Dog

Pancake tosser ? It was a joke you serious person.

And your point is ? The first thread was for selling whole carp. Now they are selling carp steaks, which is ****ing minging. Pancake you tosser!!

Where do all the stars go during the day ?

TO VIEW EVERY PART OF THE MICHAEL ANGELO'S MASTERPIECE JUST CLICK AND DRAG YOUR ARROW IN THE DIRECTION YOU WISH TO SEE. In the low left, click on the plus (+) to move closer, on the minus (-) to move away. Choir is thrown in for free. Hold down the left clicker on your mouse to rotate the picture. AMAZING. MOVE THE ARROW AND YOU WILL SEE EVERY PART OF THE CHAPEL. This virtual tour of the Sistine Chapel is incredible. Apparently done by Villanova at the request of the Vatican , but thought you would enjoy the quality and a bit of Rome on your computer. Amazing what can be done with technology. http://www.vatican.va/various/cappelle/sistina_vr/index.html

OK ladies & gentlemen, the time is coming up for a sloe picking session. We need a hard frost first to liven them up then it's red nose day for the next six months. Does anyone else make this amazing drink? Receipe: Sloes are the fruit of the blackthorn tree and are a great fruit to pick in the autumn. One of the last fruits to remain on the trees before winter, they allow the forager plenty of opportunity to harvest. What to look for The blackthorn (named for its thorny dark skin and bark) is covered in white flowers in early spring. It's great if you can identify it at this stage so that you can be ready to keep an eye on the ripening fruit in the autumn! It is often the first tree to flower, and can grow up to 12 feet tall. Its fruit, the sloe, looks like a small damson. The dark purple berries have a similar dusty complexion. Where to look The blackthorn is found throughout Britain in hedges, parkland, woods, verges and scrubland. City dwellers are not precluded from enjoying the sloe forage! When to go After the first frost! The Sloe berry is not a pleasant tasting fruit, as it is very bitter indeed. After the first frost the fruit is ripe and its bitterness reduces slightly. The fruit is generally good for picking between September and early November, but harvest time is weather dependant. Top tips Gloves! Whilst the fruit can be picked without too much *****ling, the gloves will help avoid 'foragers finger'. Storage Pick over the fruit and discard any that have holes in (they are being eaten from within!) or that are past their best - they get a bit wrinkly. They do really well frozen and will last a few months. Recipes for sloe gin or vodka ask for each sloe to be *****ed with a pin. Frankly this is an unnecessary labour. A night in the freezer has the same effect, splitting the skin. Sloe gin or vodka is a wonderful Christmas drink and it could be argued that any other use of the mighty sloe is a sin. Even if you don't like gin, it is worth making as it tastes more like a liqueur, as you can make it as sweet as you like. sloe gin For every pound of fruit add 8oz of sugar and a pint or so of gin or vodka (don't worry too much about the proportions as you can add more sugar or spirit later). Leave it until Christmas, shaking the bottle every couple of days. After a few months (the longer the better, although it tends never lasts long enough to test this theory!) strain off the sloes and bottle the gin. The sloes can be stoned and made into wonderful liquor chocolates. Sloes also make a lovely tart jelly to go with game or with your Christmas dinner as an alternative to cranberry. They can also be used in autumn pudding or jam, but do need quite a bit of sugar due to their bitterness.

OK Mods, please lock this thread. All dogs have been destroyed humanely and disposed of in the correct wheeliebin before anyone asks.

Mecca? I doubt he'd have a problem with that. Have you made your feelings known to him, I suggest you do this before making a complete tit of yourself next time you are soaping up in the gym showers. Or is it too late?

It's ok, it was a Flymo. It's a lot less bovver with a hovver!!

Don't hold back! What is your honest opinion of him?

Lawnmowered unfortunatly.

Only two left now. The puppy on the left has departed.

OK, I have 3 labrador puppies left over from the litter. And I need to get rid of them before 9:00pm tonight. I cant give them away because no one wants them. Do I drown them in the bath Huntley style. Do I shoot them in the head or do I just slit their throats with a carrier bag over their heads. Your ideas are greatly appreciated...

I take a sh!t every hour on the hour, and urinate first thing in the morning and last thing before I go to bed.

Thief

NSFW http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IzOol-TBDBE

FFS! Who do you think you are Dr Who or something?

"Sniff this Jimmy, it may smell like chloroform, but I can assure you it's Old Spice"

Tell him you have 6 weeks to live, and you'll get your McMillan nurse to send a cheque.

We've all seen the Ken Block in his Subaru driving around the airfield, but this is something else, enjoy. http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=6fb_1284747894 Full Screen. 06:05

Vagina Bubbles from Hell 8/10 Here's a little clip for you.

To be honest, he is the best Pope ever, with him being a former Nazi & that German dialect of his. But he's still a dirty ****!

I was hanging out the back of her mum, when she came into the ladies toilets for a wazz. The rest is history.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1312559/Who-Wants-To-Be-A-Millionaire-cheat-Charles-Ingram-slices-3-toes.html