Torres

Yes. She's chubby, so going by your reaction to Porky Penny you probably would.

Could be very good timing for the "Presidents" and the PDT, this. Might help distract the few from the rather grave danger they are in...

Not necessarily, Minty. That could have been one of the many games last season where Pompey were the better side by miles, only to be robbed of victory by another terrible performance by a referee for whom the occasion was just too big.

Stop this, now.

Jiggly, more like.

I wonder how much more "flexibility" they can find in their budgets to bring more players in? I still don't think they'll go down but this current bunch of players that nobody else wanted are going to give it a pretty good try.

I didn't think they were allowed anywhere near scouts since Graeme Rix was in charge.

Nonsense - we won the toss at the MCG in 2010, put them in, skittled them for 98 and win by and innings & 150.

So the 11 "Presidents" have pumped £500k of their own cash into the club to pay for improvements to Fatpipes Park. Wonder if they have invaded their equity stakes accordingly?

Trader - it's not the fielding teams decision as to when lunch/tea/stumps is called!

And J-Rod will not go.

Those exact words appeared in another article published on Dec 21st on the Mirror's website. They're not even trying any more, are they?

The Football League have them in a choke hold right now...

Without getting too carried away on their potential Conference future (I'm afraid I think they'll survive relatively comfortably this season) it is worth remembering that the Conference are very, very strict with their financial management rules and are not afraid to dish out big punishments to clubs that don't comply...

If he wasn't totally knackered we wouldn't be 3-0 down and if he knows he's knackered and knows he can't contribute and help us save some face in this series he's done absolutely the right thing.

"@DarylPuttock: Depressing knowing I've got lower league away days for the next 5 years at least #pompey #smeggygrounds" Delivered without a hint of irony

If they stay up this year then they will stabilise in League Two and the chance of them dropping out of the Football League will be lost. Once they (finally) pay off the football creditors they will be able to spend money and will eventually get themselves back to the upper reaches of L1 or into the Championship. However, if they drop down to the conference it'll take them even longer to pay back whichever debts they are actually going to bother repaying given that their income will drop massively AGAIN (home supporters and away supporters down, tickets even cheaper, no TV money at all, no interest for sponsors with no coverage outside the town itself). On top of that, with only 2 up out of the conference compared with 4 up from L2 you could argue that it's much, much harder to get out of that league. If they go down now they could be there for years and will well and truly disappear from the consciousness of most football fans.

You guys are all desperately underestimating the noise that 10,000 empty seats make nowadays.

Speaking of the PDT, the Tesco development seems to have gone quiet. I presume it's still all systems go, despite the protests of the local butcher, baker and candlestick maker?

The figures include all ST holders regardless of whether they actually turn up or not. With 12000 or so ST holders plus 800 Newport fans there won't have been many Skates who actually bought match tickets for yesterday.

There is a rule, you know. The most basic of all rules.....

Something could definitely be made of Cinderella, too.

Portsmouth FC sold to a man who doesn't exist in return for some magic beans?

Storrie-Teller: Based on all my years of football experience, our squad is worth £100m! Audience: Oh no it isn't! S-T: Oh yes it is! repeat to fade