Crouchie's Lawyer

Erm, im sure there are far worse jokes in the world jillyanne

I think he looks better that way though. He looks less cross!

Do I get an award?

All my criteria? I merely answered the question someone asked of me why I would want to go to Pompey? I stated that the Hospital is closer to where I live as opposed to going into Soton. I like it around here as I was born here. I lived in Thornhill, then Sarisbury Green then Wickham. Its a nice area and is a half way between the countryside and civilization which is what I like. I get the impression Basingstoke is more of a city

I bet he was goin' like a train....

That made me lol. I was wondering what was gonna happen, thought she would 'exorcist' hurl all over the place though

The house is on Titchfield Lane yes. And you rightly state that its opposite the golf course. However, the speed limits up until about 1 year ago were National Speed limit and are now 40 mph. It is only 30 mph going from Titchfield Mill toward Wickham up until the motorway bridge as soon as you pass the first lot of nurseries which is about 1 mile before this house. The roads are not bad, but yes some people do tend to drive along them quite quickly. Different strokes for different folkes, I just happen to like the place. Its set in a nice woodlandy kind of area too.

Happy Bday Si, only 3 months and 5 days older than me! You old git

Mentos as in the mints?

Fareham cinema is a lot less (believe it or not) skanky than Odeon or Leisure world. Last time I went to either, they were horrific. Popcorn and spilt drinks everywhere. I dont often go to Pompey but its the ability to get there more so than the desire. For example, getting to the hospital. It is easier to get to Pompey (yes I am fully aware of the added risks in catching something from a hospital in skatesville).

Are you asking for the postcode or telling me thats how you know its a crap location?

Citibank do one... http://www.citibank.co.uk/personal/banking/saveinvest/saving/fsaver/splash/index.html?source=3663&gclid=CL-U1fDc8ZUCFQuH1QodIHspfg Seems pretty good, but ING as Scud says is probably the best http://www.ingdirect.co.uk/savings/Default.asp?ct=1

Do you actually know where that is? Very close to Wickham Golf Course, just far enough away from the Cities and town's (Southampton, Fareham & Portsmouth) yet not too far you cant get to any. I would live there over most places in Hampshire any day of the week. Why do you think its a crap location?

As a child I found it difficult to share my 25p mix up bag of sweets with my sister, there is no way I would share 50 million penny sweets with the whole of Africa! That wouldnt leave me with many or indeed any!

Yes, they are also known as Children in Need

Hopefully from a House which will cause you great pain

If you base the car insurances on £2k per month, house keeper at £1k per month, cost of house keeping and food etc £1k per month then that leaves me with £7k per month. Yes there will be one off's where I would spend £x here and have to use 'next months' interest to cover it, but equally, there maybe months where I am travelling through outer Mongolia and spending 13p per day so its swings and roundabouts.

Seriously? Fair play to you if you would. I would probably leave some to charity when I die but I certainly wouldnt be able to part with the whole £5m after winning it. Do you do the lottery?

Jump then

Hmmm, possibly, however earning £178k gross p.a should see to it that I could afford to holiday all over the show. I think rather than stick to one destination, I would want to travel to loads of different places.

What Sushi-cide?

Go on...

What would you do? I would buy this house http://www.rightmove.co.uk/viewdetails-16185076.rsp?pa_n=1&tr_t=buy&mam_disp=true Reckon I could get it for £1.5m, would probably spend £250k doing a few extra bits to it, I would want a pool, sauna and steam room. I'd spend £500k on cars too, with a nice sports car as well as a top of the range Range Rover or Audi Q7. That would leave me with £2.75m. I would invest this into a bank account which would give me a rate in the region of 6.50% (I'm sure you could get better). This works out (before tax) at £178.5k p.a interest which I would more than confortably live off. I'd employ a full time maid/cook too to run around after me. I would certainly retire now. Sod working for another 40 years! If inflation got to the point where my money wasnt worth a great deal sat in the bank, I would probably return to work then but for the time being I would happily live like a king!

Ill get slated but... The Streets new album