Crouchie's Lawyer

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Oh, such a f*cking comedian arent you. I wish I was as funny and as bald as you. Mr know it all.

Dont worry SNSUN, im sure they will find the cure soon...

Happy bday anyway mate!

Oh? F*cking b*tch, I genuinely believed her as it was someone she knew, not a friend of a friend's Aunty's Granny's dog's friend. I am gullible, although she sounded very sincere when she told me. Good story though

Dressing up like a complete tw*t gets attention from girls. FACT. Girls will talk to you more and providing you arent a complete pleb with no personality, it increases your chances in scoring. That or it was a stag do

Yep, it had to be. It was a family friend of someone I used to work with. Jilleh, just because its been in the papers, doesnt mean the people involved dont have friends?!

Point proven. It thought of Gerrard, not Le Tiss

Jodie Marsh is semi famous, and that is a question which is asked "is she famous?" to which i replied "Yes kind of". It got it wrong so I win. I bet it doesnt get Matt Le Tissier, im going to try it now...

True story... A girl I used to work with had a family friend who had a python. She took it to the vets after it hadnt eaten for 2 weeks and she got worried about it. It used to have free roam of the house and used to sleep curled up at the bottom of the bed (bit weird). The vets asked a series of questions to try and diagnose what was wrong with the snake. The final question was, 'where does the snake sleep?' to which the lady replied, "well its funny you should say, it normally sleeps curled up at the bottom of the bed, however, recently, it has slept on the bed, but stretched out next to me, long ways". The vet pondered for a second, then said "Im sorry to have to tell you, but we are going to have to put the snake down". The lady (being distrought) questioned why it had to be put down, fearing the worst, like it had cancer or something, to which the vet replied... "The reason why it hasnt eaten for 2 weeks is because it is starving itself, and the reason why it is laying stretched out next to you is because it is measuring itself against you, trying to work out if you will fit in him. He is planning on eating you!" True story

How the f*ckizzle you got that? She looks like she is in pain, rather than being tickled?!

Ah, Stevo, you still up!?

In one!

Doesnt. I was thinking of that Jordan Wannabee girl, blonde, name escapes me but it came up with Keeley Hazel. Nice picture though

Tis true. I am dead. Burnt to a crisp. And I can confirm there is an afterlife. They have wifi tinternet access too. Just walk to the white light and all is good. Im surrounded by ******es with no clothes and loads of alcohol and drugs. I am now called Saint-Im_no_sinner

Cheeky get. I am strategically spamming/contributing toward threads today, as im in a very busy office and shouldnt really be on innernetz. That and im having to desk jump like a nomad, so havent had computer access all day.

I have 1hr 4 minutes left

But the point is no one can know what you are or are not able to feel or see. So I may or may not miss them

Koala's carry chlamydia (sp?) so if your come back with that STI, we all know what you have been up to Cabbage!

Not afraid of death itself but afraid it will be painful and it always gets me to think I wont be able to see, feel, smell, hear etc anything every again. Ill miss all my family and friends etc

Im going to delight an angel with my sausage while she plays with my testicles

Thats a funny film if ever I have seen one. A lasy with a set of nashers in her va-jay-jay

Does he suck other things if you put them in the water?

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