Wade Garrett

Sorry I didn’t add value. I’ll try much harder next time.

He’s just like everyone else’s fake mates.

I’ve just spoken to my Flamenco supporting mate. He said - you give him the ball, he go here, here, here, here, goal! Only joking, he’s a reserve, can’t get in the team and we’re trying to pull your pants down.

I’m not desperate to keep him, but why replace him with someone worse?

Can’t see it. It’s like trying to buy a car and trying to trade an old banger in for £10k.

Tell me what the fucking point is in selling Alcaraz and getting a player worse than him in return. Tell them if they haven’t got the cash for the deal to take a walk. We don’t want their shit cast-offs.

Sorry, edited now.

As good as he seems to be, the do have reservations about signing yet another player with a poor injury record.

Any chance they could pay another £10m for Bazunu!

Doing a few years business in advance because they’re facing another transfer ban.

Devasted.

We’ve just signed Big Les for that job though.

You’d know.

My tailor actually said while he was measuring my inside leg ”Ooh, Jason Steele, suits you sir. Magnificent pair of hands and such delicate feet”. I don’t give a fuck what Farmer’s bumpkins said about him.

Town Quay and Southampton Central? Walk you lazy bastards.

My tailor and my hairdresser are both Brighton STH and they reckon Steele is like Pele with the ball at his feet and Shilton with it in his hands.

Wow, 2 assists in 20 games and an average of 5.7 forward passes per game. Waste of money.

We’ve got a better Archer than Robin Hood. Going to really announce ourselves back into the Premier League. 2-0, fuck off Forest.

It’s a risk we can’t afford to take.

Tyre-kickers.

That would be too much of a risk to take late in the window.

You talk complete shit when it comes to Bazunu. He’s a fucking terrible shot stopper and we’re a better side without him.

McCarthy is a competent keeper. But with the ball at his feet, he’s the kid that always got picked last because he’s fucking shite.

I would argue that Armstrong and Diaz aren’t centre-forwards. Meaning we have Tall Paul, Stewart, Mara and Archer. If we get rid of Mara and Tall Paul that leaves Stewart and Archer. Stewart seems to be permanently injured that leaves Archer. I would like another centre-forward.

Then we’ll get relegated.