SNSUN

More likely to have an OnlyFans than have ever set foot in a convent

Everton want to finish this in normal time. Come on Saints

BBD straight at their keeper.

Loch Ness Drogba on for AA. Man will score.

I'm going to put my neck on the line and just say it... ...neither of these teams is going to win the Premier League this season. I'd put money on it.

Dibling smashes it against BBD.

Pioneers of shirt fonts, dugouts and losing from winning positions.

We ask for trouble with this passing at the back.

Dibling, Downes and BBD coming on

My wife has hijacked Sky for Eastenders. I'm currently watching a bunch of wooden people that are hogging the camera but there's not much happening. Bit like watching Saints really.

So I was shopping in Staines the other day and a bloke walks up to me and says "You're in Staines." I said "I know I'm in Staines mate, I come here all the time." He says "No, urine stains" and pointed to my jeans. I'd pissed myself. I thought of that joke whilst being bored during large swathes of that first half.

They could demolish Goodison right now and nobody would make a noise. Deathly silent.

Les definitely has something about him. Once he settles in him, Downes and Fernandes could be a decent midfield. Lallana has looked quite tidy so far too. I said Smallbone earned his chance this year but already he's drooped down to 5th if not 6th choice.

Wood again trying to rape an Everton player.

Wood is a bit crap isn't he.

Captain fantastic

Goal THB!

Fuck me Everton nearly in again but offside. Cornet looks quick though.

New manager comes in: "So the idea is to keep the ball out of our net and put the ball in theirs." Saints players: "Ah thats what we've been doing wrong!" 🤪

AA booked

I'm giving it 5 more minutes before I let the wife watch Eastenders. Come on Saints ffs

Let them go 2 up and we'll do a Villa... ...says no Saints fan ever.

Crap. Crap crap. Crap crap crap.

Save McCarthy. Everton well into this game now, few aimless headers from us.