Lighthouse

If you were proper naughty you went to b-anter.

I miss those phone calls between Schteve McLaren and BFS. Them were the days.

Giving someone a red nose. Allegedly.

After years of wanting Vettel and Red Bull to lose after their domination of both championships, I'd actually like to see both of them competitive this season. The general consensus seems to be a top 4 of Merc, Williams, Ferrari and Red Bull, depending on the circuit and conditions. Lotus are looking better, McLaren will need a few races to get on the pace.

I found my first grey pubic hair the other day. It was in a Ginster's pastie.

Top 5 Austins Powers Texas Stone Cold Steve Healey (The car manufacturer) Healey (The rugby player)

Brass band Contraband Arse bandits Ed Miliband S Club 7

He said top 5, guys. If you aren't going to play properly then don't play at all.

1. Jaffa 2. Victoria sponge 3. Chocolate log 4. Carrot 5. Battenberg

1. White chocolate mice 2. Strawberry chocolate Percy Pigs 3. Jazzies 4. Cola bottles 5. Skittles.

1. Custard Cream. 2. Orange Club 3. Dark Choc Digestive 4. McVities Gold 5. Bourbons

I'd like to see a younger and possibly female presenter. Not for the sake of equality, just variety. The whole premise of three middle aged men acting like teenagers puts a lot of people watching Top Gear.

Looks like he pushed the boundaries just a little bit too often. Will be interesting to see if he gets replaced on Top Gear and by who.

Which he wont need if he lives in Madrid.

Agreed, most refs wouldn't have had the balls to send off ADM and would probably have given Januzaj then pen, even though it was blatantly the wrong decision.

I'd quite like to know what I should do in situations of injustice. Do you have any more pictures?

Still don't understand how Man Utd are in the top 4 playing so badly. They were every bit as poor as Newcastle in midweek, now followed by hilarious defending for that Arsenal goal.

Is there a video on the internet Bearsy can't masturbate to? I walked in on him cracking one off over footage of the Hindenburg disaster once.

The only time I've seen fans singing about tits, it was aimed at a Sheffield Wednesday faux celebrity, Tango Man After a brief strip tease at the front of the away end he was then involved in a dance off with an even larger topless Saints fan in the Itchen. All this to the tune of "he's got bigger tits than you!" from the home fans.

I'm probably in the minority but I preferred Barnard in League 1. Having said that DC scored some decent goals, not least on his debut at Oldham where he fooled everyone in the ground into thinking he was going one way, then slotted the ball into the opposite corner.

Why does his skin change colour when he is wearing the red or white ones?

My personal favourite was the game Jermaine played at LB and we lost 3-0 at home to Watford. George just sat there like a lemon and didn't make a sub until the 88th minute. Utterly hopeless.

I'd blame pretty much all of that on Whiskey George personally. His preparation in 2007 was just dreadful, starting the season with about 3 defenders on the books and playing BWP instead of Saga most of the time. Saga never lacked effort and went on another small scoring streak under Mark Wotte later on. Skacel and Rasiak were always that good, until George decided to play Skacel at LB and Rasiak on the bench.

I knew the Geordies liked punching the odd horse but I didn't realise they were that bad.

According to the Express this incident occurred less than three miles from where Diana was killed. Coincidence???