Hatch

waste of tax payers money. Just kill it, it's only a cat FFS.

getting a virus on your laptop, costing 200 pound to fix and then everyone thinking it was because you were looking at porn.

I have 22, 23, 25, 26, 29, 30, 31th off

Speaking to nice women on the phone then meeting them and they are pig ugly. Just not on.

Talking of work, has anyone seen our secretary? She has disappeared. Didn't come into work last 2 weeks ago and we have not seen or heard of her since, just one email from her on the day saying that her mother in law was ill and she was going to visit her. Not heard from her since and her phone is switched off.

Burn her!

Just noticed he is playing now for Liga de Quito who will be playing in the Club World Cup Tournament with Man Utd out in Japan. Another player deemed not good enough for us (by some) but now playing at a level a million miles higher than we currently are. Also I thought he had been banned for a year or something for a punch up.

Is that the new Saints home and away kits?

Terry

Maybe your neighbour turned over to watch GMTV, and the frequency is the same on his remote. ( i have no idea how this works and even if it is possible)

This year - an Airfix model lorry - for a bloke who is a lorry driver and can bore for England . 5.99. last year for sister in law - An inflatable man with fixed vibrator. 9.99

and theres me thinking that Bob Monkhouse had died!

It is annoying. Cashpoints should be free to use for sixty seconds , but then charge 5 pounds a minute for every sixty seconds thereafter.

Have you been on Mars for the last 6 months

Fri - Stayed in Sat - Spend all day preparing for night out. Stayed in. Sun - Watched telly.

I think we blew it yesterday with the poxy run rate (as usual). We should have put the game beyond India by about the tea break on the 4 th day.

Why wasn't Campbell sent off for the assault on Owen when he scored the first goal? Unless kicking someone 6 feet in the air, 2 seconds after the ball has gone is now allowed.

or just Woolworths

Hunky Fireman calender

Chris Hoy. Right result IMO. Mclaren came second. Addlington Thrid.

I wish we had another 30 or 40 runs in the locker

Burnley are collapsing. Not scored for ages now

Probably the most ****ed I have ever been at a game. Didn't come home for two days after.

Fri - Sun. In hiding from Rozzers as I slashed up some paedo yesterday.

Eng all out for 316. India now on 37-3 Swann takes 2 wickets in his first ever over in test cricket. Nice one.