Saint Keef

I've just checked, and I haven't wet the bed. I wasn't sure about Russell Martin when we appointed him, but I am now. Get rid ASAP before its too late to mount a proper challenge. No point waiting until Christmas when it will be too late for anyone to make a significant impact. I assume there is money available from the transfers. Use it now to pay off this clown and get someone in who at least has a clue what they're doing. This has got Pellegrino and Jones written all over it. The players are not good enough for the tippy tappy bollocks being coached and are obviously not buying into it. The only time we looked like attacking tonight was when Bazumu punted it long.

Dear Saints. I would sincerely like to thank you or fucking up yet another of my weekends. And a special message to Russell Martin. If your analysis of this bollocks is similar to the analysis after the Sunderland game, don't fucking bother!

It would be an insult to schoolboys to say we're making schoolboy errors. How many managerial fuck ups can this lot make? I'm afraid to say I'm all for Martin leaving now. From what I have seen, this is the worst we have been in a very, very long time. He is absolutely tactically clueless.

I genuinely had a dream last night. This real. We were 2-0 up after about 10 minutes. Thinking about it now, in my dream, we were playing in red and white stripes. Bollocks!

Utter fucking shambles. There is a reason Holgate couldn't get into the basket case Everton line-up. I have never criticized Bazumu on here before and personally felt his treatment on here was a bit harsh, but I'm afraid today I have to agree and say he is not up to it. Rabbit in the headlights stuff today. Unfortunately McCarthy is worse I believe. Haven't read all through these pages, but can we still get Schmeichel as he is a free agent. It must be a consideration.

I see the guy who invented the predictive text died last week. His funeral is next monkey. BOOM BOOM

Yes indeed. Very profound CanadaSaint. Merely an observation as I see it: just as the so called "big clubs" (not just the Premier League but possibly across Europe as well) unsettle players at mid-size and smaller clubs by tempting them with bigger wages and "The Promised Land" of Premier League football, it does appear that these big clubs are starting to get a taste of their own medicine, by their biggest assets being tempted to go to the Saudi league for even more money, which will surely ultimately end in poorer quality within the top English and European leagues, but then I guess this will then filter down through the lower leagues as those big clubs snap up whoever is left. Not saying it will happen over night, but in this particular transfer window, there definitely appears to have been a trend starting. How long before the likes of Sky ditch the premier league and swap it for the Saudi leagues? Of course, if Salah does go.......they can have Che for $60m if they are desperate.....as long as they give us time to replace him 🤣

Not sure if there is anything in this, but BBC reporting as follows....if it happens you may well hear me laughing my socks off.... Al-Ittihad are preparing a £118m bid for Mohamed Salah, despite Liverpool insisting their 31-year-old Egypt forward is not for sale. (Mail) Liverpool boss Jurgen Klopp would be "furious" if the Reds are tempted to accept Saudi side Al-Ittihad's offer for Salah with the transfer deadline on Friday. (Star)

All together now, in a Geordie accent.....EIEIEIO Time for Eddie Howe to go.......

Mike Dean is/was an egotistical wankstain within the game. Why on earth Sky are now employing this twat beggars fucking belief. By all means have an ex-referee to analyse decisions, but Mike Dean? Really?

I did suggest the idea a couple of weeks ago that we sell Lavia to Chelsea and then take him back on loan for a year. If he is not in Poch's immediate first team plans, rather the warm the bench for months, surely they would want him playing competitive football. They are not going to loan him to another prem club, so it would make perfect sense to send him back here of 6 months, maybe with an option to extend to 12 months. Wishful thinking maybe (definitely!) but stranger things have happened! A Win Win for us for sure. The player and Chelsea would also benefit and our relationship with Chelsea seems to be pretty positive at present.

He'll go to somewhere, where they speak a strange language, a team who are desperate for a striker, a club that doesn't have a pot to piss in and hence can pick him up as a free agent...........so Everton it is then.

Maybe instead of Che, we can offer Mara to "The Desperate Dugouts" for £20m.

Calvert Lewin - gone off with a possible broken cheekbone. Iwobi is off - done a hamstring. Everton will be desperate now. For £40m they can have Che!!! In seriousness, career wise, would Che benefit from another season struggling against relegation with Everton, who look absolutely appalling, in a league where he has struggled to make his mark, or a season banging in goals in the Championship. If he is thinking about his Scotland career, then I think the latter is the better option.

Not sure how this would work, but with the money we've brought in so far, can we not offset some of that money with new and improved contracts for Tella and Che (and Alcaraz if necessary). If they would be happy to stay with the new "terms" surely it would be more cost effective than bringing in replacements who may, or may not be any good.

The match officials for the Wolves non-penalty debacle dropped from next weekend's games. Big deal! Presumably these muppets get paid handsomely for making these blatant fuck-ups. https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/66506026

I'm really not missing VAR where we are now. Regarding the "non-penalty" for Wolves - poor decision by the ref not to give it, but absolutely shameful decision by VAR. And then a yellow card for the Wolves manager for protesting. We would have been fuming if that had gone against us and Wolves have every right to feel hard done by. The Premier League is so biased towards the big clubs it has made the whole league a joke and VAR has got a lot to answer for in that respect. I know Saturday's game against Norwich had it's highs and lows for Saints, but overall, from what I've seen so far in the Championship, the games are more free flowing and thereby more entertaining without stopping for VAR at every marginal decision.

BBC Sport saying Caicedo to Liverpool for £111m is nearly complete. However Sky have just reported that Chelsea have offered £115m and could be completed by tomorrow. What the actual fuck? It's not often I shout for Chelsea haha.

How about.....Chelsea get Lavia for £50+m and then.....wait for it.....have so many midfield players, they loan him back to us for a season. Obviously my medication has just kicked in, but would that be a "Scouse Headfuck" or what?

Bearing in mind Chelsea's first game is against Liverpool this weekend, if they do pick up Caicedo and Lavia, even if neither plays in that game, the whole psychological ramifications of "we're richer than you" will surely damage the Liverpool mindset for this weekend. I don't like Chelsea, but would rather see Lavia develop under Poch than under Klippity and will make Liverpool's approaches for him even more laughable.

Completely off topic of course, but linked to the Spike Milligan comments and and (I think) a funny story for you Spike fans.....with a tenuous link to football. I was privileged to meet Spike a few times and would occasionally see him in the Bayswater (London) area, where he had his office. I still have a personal letter I received from him which I treasure. Anyway - the story.....It was 1997 (I just checked) and my Dad's Birthday was approaching. I saw that Spike was signing a new book about The Goons at John Menzies in the City of London. My Dad was a massive Goons fan. I was working in London at the time, and thought it would make a great present, so on the day, I parked my car in the City (those were the days) and went off to John Menzies. There was already a massive queue around the shop and I joined the end of it. The queue moved at a snail's pace partly because Spike didn't just sign people's books, but had a chat, or a laugh and joke with absolutely everyone he was signing the book for. I queued for about 2 hours in total. It felt like it was taking forever. As I queued, I noticed all around the shop were signs and posters displayed, which read 'NEXT WEEK! JIMMY GREAVES WILL BE SIGNING COPIES OF HIS NEW BOOK'. Eventually it was my turn to step forward and have my book signed. I stepped forward but suddenly stopped in front of him. "Oh bloody hell" I said. "What's wrong?" asked Spike. I said "I've queued here for two solid hours to get my book signed and I thought you were Jimmy Greaves!" He laughed. I laughed. Everyone around laughed. He took the next book off the pile and said "I am Jimmy Greaves. Do you want me to sign it Jimmy Greaves?" (More laughter) I said "No, it's for my Dad, he won't get the joke, you'd better sign it Spike Milligan". More laughter. I left the shop, returned to my car and of course......I'd got a parking ticket for overstaying my welcome. My Dad passed away 10 years ago, but when he died I took possession of the book and still have it......published 1997.....and thankfully signed "Spike Milligan" and not Jimmy Greaves. Yes I've read all his "war" books. Incredibly funny and sad in equal measure. He was certainly a hero of mine. The man was, with the greatest respect, completely bonkers in terms of his comedy, but then he was, in my opinion, a genius. As I say, completely off topic, but thanks for letting me share this memory. I have other stories about him, but another time maybe.

Just a random thought. Maybe the Flynn Downes part of the deal is a bit of a non-starter and either they or us have pulled the plug on it. Or Wet Spam playing silly buggers, "You fuck around with us and we'll fuck around with you" in a good old East End tradition. In my opinion, if they haven't bought him by tomorrow night we should play him against Norwich.

Everyone knows they are sitting on the £105m from the Rice sale. I seem to recall when we sold VvD for what was a great fee at that time, the prices of all our targets suddenly increased.

Let's face it, Jones royally fucked us all! I still get a nasty twitch when I see his name.

You're right - he did.