rallyboy

yo Mack, keep the faith bro - even if it is misguided and delusional.

is that really another year of my life lost on here?... All the best to everyone for Christmas - plus health and happiness for 2014.

good point from Torres there, the Conference doesn't mess about, they shoot prisoners, so there would be no room for transgressing. However I do expect them to survive, possibly spinning a last day survival into the greatest great escape since Alan Knight was wandering about with soil in his trousers. Bumping along in League Two would seriously mess up income and that is what they need beyond anything else. Someone has to fund the revival, and every year they fail to go up, the arena gets more rickety, and the enthusiasm for pretending to be fan-owned diminishes. Meanwhile I need to get to St Marys to see if we can wrestle control of 7th/8th in the country, away from a team that spent more than £100M in the summer. While the few need to prepare for the biggest match in their history against Northampton Town. Suddenly it looks like Christmas.

It might seem a bit obvious, but that my little nutjob friends, is the end of any play-off dreams. They will not be going up, and though I doubt that they will be going down, the income projections and the plan of an immediate return to Glorytown are a little bit fuc£ed. The biggest and pluckiest fan-owned dream in world sport didn't fall at the first hurdle, it came over all wheezy on the blocks* - and had to be carried away by rotund St John's staff. As the PDT plan has hit the rocks, just think what Chanrai might have achieved had he been allowed. *Avram and a prossie who suffers from breathing difficulties.

There does still seem to be a little reluctance in accepting the crimes of the past - or the reality of the present. I also suspect that a large section of their fanbase would do it all again for the glory of beating a midtable bankrupt Championship club 1-0, using players who will have to wait about eight years for their wages. Let's not pretend that plummeting from the elite to the basement isn't a punishment of sorts, but yeah you talked me into it, one more relegation should probably do it.

It's a right old slab of history - a proper trip down memory lane, in a good way. Forget the handkerchiefs with your initials on them or cartoon socks, go cultural this year.

like their fanbase, it's all relative.

The portsea myth factory is open for business! Roll up, roll up, get your dock strikes, SS tank commanders, and just in for Christmas, scummahs run on dirty cash from Colombian drug cartels, £100M in debt, the family desperately trying to launder money. :lol: portsmythmatics.

Slade really need to stop before it looks undignified.

Excellent - I'd forgotten the festive calendar game! By my reckoning the two surviving poster boys of the 2013 calendar have so far between them amassed a staggering total of exactly zero appearances for the plucky blues this season. As the club is making progress, my money is on a mere six of the 2014 dozen not surviving the January transfer window cull. It all depends on whether you are a half-full calendar sort of person. Re the quiz - there are so many questions about their recent history that need addressing! But with most of those never likely to be answered... What unique hat trick has the club achieved in the last fifteen years? Or, who is the only portsmouth-born player to score the winner in a post-war fa cup final? (probably)

Money an issue???? No, we are rolling in it! If what I hear socially every couple of weeks comes to pass then pompey will be able to buy Chelsea ten times over! And even if it doesn't, there are several consortiums waiting in the wings to snap up the sleepiest giant in world football - I can't say who but think of China, South Africa and Jupiter. Oh yes, you jealous Nutjobs with your crazy theories wish that there were money issues, but I'm afraid that just isn't true. Even if it went a little wrong we still have the parachute payments to cover everything, and they are ringfenced. Mugs! Sorry I've not been about much since my street cred was destroyed, it's a busy time of year. regards Ho. Ho. Ho.

so it's the nasty league again, allowing the other teams an additional 30mins after the hour to turn the game around. Re the myths and delusion, I honestly believe it is more about ignorance. I have witnessed first hand the lack of knowledge about their recent history. Many of the few think that they have paid off all debts, they don't understand nor care about the business side, they also believe stuff made up about our administration, and they are content to embrace every myth offered to them. While it remains the Isle of the Easily-Led, the fairy tales and delusion will continue. It would be good for all concerned if real questions were asked of the Property Developing Trust, genuine transparency was introduced, and their criminal history was addressed rather than brushed under the carpet as part of a cherry-picking of history. But most only care what happens on a Saturday aftneroon - any crimes committed off the pitch are ignored as irrelevant. If they looked at the whole picture they could move on - and this thread would drift away peacefully in it's sleep.

thanks Mr Bear, and to all the voters what slapped a cross in me box - and you are right, the Lounge is some sort of rundown council estate desperately in need of regeneration, I is definitely looking for some transfer action in the January window. I've been held in the PTS thread remand centre for years now. Me and the Trousers share a cell, and as you know he is a bloke what can fill a bucket before midnight, meaning any time spent in solitary is a breath of fresh air. So Bearsy, as Mr Big on the East Wing, do you reckon you could put in a word for me re a transfer? I'd like to get in on the main board scene and though I'm not sure that I'm fickle enough, or mentally ill, I am prepared to try. I'll throw my season ticket at the dugout if the parking price goes up, or I'll stand looking really serious in front of the ground, waving a hankie to display my displeasure. But as someone who is on the register, I am prepared to make the following offer... If you makes the official presentation at the next home game, I'll pay Mr G a fiver to buy my way off the offender programme, as long as the Bear helps me adjust back into mainstream society and offers me spritiual guidance...and first go on his sister.

The first rule of Transparency Club.

I thought the season ticket total was around 10,000 at about £200 a go. That low price certainly got the numbers in but we always said that it would damage the income for the rest of the season. The plan was to get that hardcore in for cashflow, and then to get a promotion campaign on the go to fill the ground and bring in matchday income. So yes, on paper 15,000 for League Two looks pretty good, compared with people like Newport and Accrington - but the masterplan has gone off the rails. For the self-proclaimed biggest fan-owned club in history, who claimed in their marketing material the best atmosphere in world football, there was an intention to have gates of 18,000+ cheering them back to the Prem. Perhaps a more modest club might accept some stabilising years in the basement, but when you gob off like that and then fail to deliver.... And if you think that is just unrealistic Nutjobbery, check out our own stats from League One and imagine the attendances if we had done season tickets at £200 - we took 50,000+ to Wembley paying full price. Coventry recently took 7,000 to an away game, Leeds took 6,500, people like West Ham can muster 6,000. pompey's fanbase can be measured by their away trips that are charged at full price. They may consider themselves a big fish in League Two, but their second season in the basement will tell us how the projections are working, and how fresh that feelgood factor really is. rallyboy you jealous nutjob, 15,000 is fantastic... Yes it would be - if they were all paying!

That must have been a good day out! Did you visit the permanent exhibition Toilets from the Middle Ages or attend the living art installation Unpacked Park? If I'd known you were going you could have picked me up a souvenir jar of tap fat, or some horse brass and heather from the club shop.

shellshocked is indeed the term. He had a wake up call today and it sounded like he didn't enjoy it. No Cotterillesque delusion, Barker just came across as a man lost, stunned by the lack of fight in his squad. Whittingham must have wet himself when he saw their result. Perhaps the booing today was still for Guy rather than aimed at the heroic players who will hopefully take the club to a new level... That said, it was the most passionate and loyal booing in the country. I also felt a bit sorry for their overpaid keeper - his comment that there are no leaders was quite telling. I'd expect Barker to bring in some old warhorse to try and get some steel in the team as they are clearly pushovers at the moment. God help them if they draw our youth team in any competition soon.

It was indeed an honour to meet the godfather of the thread, and to ask him how I can claim back the two years of my life that must have been lost within these pages. As for Lord T, you alone obviously understand why I entered West Quay dressed as Kendo Nagasaki, it's the only way to preserve my true identity. My next undercover public appearance will be as Father Christmas in Cosham High Street - so if any of the caravanning few want to have a word, bring it on, I'll see you in the grotto you sister-bothering dentist-dodgers! I'll be the one in red and white, and just like Avram I'll be giving it the big ho-ho-ho.

I'm a little bit confused. Who am I supposed to be now? I thought I only existed on this forum but I seem to have spilled out into the real world. Please put me back in the thread, I was happy there, it's my safe place.

that's not exactly what Mrs RB just said. She looked over my shoulder, saw the forum and said oh I see you're still working on really important stuff.

Enough time has passed for the true story to be writ large in the book of myths. Plucky young blues edged out in seven goal thriller! A Saints youth squad crammed with first team experience was given a football lesson this week in front of a silent home crowd, and were fortunate not to be facing a daunting replay and certain defeat in the packed cauldron of passion that is fortress fatpipes. Despite a numerical advantage due to visiting players caught in the travel chaos caused by the size of the blue following, the pompey academy team shocked their south coast rivals and were only denied a deserved victory by poor refereeing and misfortune. While pompey's squad was selected from pure-blooded Portsea boys, the home side's teamsheet was littered with dirty foreigners and at least four of their goals had a hint of offside about them, while another two should have been ruled as freekicks to the away side. In theory that means that one goal separated the two sides after an end-to-end battle that left the stunned and meagre home support reeling, but the battle was crucially decided by a moment of hesitation from an official. With nine-man pompey dominating the game after twenty minutes and pushing for a breathrough, a desperate Saints clearance released the pressure and bounced awkwardly in the pompey half before somehow finding it's way into the net. Despite protests, the 'goal' was allowed to stand. Rather than buckle under the weight of this blatant injustice, the setback just served to compound the resilience shown by Awford's young community-owned charges, and the rest of the game was one way traffic. Though the result could be viewed by some as a minor setback, the pitiful home crowd that had been outsung for ninety minutes by the massed blue army that filled three sides of the council-owned stadium applauded the efforts of the pompey academy, before booing their own side. The boos turned to violence as a group of strike-breaking Southampton dockers broke away from their picket-crossing antics to attack a frail disabled old lady in the away section. Fortunately the groups' assault was driven back by two plucky children, armed only with their pride. But on the pitch it had been an astonishing night for the young blues who may well have been robbed of actual victory in a football sense, but were clearly the real winners on a night when the result didn't matter.

dear few What the f$ck? I've just seen the accounts, and I thought Crawley was a mess. When's my signing on fee hitting the account? No seriously, where is it? A banking error, oh right. And now I discover that Coppell is going to be on more than I am within a few months, what a joke. Where's the training ground? What? Bloody hell. How many are we expecting on Saturday? No, not the away support, the attendance? Oh. Connolly shut it, I know you wanted the job, yes you will get a game - and why are you limping? No I don't want to fill in a template, what do you mean you've already sent it out? Why would I say that? What a frigging joke. Anyway, let me see the first team training when these reserves have finished. What? Sh1t. And what is that running out of the taps? regards Richie

an important little gem from Solent... Coppell will be involved in watching games, scouting, assisting the manager, advising the board, laying the foundation for a five year plan etc etc. His role will be unpaid....INITIALLY. Yes, he's not costing a penny, dining on roadkill squirrel and riding a bike to games - but only initially! After the spin has died down about him working for free, he's going to be granted elbow room at the trough.

That Bradley incident has been the saddest advert for their club since they moved on from money-laundering, theft and prostitution, to match-fixing. Two fellow professionals (sort of) run into each other, the lesser-known one asks for a photo and is chuffed enough to Tweet it. Is that a crime? Apparently so - he is vilified and abused by cross-eyed, toothless, sister-bothering heather-flogging simpletons, who on Saturday will sing the name of a man who scored goals for us, and who unlike all of his colleagues, has never put his name to their media template no.3 - the one that praises the bestest fans in world sport. So having your picture taken with an England international makes you a disloyal **** who doesn't understand the rivalry, but cheering on the bloke who scored goals in red and white is okay. They are dim.

you made me chuckle there Bob. Yes those floorboards are indeed the original poop deck from HMS Victory, and the tablecloth is the main sail that was later used at Trafalgar to wrap Nelson's body - commonly known as the shroud of Tipner. Both are valued by Storrie Antiques at £700M. The glasses are the original ones used by Churchill and the Beverley Sisters to toast Victory in Europe, while the fat tramp in the open-necked shirt is just a competition winner. He came up with the best PR plan to explain away the coincidental Crawley departure of Mr Barker, and won himself a no-expenses ever paid night out with three very serious men sat around a table that is too small for purpose, surrounded by adverts encouraging people to bet on football matches. Mr Barker went on to praise the passion and loyalty of the fans, something he observed first hand as he waited in the wings watching his predecessor being hounded out. But it was the bestest booing there has ever been.