Ivan Katalinic's 'tache

I'm going to offer myself to Saints as a cost saving. I'm overweight (bye Artur), I'll probably drop the ball or make a game changing mistake during the game (bye Gazza) and I'll probably be beaten at my near post and won't reach shots in the corners (bye Kelv). I'm hoping we can use the money saved to improve the catering.

Warm welcome definitely (except maybe from Nicola?). Gave me my 1st chance to see us win at Wembley (only 2 when we won the FA Cup) and signed Lambo, which has proved an inspired acquisition. Haven't heard him say anything negative about the club despite the way he left either.

Things have improved markedly since NA's supposed showdown meeting with NC. Makes me wonder whether, if there was any interference, that NA asked to be judged on his own merits, which his achievements to date deserved.

Given my attempt at a light hearted post failed earlier and, indeed, the thread has seemingly disappeared, it made me wonder whether we need to introduce a supporters training programme as the club are doing on the pitch running throughout the various age levels to ensure parity of thought in the future. Obviously my puerile attempt offended some so here's your chance to pick your fave characteristics from your other forum chums to use as the template.

I remember Keegan's overhead kick which was ruled out because David Armstrong was supposedly offside.

Rupert Lowe would be turning in his grave (if he was dead). Football without top class food? Disgraceful.

Damn you optimism. Your presence near me is no longer required.

Paul Watts, the club photographer has tweeted about waiting for the subject of a late night photo shoot to arrive. Are we expecting the arrival of a free agent signing or is he starting his own sideline...?

Which was the problem last time we were in the Prem. Only those not getting games elsewhere like Quashie, Davenport or Redkanpp or mercenaries like Camara were interested. Brings neither quality nor team spirit. That said, Michael Dawson could buck that trend & Frimpong could be a rough diamond.

A fully fit & focused Boruc is clearly our best option. Only way to get him fully fit is by playing games & that may mean he's not at full sharpness from the off. Give him a proper run & keep any missile-like objects away from him & I feel sure he'll come good.

When Leandre Griffit scored that goal against Blackburn I thought he'd go on and be pretty special. Ronnie Ekelund was another. So much talent wasted over a disagreement about a back injury. Would've loved to have seen just how good him & Tiss could've been for us.

Talented centre back who has left Middlesbrough after recovering from a bad injury. Contract expired in June but couldn't agree a new one so could sign for a Prem side. Could do worse in the short term as he is decent when fit and was their captain.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/20237630 Interesting article on the Beeb. Of particular note is where they say Cortese is close to NA as he "trusts him and likes him". Contradicts a lot of what is said on here although there's no mention the warmth is reciprocated by NA...

I guess we'd be setting a new record: the first team to be too s**t to finish a season.

Season ticket holders may feel they've overpaid a little...

Fonte's missus gets around, doesn't she?

Nigel, you need to tell Nicola not us. HTH.

Ha ha! You mean Kent, right?

"I really think we will win this one Daddy" my 6 year old said at bedtime. What do I tell him after that one, Nige?

Crap stuff from an XI who showed, as a unit, that they aren't good enough to be Championship understudies. Throwing together an XI and expecting them to get a win at a reasonable outfit like Leeds was ridiculous. Club should reimburse those who went (but won't) & I will say sorry to my 6 year old who said that was a rubbish XI before the game & I said they'd do ok. Youthful realism triumphing over ageing optimism!

The club continually telling us how Premier League they are, with prices to match, but without the appropriate football content to back it up.

Apparently Guly lobbed the bottle at the Chapel, not Boruc, trying to cut himself some slack.

So Artur Boruc gently lobs a bottle & we boo him yet Lee Barnard was accused of smashing a bottle in someone's face & we cheer him & sing a song about it. The problem here is clear. Boruc did not throw the bottle hard enough.

Defo Budgie but Mark Dennis clearly had 'issues' too.