JohnnyFartPants

Course they are and course she is. Keep the faith.

Your argument does fall down slightly in that there are just as thick people in many other walks of life, many of these being filled by ex bouncers and squaddies, thus proving they can do another job.

It would seem that '06 was a good year for both the w**k and bean flick. It is out there as a leader so far.

I bet he does!!

I had my best ever w**k in 1997. It had everything a 31 year old looks for in one.

I think it must have been in 1997.

Whilst you would feel insulted to be mistaken for a person under 18, it is not until you realise that Tesco have a "Challenge 25" programme in operation. This means that if the person serving you suspects that you could be under 25, they will ask for ID because some 17 year olds can look as old as 25.

I could make you feel very happy about this if you wanted me to.

Do not mention it Stevo. You gayer product wearing modern "man" excuse of a body.

It sounded exactly like a joke. Christ on a bike, it wasn't hard to read the jokey tones in it. The only people that would not recognise that as a joke would be Geography teachers and dinlos.

You come across as a prize **** mate. No offence.

As you don't mind talking about your private life, can I ask who left who? He is acting like a hurt man, IMO. Were you boning his best mate and then left him for a woman? That would really mess him up.

I think I blame her too.

Oh, I don't know. Look at all the things that Christopher Biggins puts up his bottom.

Depends what mood he is in. If he gets in a bi-polar downward spiral then he can sit in the garden on his own eating a bag of chips.

Mods didn't really listen to Elvis. He was more rock and roll.

Have you tried rubbing some of your girly products into your knee? It might help but if not you can just feel better about yourself.

Well it is only right that those brave men should be protected against causing death or brain damage to young men out on the ****. Years ago I was out drinking with a real hard case among us. He was an ex heavyweight boxer that was offered a pro contract but decided for himself that he would never be much more than a journeyman boxer, so just stayed a good amatuer. To cut a long story short, when he was in his 40's he looked a bit round around the tummy but still had all the skill he learnt over the years. It was fantastic seeing bouncer after bouncer being knocked down/out by him as he calmly made his way to the door to leave.

When did that happen?

Bouncers do a very important job. When I was in my early twentys there were so many different ways to get yourself beaten up but Nanny State Britain has sadly done away with these. It is left to the good old fashioned bouncers to keep up this tradition of punching young blokes in the head, and bloody well they do it too. If we don't support these brave men in black then the whole fabric of our country will slowly be destroyed.

Elvis had Aaron for a second name. Does that make him half gay and half a thief?

It was good. I really like the bloke and to be honest I want to start a petition to make him the next Dr Who.

It's about 1 minute 45 seconds in. http://fliiby.com/file/132244/d0dm49foct.html

Did anyone watch it and was it just me or was the normally very clever and witty Stephen Fry drunk as a skunk?

Does that make it a misspell?