Lighthouse

Christ, that’s the worst marking I’ve ever seen.

Orsic, thank god we coughed up the extra dough to get him in the door.

Not to send DCC off?

Absolute w**ker, what was he thinking?!

Think Adams at Molyneux but in our own six yard box.

Having thundered the offside chance into the bottom corner, Mara…

Watching those celebrations, there is a small part of me who wants Grimsby to go through. At the risk of being condescending, it would mean a lot for them to go through and get a trip to a properly big team. We’ll just limply dribble out of the competition against anyone we play in the next round.

How did it take so long to check something so obvious.

Orsic and Orsi being on the pitch is mildly irritating.

We’re doing fine, there’s nothing to get upset about yet.

He will do neither. Most likely it’ll be a West Ham, Leicester, Villa or Everton level club with possibly a moderate pay rise.

The Spy who asked for my Explicit Consent.

They’ll be delighted to see us go down, three wins here in eleven league visits since our promotion.

WTF?! He plays for Spurs and why are you obsessing over clean sheets, as opposed to actual goals conceded? Your metric could be used to prove that a 0-9 and a 0-0 were better than the 2-1 against Chelsea and 1-1 against Arsenal. Forster is not an improvement, just another name in the sorry list of substandard ‘keepers we’ve had since promotion.

So Forster conceded 1.8 goals per game, Baz concedes 1.7.

Last year Forster played in the 3-0 loss at Brentford, the 0-6 against Chelsea, 1-4 against Man City, 0-2 against Burnley and 1-2 at home to Watford. We weren’t better with him in the team.

If Forster had been in goal, he would still be diving for Firpo’s shot right now. He’s actually a pretty good metaphor for Saints in that he will go down eventually, it just takes seven years.

It’s really tricky trying to park anywhere near the Saudi embassy on a Monday morning.

Because no manager who’s worth anything would agree to Jack in a decent, stable wage in the Championship for a high risk, one year deal.

The lunatics on Gumtree, I’ve literally had the exact same exchange with five people this week: "Hello, is this still available?" "Hi, yes it’s available." Never hear from them again. I’m sorry, I didn’t realise that was a pub quiz question, I thought you wanted to buy it.

I'm no goalkeeping coach, so I could be completely wrong on this, but I'd say if he was stood centrally near that purple line, it'd just have been a Kelvin-esq tap in, low at the near post. The fact is that I'd expect 95% of Premier League players to score from 8 yards out (the 5% being our players) and I would consider it extremely poor finishing not to find a space around the 'keeper from such close range. I think Adams and AA's inability to do it has lowered our collective expectation of finishing prowess.

I wish some ‘c**t’ could get us up to 18th, a point from safety and averaging one point per game.

Apart from the fact that the LB has scored more goals than five of the front six, combined?

People said that about West Ham in 2011, they came third. Those two have far more high earners, with bigger egos, who won’t fancy a pay cut in the Championship. The best placed teams are usually the likes of Norwich, Fulham and (until recently) West Brom, who are geared for being around promotion and relegation battles.

If we could maybe start fighting that'd be nice. We are going down and Bournemouth will most likely join us. I'd like Everton to come down too and I don't think they'd be as nailed on for promotion as you might think. They'll need a huge clear out and have zero experience in that league, unlike most of the other candidates. If I was a betting man though; Forest.