Whitey Grandad

And the streets outside would be full of Saints fans regardless.

Me too. In exchange for an early resolution and a fine paid whilst we're still in the EFL.

It's a neutral holding statement.

"No longer works for us" Since last Thursday afternoon or since sometime a couple of weeks ago?

Indeed. Plausible denial is very important.

But if you describe him as a "university student" on a part-time work placement?

If you examine our statement it is pretty anodyne. No admission of guilt.

Long experience has taught me that no report in the press is anywhere close to the truth. On a local topic I was once called by the local paper for my comments and my words were, "Well, it doesn't help" The banner headline that week quoted me as saying, "NAIL IN THE COFFIN!" At the research labs where I used to work we had copies of all the major newspapers and there was once an incident about which I had detailed knowledge. They all covered the incident but from different angles. None of them got it right.

And that's the problem with unsubstantiated allegations such as these. There has been a lot of jumping to conclusions and assumptions of guilt. Some chap is spotted standing on a hill, some say hiding in bushes, some say with professional eavesdropping and spying equipment, some say with a phone and earphones. This chap refuses to give his name or say what he is doing there, as he us entitled to do. Somehow the assumption is that he must be acting for Southampton FC, probably even an employee. And erm... that's it.

I have read all sorts of things. Misidentification is a common comment. Pictures on a website are rarely up to date and photos from a couple of days ago seem to have been of another individual. CCTV is not the sharpest tool in the box. There are some comments that he went into the toilets, changed his appearance somehow and was never seen again. All somewhat circumstantial and unsubstantial. The analyst intern that you may be thinking of has stopped working for Saints. The question is when.

I assume that's a rhetorical question. If they did, the world would know by now.

Not you too! He has not been identified.

But just think how bad it could have been without all that nonsense.

Clean sheet for Wood.

So you think the allegations are true? Nobody even knows who this spy is supposed to be. If he exists.

Used to be. Not now.

I hope we've paid him enough 😉

Or walk around Trafalgar Square for five minutes waving his phone in the air. Then resetting it remotely as soon as it's stolen. Or get a mate to steal it from you.

Or breach of privacy?

Has the individual been positively identified yet?

The phone call could have gone like this: "Hi Southampton FC. It's Will. Will Salt. Don't you remember me? I used to analyse the opposition teams for you. Anyway, I'm standing on this grassy knoll and I can see Middlesbrough training. Is there anything about it that you'd be interested in?" "What do you mean it's less than 72 hours to the next game? Oh shit! I thought it was Wednesday. Bloody Bank Holidays." "OK. Sorry to bother you. I must run and get changed now. Some people are after me"

If he was no longer employed then he was "on his own".

The rules apply to club employees only. Anyone else is free to observe their proceedings if they're visible from a public space. I believe this golf course is "open to the public" whatever that implies. In the 1960s we used to live in North Enfield and my dad would often go to Cheshunt to watch Spurs training sessions. They were open then.

Nobody's going to change it for you.

That's my take on it. We would normally have 14 days to respond. I cannot see how that can be reduced without our agreement, tacit or otherwise.