DT

With a decent manager he could be taught to be less headless and give the ball away less, so could turn out to be an asset for Swansea. Not for us though, so sell. I expect we'll get about 50% of what we should, given our desperate plight and the fact that all clubs know we're desperate to recoup anything at the moment. Need to insert a clause saying he can't play against us though if the sale goes through quickly. PS you have to question the judgement of someone who goes to a nightclub in Southsea

This is the single most profound thing I have ever read on this forum. Watching Saints does indeed become stretching weekje.

The end of the transfer window is almost upon us. I don't have any inside info but I'd say disaster would be if someone came in for Saga. I think we could live without Surman, so if we had to sell, that would be the one for me. Perhaps Swansea will want Dyer - might we take the cash and regret it when he scores against us? Lallana will stay I suspect as he's injured at the wrong time and Saggy chops' interest seems to have waned. Davis, one would hope, will also stay (he says grudgingly) as disruption in that area wouldn't be good unless we have a good replacement lined up (as if). Are we going to get this other striker in? What about Lupoli? Will we get a decent holding midfielder? Any thoughts? Any inside info, anyone?

I thought that was Kuntz - or was he German?

Dear Daily Echo. Please find out if McGoldrick has it in his contract that he must start. Because otherwise I don't understand it.

why the fook is McCrapp playing and Saga not?

Is Dailly playing?

No, really, Rupert. Forget those eye things - they now train your forehead up here with theesh new machines and it helpsh you win the foochball matches. I'll shell you a couple for a few guildersh.

1 lickle point. We were unlucky etc.

erm...anything about the 'new' 'striker'? Or was sweat more interesting?

Pathetic. Now Rupert is not even brave enough to face the press. Shame on you, Mr Lowe. Perhaps he is oiling Sir Clive's back on a sunbed as we speak.

Firesale Sam

Relegation, relegation, relegation.

At least before this we had a tiny hope that we'd get someone in who might be transformative. Now we have an arrogant tosser in Lowe's image.

The final insult, sneaked out on a Friday night.

Absolutely no motivation to the players wottesoever.

All too predictable. Cheap option again.

Exactly right. Granger used to play in goal for a club I used to play for, centuries ago.

Surely Dad's Army is Arthur Lowe, not Rupert? PS the club will not allow advertising around the pitch that says anything bad about the great emperor ruddy cheeks, obviously, now will it? Otherwise anything will help the cause... Best one is everyone wears black for next game, funeral etc.

Sounds like Rupert wrote this himself. Cut and paste job.

Oh dear. That means twice as many clueless tactical decisions. Twice as many passes without advancing. Twice as many non-sensical explanations. Twice as many 'sessions' with Rupert, no doubt. And twice as many people refusing to go and watch this shower of sheite.

This is the end.

No because he is doing a really good job with der boysh and we play good no? We just need a bit of luck...(and a manager, chairman, midfield, defence, attack, finance, a witch, endless Fridays, a takeover, a makeover, a takeaway and Playaway)

PPPS Rupert Lowe is a very poor people-person.

PPS Mr Lowe - you have no business acumen, are arrogant, and know nothing about football. Bet you are rubbish at hockey too.