age 10, playing a friendly match during a PE lesson, I tipped a powerful shot over the bar in goal. Even more spectacular was that I was a shortarse until my growth spurt. - Age 14, on the edge of the box, I span to hit a shot, connected perfectly, and smashed it off the crossbar and in. Amazed my fellow pupils. - Aged 15 during an indoor 5-a-side football league, my (not very good) team "Yip Pulse" destroyed rival team "The Strikers Factory" 4-0, myself getting man of the match for some amazing saves and keeping a clean sheet (although as I was the reporter post-match, I gave myself that title...) - Aged 18 I finally made it into a proper school team, becoming the 3rd XI captain. The 3rd XI was made up of choirboys (me) fat people (me) and people that hated football (not me). As captain it was up to me to pick the team. I just about scraped together eleven players. We lost 10-1 in our only match. Still, we'd have got caned more if it hadn't been for our keeper, a gloveless Chinese boy who knew squat about football, myslef at centre back (captain's performance) and an American who must've run a hundred miles around the pitch. - Aged about 26 during a kickaround at Goals Heathrow, I back-heel nutmegged my mate. Lowlights - The 10-1 defeat - Breaking the Scaphoid in my hand trying to save a shot from my mate who had been a Watford youth goalkeeper about 15 years ago - Running out of energy 2 minutes into a recent park kickaround, due to fags, booze, overeating etc etc - ...and pretty much every other time I've ever played football in my whole life...

I predicted two defeats at the start of this season and so far it seems we're playing well but not getting the points. Bring on a few easy teams that we can spank, and let's see where we are at Christmas.

I know a guy that uses "bonjour". To give him his dues, he is French.

I have a mate that says "'Sup" every time we see him. Deserves a slap. I'm more of a "hey" kind of guy...

Today - All day at Thorpe Park. Free entry, great weather and shorter queues/less people than I was expecting! Tomorrow - Work then Saints. Sunday - Work then sod all.

Damn straight! Made the last series worth watching anyway!

Masturbation makes you go blind you know...

I don't deal in coins.

No you cannot. It's mean and it makes me cry.

Baj. I'd get more respect around here...

Going to the toilet is an inconvenience so I only go when I need to, about once every couple of days.

I'm still playing this one too. Loans help you out A LOT and there is no number of how many foreign loans you can bring in either. Mostly you can get them wage-free too so stock up! Each game is different though, but I'll have a look at who I signed when I got Saints promoted and get back to you.

After watching I-Robot I don't intervene with bag snatchers anyway, in case they're being useful...

Saints 1 - Brum 3 Yet in spite of that I'm quietly confident we have the quality to spring a suprise...

Can I just say, this has to be the worst, most boring series of Big Brother ever. Utter cack. Now I usually watch BB, and I even went so far as buying a freeview box this year, but I switched off after about the third week. Rubbish.

You could have run after him, yelled out and called him a c*n*, then when he's riled up enough and running towards you with the intention of beating you to a pulp, you could have run back toward the lady. I think of everything.

I do it, I didn't say I'm any good at it!

All my pockets have a special place for things, and if I reach the usual pocket for, say, my phone, and it's not there because I've put it in another pocket, I panic. Everytime I walk past a mirror, I stop to check my face for spots or blackheads. (Even at work or shopping or whatever, though more discreetly...) I also cannot pick up a phone mid-ring. I am a human spell check - I proof read everything I write. Every single clock or watch in my possession is set 5 or ten minutes fast. It makes me move quicker before work. + Many, many more.

I can't believe I outran a fat lady and two fat men.

Oo er that's a bit on the big size... Sorry people.

Ok, I didn't take this photo, which you can tell because it's in daylight - but this is where I am at work - this is actually exactly where I smoke when skiving off.

As I see it, the meaning of life is to make others happy. This is a rather unselfish perspective on the age old question, but one that I try to adhere to.

You're still a registered user. Unless you paid Baj £10 and told him that you wanted to stay that way...

I am a grade six violist, a grade five pianist and a grade A plonker. True story.