Master Bates

Michael Jackson has reportedly become a Muslim and changed his name to Mikaeel. The singer, who was raised as a Jehovah's Witness, converted to Islam in a ceremony at a friend's house in Los Angeles. He is said to have sat on the floor and worn a small hat while an imam officiated. http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/celebritynews/3494296/Michael-Jackson-converts-to-Islam-and-changes-name-to-Mikaeel.html

Don't believe you.

Saints finance director Dave Jones has warned that further player sales and budget cuts will have to follow as the board try to ensure the club remains “sustainable.” http://m6live.dailyecho.co.uk/sport/saints/news/3871462.Player_sales_and_budget_cuts_to_continue_at_Saints/

We have a £6.4m overdraft.

Mmm..... wonder if Gaydamak would accept a drawing of a spider http://saintsweb.co.uk/forum/showthread.php?t=5395

Can I dump this link here, Buy skates for £1 http://saintsweb.co.uk/forum/showthread.php?p=114969#post114969

That's right, you can own your rivals club for just £1. PORTSMOUTH owner Alexandre Gaydamak is so desperate to offload the cash-strapped south coast club he is offering to sell his shares — for a POUND. Gaydamak has instructed his solicitors to tout the FA Cup holders to venture capitalists in the City after failing to find a buyer through the usual channels. http://www.newsoftheworld.co.uk/sport/81810/JUST-ONE-POUND-BUYS-POMPEY.html

He has hair?

2 pens according to Solent, handball and the foul.

He's not short so it's not R2D2.

The bald guy next to Poortvliet in the technical area?

No, that was W00T/WOOT!

*EDIT Yeah, as above.

If unlucky then once, anytime between 12:30am - 4am.

Tonight: Pig n Whistle, Shirley Saturday & Sunday I'll be staying in the warm, only time I'll be going out is to get the morning papers, the wine, some weed and to take the dog out.

Yeah i'll have a pm cheers, the sender can have the lovely bewbs i've just found.

At least he got ahead in life, more than what I can say for some on here.

Gash if true, f*cking donkey raping 5hit eaters!

ARIES You tend to be headstrong and deliberate in your actions. Basically you don't give a f*ck about anyone. Most people hate you but you couldn't care less. You're the type of person who would masturbate at a wedding. TAURUS Warm and caring are your most endearing characteristics. You get on well with most people because you're bisexual. You hardly ever wear underwear and you constantly smell of pi5s. GEMINI Your star sign denotes an air of duality in your character. Simply, you're a neurotic schizophrenic. A real f*cking weirdo, the type of person who'd kill themself to win a bet. CANCER You have a businesslike attitude to life and a knack for making money. You're an unscrupulous b@stard who would sell relative's limbs to buy a mobile phone. You are likely to be murdered. LEO The adventurous type, always looking for thrills and willing to try anything. In other words, stupid. You have the IQ of a garden snail and will never amount to anything. Most Leos are living on the welfare. VIRGO You like the good things in life and you know how to enjoy them. But you're prone to bullshi*ting and you're a cheap b@stard. Virgo men are usually gay and the majority of Virgo women are whores. LIBRA You are the forgiving type and you don't bear grudges. This makes you an a5shole. For your entire life people will make a complete pr*ck out of you. Nobody will go to your funeral. SCORPIO You are sharp, a quick thinker and good at puzzles. However these are your only good traits. You screw small animals and love picking your nose. You always have snot on your clothes. SAGITTARIUS You are the romantic type, soft-hearted and a lover of the arts. You are likely to import Dutch pornography and sex toys. You thrive on incest. CAPRICORN You are deep and personal in your thoughts, the quiet type. A mean self-centred c*nt and a closet homosexual. Your best friend is probably an altar boy. AQUARIUS You are the academic type and will probably end up working in the legal system. This means you are an absolute pervert, at the least a transvestite. Your ideal sexual partner is a Labrador puppy wearing fishnet tights. PISCES You are the eternal optimist, seeing the best of any situation. You have no grasp of reality and live in a dream world. Most people consider you to be the greatest living moron. You will continually fail. You're a pr*ck.

No way is he South'ner. Are you? I've seen a pic of South'ner, can't be.

On a misty mountaintop on the Indonesian island of Sulawesi, scientists for the first time in more than eight decades have observed a living pygmy tarsier, one of the planet's smallest and rarest primates. Full Story

Here is a tip for you. Get that new Lynx deodourant with a touch of Chocolate, spray it on your d*ck and go stand outside the local school. Works a bloody treat. ___________________ Have you ever noticed that it's only 'perfect' people who are murdered or killed in horrific accidents? "He was the perfect son" or "She was the perfect daughter." "Such a tragic accident they were the perfect family." "They died together,the perfect couple till the end." Makes me glad I abuse my kids and beat up my wife. Kind of makes me immortal.

If I did, I would have killed off Euell's red card

We lost Saints have had their appeal against Jason Euell's red card turned down, meaning that his three match ban will stand.