miserableoldgit

A guy goes to the doctor and says "I think I might have a hearing problem." Doc says "Can you describe the symptoms?". The guy says "Yeah. Its basically a cartoon about this family called Homer, Bart, Lisa ......"

You forgot the "already" at the end of your post.

According to Radio Solent this morning, neither Hart or the Storrie-Teller were consulted about Grants appointment. They were just informed that it was happening. Make of that what you will.

Wasn`t that what SAF has been saying though???:confused:

Irony Alert!!!

According to todays Daily Mail, Coventry have lost interest in signing Sam Vokes on loan. I wonder why?

Bloody Daily Mail reading meerkatists get everywhere.

Basingstoke??

Didn`t we have one v Derby in the Play-Offs??

http://www.multimap.com/maps/?qs=****ing&countryCode=AT The newspaper article below is even funnier than the sign!

As Mrs Merton said to Debbie McGee " What attracted you to the.........?" You can fill the rest in!!!

Patchouli Oil

No wonder we didn`t win! The team were obviously wondering who Ian Pardew is!

:)

We have a memory foam mattress (not a topper) and we love it. Very comfortable and relaxing.

People generally have a choice whether to be fat or not, but short, tall or to an extent, bald people have as much control over their physical charcteristics as they have as to where they were born.

Didn`t someone say that he runs a bookshop? Probably a "specialist" one and he has his own "right-hand" to have no need for female company.

I did see yesterday that Graham Norton was rapped on the knuckles by the BBC for making a homophobic remark about lesbians!!

I wondered why you were called Dog!

It is really, because you can face Police action for alledged racist/homophobic remarks/jokes, so does this mean that by natural progression that they will be investigating other offensive comments (fattiphobic, shortist etc)?Again, I have no agenda here, just curiosity.

I agree with this but I wasn`t thinking about arguments in particular. Just about the common usage of language and humour. Is, for example, telling a joke about a bald/short/fat/skinny/tall person more or less offensive than telling one about a foreigner/black person/Jew/Muslim etc even if the joke is "harmless" and just pandering to stereo-types? I am genuinely interested to know where acceptabilty ends and offence starts.

I find this whole "racist/offensive" thing a bit puzzling. Is calling somebody shorty or baldy or fatty or bean-pole or four - eyes etc offensive? Where is the line drawn? If it is illegal to make racist remarks, should it also be illegal to make "personal" remarks as well? Where should the line be drawn? Was the money and police time spent on trying to find the Spurs fans who taunted Sol Campell during a game well spent? I am not being right wing or controversial, I am genuinely puzzled by these issues.

Came across this in a drawer this morning. I think that I got it from the old forum. Still makes me chuckle:- "A major earthquake measuring 5.8 on the Richter Scale hit Portsmouth in the early hours of 14th May 2003. Epicentre - Fratton Park, Portsmouth. Victims were seen wandering around aimlessly muttering "Mentil moosh" and other sounds that nobody could understand. The earthquake decimated the area causing approximately £30 worth of damage. The "football" stadium is no longer standing. Three areas of historic burnt out cars were disturbed. Many locals were woken well before their giro arrived. The Portsmouth News has reported that hundreds of residents were "confused and bewildered", still trying to come to terms with the fact that something "interesting" had happened in the area. One resident - Tracy Sharon Smith, a 15 year old mother of five said, "It was such a shock, my little Chardonnay Mercedes came running into my bedroom crying. My youngest two, Tyler-Morgan and Megan-Storm slept through it all - but I had only given `em a couple of Valium an hour before- so it was understandable weren`t it Moosh?" Apparently though, looting, muggings and car crime did carry on as normal. The British Red Cross has so far managed to ship 4,000 crates of Sunny Delght to the area to help the vitamin starved locals. Rescue workers were still searching through the rubble and have found large quantities of personal belongings, which include benefit books, jewellery from Elizabeth Duke at Argos and bone china from Poundland. HOW CAN YOU HELP?? This appeal is to raise money for food and clothing parcels for those unfortunate to be caught up in this disaster. Clothing is most sought after, the most needed includes:- Fila or Burberry baseball caps. Kappa tracksuit tops (his and hers). Rockport polo shirts or if possible, anything by Hackett will suffice. Shell suits (female) White sports socks. Rockport boots and any other items usually sold in Primark. Those who are feeling especially generous could hopefully include any Creole earings, chains with clowns on the end and any chunkey gold rings they may have stopped wearing when they turned 15...! Food parcels may be harder to come by, but are needed all the same. Required foodstuffs include:- ASDA 98p Microwave meals. Tins of baked beans. Cans of Colt 45. Special Brew or bottles of Lambrini. Remember, 22p buys a Biro for filling in compensation forms, £2 buys chips,crisps and blue fizzy drinks for a family of 9. £5 will pay for a packet of B&H and a lighter to calm the nerves of those affected. Please do not send tents for shelter, as the sight of posh housing is unfair on the population of neighbouring areas. Thank You The Red & White Army Charity Trust (The Seeker of Justice and Truth) Anyone on here admit to composing this??

I agree. Despite the track being very dusty (and a strange colour!!) there was some very good racing on Saturday. The very long straights and tight bends also made it interesting. I really hope that Crump wins the title. I have a lot of admiration for him. He is a very determined character and a real racer. Sajfudinov also looks an exciting prospect though. Not sure where the next British challenge will come from! Scott Nicholls really is a spent force and "Bomber" despite his win in Cardiff a couple of years ago, doesn`t seem to be able to make the step up to be a really consistant performer in the GP`s. Looking forward to possibly seeing Chris Holder next year though. I think that he could be another Jason Crump.

Radio Solent saying this morning that Thomas could be bck for tonights game.