the stain

Looking less and less likely that Flintoff will play... http://www.guardian.co.uk/sport/2009/aug/06/andrew-flintoff-fitness-ashes-test-headingley ... which I suppose means it'll be Harmison. Got to say that sits uncomfortably with me. I'd be more inclined to pick Sidey-B or even [whisper]Hoggard[/whisper] at Headingley. Not only because their better suited to that wicket, but also because when they're good they're just as good as Harmy. But when they're bad they're not the very worst bowler you've ever seen. If I was an Aussie batsman, I'd be hoping for Harmison because, unless he's on it from the first ball there's every chance of destroying him as a bowler and as a human being before the end of the first over.

Terribly sad news. RIP

Probably no play till after tea, if not tomorrow. On the plus side, did anyone hear boycott vs hayden on TMS? I really thought they were going to come to blows!

I know mate, I was being slightly facetious with the comparison. I do however think that Bell's confidence as a test batsman (and to some extent his colleagues' confidence in him) is shot and his technique found wanting. I'm not sure that the 'going back and doing it for your county' cure will have worked. He'll still be fragile and flat-footed. I'd personally like to see Key given another chance as I think he has the temperament, but it's unlikely to happen.

Unlike Bell who lost all his confidence after scoring nothing and is somehow back in the fold..? We don't need too much tinkering with this team. If the Aussies want to fiddle that's fine, just shows they're nervous. We definitely shouldn't start changing the bowling line-up after demolishing them last time, however good Harmison's uncannily timed form is. If Bell must play, please not at 3 and please not immediately after Bopara. I'm still hopeful that Bopara will come good in this series, and all it will take is one innings. But if he screws up in the first innings and Bell walks to the crease, that's got 'batting collapse' written all over it. Get at least Colly and preferably Prior too between them in the order.

Orphans - mid-90s Scottish black comedy. Not one I'd heard of before but turned out to be a treat. A group of siblings whose mother has died, and how they prepare themselves for her funeral. Angry Scots beating each other up, plotting murder and violently grieving. Pulls a very neat trick by being both ludicrous and frightening, but still quite touchingly real. The Stain's top recommendation 9.5/10

On the contrary, it's his tendency to fall back on the same old talking reasonably like your buddy then SUDDENLY SHOUTING routine that he used in Scarface that kept him typecast for years.

Kabluey - "Off-beat" "quirky" comedy. Actually quite funny. In places. It's got a man in a funny blue suit in it. The time spent watching was not wasted. 6.5/10

It's called a 'rubber'.

I actually have the biggest penis. As such I get to decide what is and is not a sport. Having the biggest penis is the greatest sport, and I have reached the pinnacle. My masive penis is the Greatest Sporting Achievement and I am the Greatest Sportsman. :smt065

There's only ever going to be one winner to this. SWF's own John Nada, in They Live

I'll hold my hands up as one of the people who questioned Flintoff going straight back into the team. But that was mainly with an eye on his long-term fitness. His retirement announcement puts a different light on that. If he wants to play so hard he ruins his future test career, well that no longer matters. As for Bell, he's got a decent average still. But with the notable exception of vs SA at Lords last year, he's been poor for a couple of years. Put anywhere above number 5 and he gets that nervous, trapped in the headlights look about him. As I said above, if they want to bring him in that far down the order it might just work, but he's still a man with a history of cracking under pressure. If the Lions really is a credible springboard to the first XI then either Denly or Moore ought to get a shot. Agree about Wright though, he's a limited overs man.

I agree with all of that Mr Lungs. One of Moore, Carberry or Dinlo. The 'not time to experiment' dictum falls on its anus if the other option is to bring in a man who has comprehensively failed over an extended show of faith. Basically, please not Bell. But if it has to be Bell (and we all know it will be), shift Colly up to 4 to add some confidence if Bopara's nerves get the better of him again, and get Bell in nearer the middle of the order. That way there's no pressure on him and that's also where he's experienced what limited success he's had playing for England.

And yes, talking heads are fitted with wheels as standard, before anyone reports me to the Eye.

Or just time to accept that every club probably feels the same about whichever unqualified but available talking head gets wheeled out to represent them on the telly?

It's about a quote attributed to Nick Illingsworth being used in the Colemanballs section of satirical periodical, Private Eye. Or were you asking if others weren't too sure..?

We spent more than we could afford to spend. That is overspending.

Well I didn't find either very practical. Which did you prefer?

How would that work? Would you try doing whilst facing away from each other? Or would you feed it down the other's jap's eye?

It's always tragic to see a football career get in the way of a promising young alcoholic.

Well ideally you'd want KP at 3. But apparently he's bigger than the team and can refuse to play there.

Contrary bugger.

Totally agree, there are several options out there for what is really the only England place open to question when everyone's fit. But the place is only open to question at the moment because Bopara hasn't played enough tests yet to establish which was the blip, his excellent play against the Windies or his shakey start against the Aussies.

IMO you've got to give Bopara at least one more go. He's a quality batsman and his confidence has been knocked a bit; he may well come good. With Pietersen looking like he might not play the next game, it's not the moment for wholesale changes at the top of the order but for showing a bit of faith in the players already chosen (who have just won handsomely as a team). I certainly wouldn't advise calling up Bell again. A few moments reflection will call to mind just how many opportunities to impress he has spaffed up the pavillion steps. He always was a cracking County player and hopefully his re-emergence as just that won't dupe the selectors into promoting him above his capability again.

But can't differentiate between 'fair' and 'fare'.