Whitey Grandad

On a slightly different note, I saw a sign in Australia: 'abseiling office upstairs'.

Our local library has a sign saying 'this door will not open automatically unless you press the button'. Work that one out.

What do you do when the child insists on undoing its seatbelt and trying to open the car door on a motorway? Or trying to get a closer look at that train passing through the station?

I can't see the Football League making an exception to allow the club to pick and choose which football creditors they deign to pay. All or nothing is the only possible option, else it would set a dangerous precedent for the League. It's their competition and they set the rules.

Indeed, but I can't really see what all the fuss is about. They call it phone hacking but anyone with a brain must realise that these voicemail systems are virtually public documents.

It's NHS newspeak.

Entering New York last year we were all 'immigrated'. I call the process 'immigratificationalisation'. A company I know very well produces the patient registration systems for doctors' surgeries. The welcome screen says 'touch the screen to arrive for your appointment'. When I had a problem the girl behind the desk said 'I can arrive you manually'.

How much for the lot of them?

Surely the PPs will not go to the club for them to decide what to do with them? They will be diverted by the PL to the appropriate claimants.

I'd be surprised if we were considering letting him go without first sorting out a replacement. On his best form he could hack it in the PL.

Wow factor.

Lack of playing time is my concern.

Lead in petrol has been replaced by benzene, which is horribly carcinogenic.

Lead in petrol has been replaced by benzene, which is horribly carcinogenic.

Not important though, is it?

Not important though, is it?

It went way past my bedtime and I'm only 63 (just).

We towed the caravan there a good few years back. Camping Joker. We remember it with affection.

Sometimes in a safety-critical situation nothing else will work, but now that I'm old I wish I hadn't.

Rose to a crescendo.

I once paid a few quid to choose my seat on a Flybe trip to Dublin. On the return there were only a handful of us on the plane and because of the lumpy weather the captain made us all sit under the wings. I never got my money back.

The last time I flew with Easyjet two years ago the ordinary bods were queuing at the gate an hour before boarding.

There's a big queue.

Works for me.

On Virgin Media all the BBC Olympic channels are grouped above sports. The cycling yesterday was 522.