Lighthouse

His wages will be sizeable and he’ll only come here if we can give him a decent contract. If he comes here, doesn’t do much and we go down, he could become something of a financial burden which we may struggle to offload.

I don't think anyone is writing him off as such but after some of the players we've signed, particularly up front, you can forgive people for being sceptical of a player who has two league goals this season.

Not exactly guff, he was unfit for two of the three seasons he played here. Granted he had the season of his life in the middle but I wouldn’t bet on that being the one he replicates again my time soon.

I’m not entirely sure you know what a hipster is.

I would have to agree with that. We’re going to need someone better than ‘not wanted at Villa’ to get us out of this mess, particularly with his fitness record.

Chelsea on New Year’s Day?

This thread reminds me of one of my favourite Karl Pilkington quotes; "I can't buy my girlfriend flowers, she gets suspicious and wants to know why I've bought them. If she came home and I'd built that (the Taj Mahal) she'd be like, "right, what is going on!?""

I'll go and grab one of those "Dial X for horny grandmas" stickers from the nearest phone box and post that. Incidentally, whilst we're doing typographical errors, it turns out 'ligh' is an old Celtic word meaning to lick.

Actually he probably wishes Lavia hadn’t been injured for the majority of the season, meaning he had to do much more defensive work covering for the inadequacies of AMN and Diallo. All but 8 minutes of JWP’s England career have come under ‘the cult of Ralph’ so I doubt he holds that much resentment towards him.

Nice to see him finding a new career, after Steps.

Just need to win at Arsenal now and the hoodoo is broken.

F5 F5 F5 F5

I like it.

Its just a shame about that ancient scripture in Jerusalem, which says that Southampton shalt not win at Goodison.

3-0, Pahars. No way Leeds are coming back from this.

He was no Eljero Elia.

TBF I’d drive quicker if people were firing mortars at me too.

It looks like a few fans might be planning a protest, there’re just a few details that need ironing out first.

3.5 games out of 21 missed, I make that around £1.8m down the toilet. Small change for Chelsea but still funny whilst they’re floundering in mid-table.

How far back are we going? Mary Queen of Scots was pure filth, I’ve heard. VAR check on that, Turkish brought up Maj first and followed it up with Nigella. Not disapproving, just saying.

I’d still give her two big ones and four from the bottom.

Shania Twain and, up until recently, Angela Lansbury.

Have you seen her these days? Ageing like a fine Tupperware lid.

Last time we won this one, Barbie Girl was top of the charts after two solid months of Candle in the Wind. So, no time like the present Saints…

It was never going to be Forest, was it.