Hatch

Never even been to Japan or anywhere near it..

Gala Evening. 3.55 Cheltenham

I don't understand

People wearing big headphones that make them look like Cybermen.

are they not contradictory

Why Darren Fletcher plays for Man Utd

Don't watch it. I don't want to make my preconceived ideas of what scum Northerners are any worse than they are already.

Has it been raining? It is gloriously sunny where I am.

Gaily Noble 4.20 Beverley

Gerrard not even in squad. Think I'll watch the Barca game now

Who decides when easter is?

one zero to Liverpool

It was rubbish.

The people I see eating the food in supermarkets prior to payment are not being cultured. They are , as Barney Trubble said, just rude , ignorant, mannerless scum.

Duckworth/Lewis Wearing tracksuits in public (other than for sporting reasons) Vegetarians Kenny Dalglish Why people use phone sex chat lines at £1.50 per minute.

Jade Goody 'Fans'

Weights. I think I must have been off school the day the teacher taught weights. I have a complete mind block when it comes to weights and just do not understand them at all. They mean nothing to me.

That doesn't help.

Planes . How do they stay up in the air?

No he isn't, he is +1, on the cut line

I can't believe I clicked on a link titled funnycatvideos, what the hell was I thinking. Shame on me.

No problem with these sort of games for deserving causes. But buying David Hughes a new car isn't one of them. (or whatever)

Testimonials should have stopped 20 years ago.

finished at -7, was -9 after 15

Essien was immense last night. Gerrard never had a touch.