CB Fry

Chiquito.

Villa finished sixth three times in a row with a decent manager in charge, and made some decent progress in the Europa League. They were challenging for top four there or thereabouts in all three of those seasons. Sensible, successful. I suspect Everton will find out that level of achievement is tough to keep going season after season and it's a gaping money pit of doom. Villa also saw attendance numbers go down in their third sixth place season as fans got a sense of entitlement and boredom and sense of failure to not "get to the next level" (bit of that here these days). Sixth became zilch. Lerner started to think "well, fu ck that then you ungrateful Brummie pri cks". Cue living within their means and I believe he appointed Alex McCleish entirely for a laugh. We shall see how long Everton's sugar daddy can stay on this particularly unforgiving treadmill. Din Everton fans already think they are sky rocketing to the Champions League but they might be disappointed to find £1bn don't go that far.

I want a dapper manager with good hair.

I don't particularly want Howe. Moyes is cast iron solidity but pretty much guarantees us three consecutive 10th place finishes before we all implode with collective arse-aching boredom. Basically AVB or FDB or I top myself. We need a manager with a three initial name FFS.

A million little pieces it'll be smashed into. A million little Scott Dann shaped pieces.

That's one hell of a leap. SFC have engineered the entire thing now and helpless Ronald is in fact the victim forced to hoover up six million quid a year from Everton against his will? Great stuff. PS. Loads of managers and players quit clubs and are then subsequently hated by the fans left behind. It is not unique to SFC in any way shape or form.

What by calling you a din? That's up to him.

Not really. I love it when my football club does well. You and others are in raptures whenever things go wrong. #everysap

Crabby very quickly moved from his lies and hate phase very quickly to sobbing about why he's being "bullied". Solid forum gold.

Planet Cortese. Just a few saps who never got the "I told you so" moment they so desperately craved and just will not ever let go. It might be next season, it might be five years time, but the year we will have a dud season they will be on here partying in the street like it was Charles and Di's wedding. It's all gone wrong since the Cortese left, you know. We are failing we are we are we are we are. Why aren't we failing?

Good. If the next five managers use us a stepping stone to a bigger club then we will have had a phenomenally successful decade.

It's stats like that which makes me think he might join us - his league record is good but not outstanding and maybe the truly elite clubs have a couple of question marks about him. If it was unequivocal that he is the next great manager then obviously no chance but these little weaknesses make him everso slightly more likely to end up at SMS. We would give him the perfect platform to get a massive job next (if he feels Sevilla doesn't already give him that). Still feels virtually impossible but would be absolutely brilliant if it happened.

We haven't appointed Eddie Howe.

Quite right. Our team is almost entirely a Koeman team assembled, I'd say, almost identically to any other Premier League team - players primarily identified by the manager, sometimes identified by the boys in the lab. Evolving that into a team for the next guy may or may not be easy. Much like Koeman isn't going to turn Everton into us overnight either.

You two make such a sweet couple.

They haven't made any money out of us yet, six years on, but crack on.

Pointless. What if Emery will sign for 3 years for us but not 5? I know what I'd take.

Where?

Koeman on course to basically be the Dutch Mike Walker at Everton.

Not really practical with Ronald but I'd like to see us stick Erwin on enforced gardening leave (assuming he's on a similar contract and Ron wants him at Goodison). No Erwin you don't have permission to speak to Everton. Ask us again in 2017. We can afford to be petty here and there.

I think FDB's agent is the good angel agent who wanted RK to stay not the evil devil agent who wanted him to take the Everton cash.

We are the Everton to their Southampton. #elmeltdownio

So Guan is saying De Boer is not on the shortlist despite quite significant Dutchness, same agent as Koeman (as was) and general Black Box suitability?

Your guy will run out of money and interest quicker than Randy Lerner. If Koeman is taking a step up and Everton are aiming higher than we are, that's top 4 then. You won't do it. At best Top six a couple of times then your sugar daddy realises he's having to pump in £100m every frigging year and the fanbase start grizzling when you don't and then it all goes to sh it. Hopefully you will concentrate on getting the stadium built because your current toilet needs some work and that's what will really set you up, not ludicrously overpaying for a manager who is perfectly fine but not worth nigh-on Mourinho money. Good luck.

I doubt we will sell anyone to Everton, except maybe Wanyama who we just need to cash in on somewhere.