CB Fry

If our Jeff was born in an African township he'd have still bought his first house in southern England by the age of 30. Just hard work innit.

If they come up I think we should follow their season in a dedicated thread, but entirely positively - celebrating when they win, commiserating when they don't. Basically the opposite of the P*mpey thread. Let's all enjoy and support our second team's great adventure. Come on the Cherries! Nothing would wind them up more.

Oh please do us another pompous speech about how you don't believe hearsay and speculation in the newspapers. You're so clever to be above all that. And then massively backtrack when it dawns on you that the Clarkson incident is not hearsay at all and is what normal human being call "something that actually happened and everyone involved accepts happened". I accept your apology.

Ha! I had you down for about 50. Well done then, you earned it all fair and square, anyone else that can't do it is clearly not working as hard as you then.

Are you in your late teens/early twenties? If no, I'm not sure how relevant your up - by - my - bootstraps story is. In your day, did council house lads have to pull together £30k just for a deposit on their first house? I mean the average first time buyer these days is about 30, but 20 years ago it was closer to 20. The only possible explanation is people worked much, much harder 20 years ago. Lazy beggars ain't they these days?

LOL. Just parroting an opinion the right wing press told him to have.

You started by describing the entire event as "hearsay" conducted by the media that clever old you learned many years ago to ignore. Now, was what Lord Hall said on the matter based on "hearsay" in the media? Yes or no? Or was what Lord Hall said on the matter based on an investigation involving all parties including witnesses? Are you finally coming round to accept this incident did actually happen now? Or is it still "hearsay" and "newspaper reports and media speculation" that other less clever people "blindly believe"? Lastly, for someone supposedly above rumours in the media that clever old you many years ago learned to ignore, you seem to be desperate to hear first hand reports from the two people involved to satisfy yourself it happened. Well, high profile personalities aside, this is an internal disciplinary procedure that quite frankly is none of your fu cking business to hear chapter and verse exactly what happened. However, If you're still after salacious gossip you just might find that in your favourite tabloid.

I think you wrongly used the phrase "no one knows what actually happened". This is just untrue.

Except, of course, you are speculating. The idea that "no one knows what happened" is total speculation and, indeed, total nonsense. As is the idea all we have to refer to is "media reports" - worse than speculation, this is just a lie on your part. The BBC have conducted a full investigation, speaking to everyone involved and reached conclusions and shared them, via the Director General. You think Lord Hall based all that on "media reports" and "hearsay"? As it stands Jeremy Clarkson has not contested this or sued anyone for libel. So you might think you are being all jolly clever by disregarding everything as hearsay but clearly it isn't and saying otherwise is pointless speculation on your part.

So you've strung together some utterly meaningless and facile platitudes/maxims. Have a peanut. What's your point?

I think you're speculating more than anyone else, living in some world where the Clarkson affair is some intricate web that requires a jury to decide what happened, rather than a grumpy TV presenter going off on one and lamping someone, and then reporting it, himself, to his bosses. How long do you think this fantasy island court case with a jury and everything would take to finally, finally unpick the mysterious truth of this enigmatic kaleidoscope of a crime? The OJ Simpson trial took ten months to work through - do you think a jury could make a decision in that time on this one, or is it just one of those cases we may never, ever solve?

They did indeed. I fact pretty much no one has denied what happened, especially Clarkson himself. Whitey is spectacularly wrong about most things, though, so let him live on his "it's all hearsay" fantasy island.

Aaaand he's pulled out of HIGNFY.

If that Atletico president was a bit more forward thinking back then he would have purchased plain red shirts instead. Maybe stopped off at Bristol or Swindon. Atletico would be huge with them Orientals now if he had done.

Agree with that. But if the Tory coalition/majority is as slim as I think it will be I think we'd end up with another poll within a year or so. With likely a new Conservative leader.

Well the fundamental point of that post was that Wanyama would be unlikely to leave in the summer, and reasons why I think that is the case. What's your problem?

With a slim or no majority and backbenches crammed with malcontents I doubt he'd survive five years, especially with Boris in the house.

Okaaaaaay.

I look forward to chatting to Miso Wagamama when he signs up.

Slightly disturbing tweet from the Grauniad's bright young columnist. https://twitter.com/OwenJones84/status/586092985743466496 "Michael Fallon’s “stabbed in the back” metaphor is deeply sinister. It is a classic anti-Semitic trope." Blimey.

Oh, our aching sides.

Wanyama is still in that funny no man's land where his potential valuation is not significantly higher than what we paid for him - ie no top four club is going to wade in with a £18-20 mil bid for him, and we won't sell him for, say £13 mil as it isn't enough of a profit for us. So he would have to demand a transfer which he probably won't do. Or run his contract down another year.

This. Both of them have been fundamental to our success this season (and MS for longer of course) but in that slightly boring, unspectacular way. They go unnoticed, especially TA who is efficient in an strangely anonymous way. Highly likely our supreme defensive record will leave when those two go. But the blame for that will fall on those left behind rather than those who have gone.

Surprise is our greatest weapon. I'm thinking the front four wear Mexican wrestling masks to add to the mystery.

Indeed. The UKIP bloke came across like someone who had just wandered in from the pub and just rambled. Pretty representative of the ranting shambles that is "the peoples army". Lord spare us.