Verbal

It was in an email sent to all Saints fans. Didn't you get it? Actually, Cortesse said all fans would be excited except OBS. Why he'd single you out escapes me - but there you go, a fact's a fact.

He and um pahars have consummated their friendship and disappeared off into the sunset together, never to be heard from again.

You are a mystery wrapped in a conundrum. What does that mean? (I'm also smiley-face blind - never did understand them).

So some of those 'lots of positions' wouldn't need players?

...gloating?

Maybe no one's touched on it because, no matter how much we might take some glee from their misfortune, there's bound to come a time - especially these days - when a Prem club faces the unthinkable and is taken out altogether. And the way things are going, P*mpey look like being that team. I really hope not - I'd miss the rivalry, such as it is at the moment. But...

Only if you read the OP.

"Yes."

Yep, we can give you him, tommac, Helpmerhonda, the 'other' wacko jacko, Wilde, Lowe, Askham... Any one of them could do a job for you.

Well, we're not first scorers in the League. Gillingham are one up.

I don't know, Daren. The way you pose the original question, surely only a dufus would answer: P*mpey. Perhaps it would be fairer to compare our actual position in League 1, -10, new minted, honest owner, etc, with a Southampton in a parallel universe: with an 'owner' in property development from the land of the mother of all property collapses, millions in debt, including a £35 million payment due any day, a squad being decimated by the football equivalent of a Woolworths closing down sale, a stadium that could actually be improved with a few judicious swings of a wrecking ball...and Premiership status at a time when, the big four or five aside, it seems the top division has an unusually high number of relegation candidates?

Good grief, OBS. Since we're asking questions, what state are you going to be in if Millwall.. (and I hesitate to say this for fear of causing you psychological damage)... win? Judging from the above, you'll be posting at a pitch that only dogs can hear.

The logic of all this escapes me somewhat. If the only reason someone didn't buy a season ticket last year because they boycotted the club under Lowe, why on earth would they continue to boycott it now?

What was this thread about again?

Wrong. Alpine is now one of us happy clappy clowns.

Seems Stefanovic is still recovering from a serious knee injury. Given our track record, I suppose it would make sense to go for another one-legged centre back. Or hopefully not.

I've just seen that, you cheeky b*gger.

What happened to your status, trousers? I can't believe you'll be able to contain yourself to three posts a day for more than five minutes.

You mean Lowe has just reverse-taken over?

I'm sorry but that's too complacent by half. The Luton example is a pretty good illustration of that. The fact that football clubs fall into administration has everything to do with the insane economics of the game. To take one example, the blindingly high wages dangled in front of players at the top - £250,000 a week offered to a defender with a bad back! - invariably trickle down to wage demands further down the food chain. Hence our problems, I suspect, in getting new signings in that are of the quality to get us out of this league. The pressures on football clubs are immense and have never been greater. The solution to these problems does not lie, ultimately, in punishing smaller, less powerful clubs, but in tackling the rich and powerful and forcing the Man Citys and Chelseas of this world to put their house in order for the greater good of the game. Will that happen? No, if it's down to the FA...

Actually it was worse than that. The new regime at Luton reported the financial misdemeanours of the old regime after studying the books. The FL responded by punishing the new owners. Brilliant - but what do you expect from an organisation led by a dimwit with an deeply unpleasant political record for mendacity?

Our transfer budgey is an ex-budgey. It has gone to meet its maker.

We have officially split into two factions. The girly men - who are having fainting fits at the failure to sign budget-busting players in an almighty hurry and have written off the season before a football is kicked in anger. (Membership secretary: Original Bournemouth saint) And the common-sense brigade, who are prepared to wait and see. (We accept anyone) You decide.

There's no reason why the club can't conclude a deal with Jaidi before going to appeal. That's the usual way of doing things - a 'subject to work permit' agreement. If the club doesn't do this, it suggests AP has other players in mind and doesn't want to deal with the potential hold-ups associated with an appeal. If so, this is more of an example of the club trying to move things on quickly than being chronically slow.

I'm disappointed that Gillett's player profile fails to carry the 'FFS' Saintsweb logo. I thought we'd discussed this.