Lighthouse

We’ve lost 13 league games this season. Puel lost 16. If we can nick a draw at Brentford or Leicester, we will have lost fewer games than Puel… without the help of Fonte and Van Dijk for half a season.

AA would be a decent buy for anyone chasing promotion next season. We might have to subsidise a portion of his wages but at least we can recoup something.

I can’t see either Broja or AA being here next season and that doesn’t upset me either.

I received that too. It did smell nice.

No, my point was that the obvious solution of playing Perraud hasn’t improved us at all. Some people may well prefer it, I’m not saying they’re wrong, but it’s a long way from being the solution to our problems. When your attacking players are any four out of a truly hopeless bunch, playing a left footed left back isn’t going to make all that much difference.

How’ve you figured that out? We kept them because it was cheap, we sold Gabbi because he didn’t fit in with our system but was good enough to get reasonable money from Italy.

So your main gripe with him is that he didn’t bring on a player who has two goals this season and last scored 6 months ago?

Right, so you have no idea you just want somebody to come in and do better with Long, Moi, Bednarek, Redmond and co.?

People said that when he refused to drop Tino and play Perraud. Now he’s been forced into that, it still hasn’t helped. Honestly, this is 90% on the players. They’re substandard, mentally weak and make regular individual errors.

Who do you think is going to get a tune out of this bunch of no hopers? Half of our team wouldn’t get a game for anyone else in this league, bar maybe Norwich and Watford.

Ah, whatever.

Yes Burnley!

He’s in Josh Sims territory IMO. Really needs to start delivering next season.

Only 1 of our last 12 goals in all comps has been scored by a striker (Broja against West Ham).

Back up? He’s a League 1 standard player (and is only going to get worse) who we sometimes chuck on the pitch when we’re completely fresh out of ideas. He has no business in the Premier League, we need to get rid of his, Walcott and Armstrong’s combined wages and find someone who does.

The past wasn’t much to write home about.

That front four... gah. At least we've got the best faller over in the League (TM) leading the line.

For £4.5bn I’d buy Saints and Pompey, turn the former into title winners and make the latter play jumpers for goalposts at the local rec. I’d sell Fratton to build a nuclear waste reprocessing facility and use the proceeds to buy some Scalextric.

When you're typing something but thinking about something else and accidentally type what you were horse porn.

I reckon would should treat injuries like they do in the grand national. Bring out the green tarpaulin.

I never want to hear the phrase ‘only fans’ in a thread about Charlie Austin again for the rest of my life.

Oh yeah. Do we have to?

We basically had to replace Bertrand and Ings using only the money we received for them, i.e. £30m total. Two players for £15m each and a loan from Chelsea is about as good as we can expect. Sadly AA is just another Earnshaw, Rasiak, Mitrovic or Vydra. Too good for the Championship, not good enough for the Prem.

Aside from another badly disguised dig at Ralph, nobody is going to up sticks and move jobs to work with the mighty Brendan Rodgers. Clubs change managers like socks anyway, he might not be there is six months. Money I've already said as a given, IF they think he's worth that and are willing to fork out the transfer fee to match. 'More potential' is vague and meaningless. More potential to do what? Fight for 7th place with Villa, West Ham, Wolves or any other club who has an above average season.

They can most likely offer a player better wages but nothing else particularly significant. Players don’t care about season ticket waiting lists and potential catchment areas.