Convict Colony

Posted this on the Still thread so thought I'd chuck it on here, rough science based on the season so far.

Ask him how he comes up with his different tricks to beat his man (he is quality at making defenders look stupid) as I remember Ronaldinho used to find stuff on YouTube and practice it at training.

Just tell Vic that Lallana sent some Scouse criminals down to rob his house.

Have to say the only defectors I don't like are Lovren and Lallana for the way they went about forcing moves through. Lambert was a good deal for him so we said thanks for your service. Chambers/Shaw I think we quite happily made those moves given the money on offer.

Harry Kane is one of their own don't you know !

loving how stoked the bench and Elia and Big Vic were for the winner, proper happy.

yeah wasn't too bothered about the table as I just wanted to see what the average points performance was and what was required to beat our forecast total to try and see how plausible each team was, I think Liverpool really need to start winning a lot of games to have a chance.

Just wanted to update the stats for the current standings of the top 7 based on performance to date this season and try and give a semblance of who based on previous form is forecast to end where, for the purposes of this I am rounding down the forecast number. to 1 decimal place. I know there are play each other factors etc but I wanted to see what the average point return has been thus far and look at what they would need if all things being equal we meet our forecasted total. Chelsea - currently averaging 2.3pts a game - Forecast total - 88pts Man City - currently averaging 2pts a game - Forecast total - 77pts Saints - currently averaging 1.8pts a game - Forecast total 71pts Man U - currently averaging 1.8pts a game - Forecast total 69pts - They would need another 27pts to equal our forecast at 1.9 a game average which is 0.1 improvement on current form. Spurs - currently averaging 1.7pts a game - Forecast total 68pts - They need another 28pts to equal our forecast at 2pts a game average which is a 0.3pts improvement on their season. Arsenal - currently averaging 1.7pts a game - Forecast total 66pts - They need another 29pts to equal our forecast at 2.1pts a game average which is a 0.4pts improvement on their season. Liverpool - currently averaging 1.6pts a game - Forecast total 61pts - They need another 32 points to equal our forecast at 2.2pts a game average which is a 0.6pts improvement on their season. I think the Europa league and Champs league will see an impact on Liverpool and Arsenal, I expect Spurs to begin to drop points as their fixtures both in europe and league is very very tough plus they have had so many last minute winners to sneak 3pts its unbelievable mainly due to Eriksen and Kane whose form must drop off eventually for a few games. West Ham and Liverpool games massive, if we come out of these games well then I think Europe is definitely on as we take advantage of more rest and recovery than the others.

He's probably knackered and strolling back to his spot

Just reviewed this and our average has dropped form 72 to 71pts based on current stats.

I love reading the RAWK its hilarious, the Redcafe is a bit more sensible though. So happy with the win but goals drying up from Pelle and Tadic along with JWP/Davis super drought is worrying (pun intended).

using football manager hahahaha

[video=youtube_share;k5DWNpFrSAE]

yeah was listening to the same stream, give me the 10th best delivery in the league with 10 goals a season instead though.

is it 10 more points to equal our best ever points haul in the premier league ? do that before April potentially :-)

I know he mistook Vic for Mane

Vic is always a beast but his new haircut helps, plus it gives me an excuse to dig this out again

Loving Sadio and Elia at the moment they are taking the **** with their skill and speed we just need a finish. Fell for Pelle as he is stuck doing hold up play and doesn't have the pace to catch up. We should win based on the first 45mins but as every minute passes in the 2nd half the more frustrated we will become and rangers will grow in confidence, we need an early goal 2nd half to settle us down.

Well at least Koeman knows about Fer's strengths and weaknesses

Yeah it was pretty bad especially when he said if any club needed a manager they'd give him a call for sure once he was "fit" again.

I don't have a problem with the perceived striker shortage as I think Pelle is doing an excellent job in his first season, where I think we have struggled until recently is the goals from the wide men in the 3 and the attacking midfielder role. I think Koeman's complaint to Tadic about shooting more reveals more about how he expects his forwards to contribute in this regard (rather than just assist as you can't be 1 dimensional in this team) and if you look at the current goal tallies: Davis - 21 games and 0 goals Tadic - 20 games 3 goals Mane - 11 games and 4 goals JWP - 10 games and 0 goals Elia - 3 games and 2 goals Total Goals - 9 goals in 65 games (statistically) or once every 7 and a bit games. I don't think that is enough for the quality of players we have, Elia has started hot and Mane is in form based on the last month or so, Davis and JWP need to score something even if its off their arse and Tadic for the quality and positions he gets into should have more than 3 goals. I would say that I really think Elia and Mane can help pump this number up but Davis (certain to score today) and JWP/Tadic need to contribute, I think an average of 5 across those 5 should be the initial target. Just for comparison our DM's: Morgan - 16 games and 3 goals Vic - 14 games and 3 goals Jack - 5 games and 2 goals Total goals - 8 goals in 35 games (statistically) or one in every 4 and a bit games. Defenders: Ryan - 22 games and 2 goals Clyne - 21 games and 2 goals Maya - 9 games and 1 goal Toby - 16 games and 1 goal Jose - 22 games and 0 goals Florian - 5 games and 0 goals Total goals - 6 goals in 95 games (statistically) or one in 15 and a bit games

I wouldn't as every awesome chance seems to be falling to JWP at the moment who's in a somewhat of a goal drought

Sleep is wasted opportunity

Really interesting read that one, I never knew he received a cut of all transfers a policy which I suspect has followed him around everywhere except Spurs as Levy does actually have some money management skills. I'd quite happily allow HR that policy if it swings the other way as well in that he pays 5% on any loss on transfers, bet he wouldn't sign up for that. Also I'd heard he takes a % of a players wage for playing him or for just buying him, I think that would explain that Portsmouth player (name escapes me) who he has signed like about 4 times and never played.