Secret Site Agent

I had one about three weeks ago and for the entertainment of my daughter, I pretended to be deaf and daft. Him: Hello, my name is David. Me: Sorry, no David here. Him: No my name is David. Me: Whats that about DVD's Him: NO, my name is David. Me: (this is for those born in the 70's) And I'm Ian. And I wanna go straight, I wanna go straight, I'm sick and tired of taking up drugs and staying up late. Hahahaha, come on David, sing with me. Hello? Hello? Him: Who is your current energy provider? Me: Currency provider? I ususally go to the post office and change it there, but I haven't had a holiday in years. Him: Do you have any pets. Me: Pests? No no pests here. I had some ants once, but I think they came in from outside. Him: Can i interest you in any offers? Me: Offices? Why would I want to buy any offices. I can bearly avoid my mortgage as it is. Him: Who do you bank with? Me: Johnny Dankworth? Wasn't he married to Cleo Lane. Him: No, whose you bank. Me: Oh, sorry. Hows my back? Not too bad considering, still get a bit of a twinge.

Mine is Orange Broadband. I was originally with Tiskali, then Wanadoo, then Orange bought them out. First the broadband was slow, them stopped working. Rung and rung the Indian call centre and told no problem on the line. TGalked to BT and there was an issue, which BT sorted. Then had BBand for 6 weeks at 0.5 meg, then nothing. Samething with Indian call centre, reading from the script. Then asked for supervisors etc. NOTHING. Found a site with number for UK call centre, finally got to talk to someone with some sense, but no joy. BUT got back two month fees. Then told the problem may be the router, so sent a new router. Nothing Moaned again and got another month back. Got through to an escalation team, told me they were sending a better router, but had to upgrade my service. Sent me the paperwork, and I changed it to read, ' If Orange are unable to give uninterupted broadband service for 7 days, then this contract is null and void. Paid 11 quid tol get it notorised by Solicitor, and sent it of. Got new router, worked for free days, then nothing. Phoned up to cancel, told I couldn't, told them i could, told me I was signed up for 18 months, told them the contract I sent back was that it was on the basis of 7 days uninterupted. Told me I couldn't change it, told them I could, the woman really argued with me, and I asked to speak to a supervisor, which she said I couldn't. I asked for her name, and she said they weren't allowed to give it out, and if I didn't pay, she would county court me. So I hung up, redialed, spokie to someone else, who put me through to a supervisor, who not only told me the name of the woman I was just speaking to, went ovber and chastised her, then arranged for me to come out of my contract. I then went with BE broadband. But, it doesn't end there. A month after being with BE, orange takes a payment. I phone them up, get my money back. Next month Orange take another payment. I call the bank and cancel the direct debit. Phone Orange to get my money back. They say they can't as I Have cancelled the direct debit. I tell them I don't trust them to not take any money, so they arrange to send me a cheque, which duly arrives. Three months after leaving them, get a letter for non payment. Nothing month four or five. Month six, get a letter threatening court action over non payment of six month broadband. I rang them up and asked to be taken to County Court. I was offered easy payment terms, an offer of stopping proceedings and a warning that it would effect my credit rating and would be in the hands of debt collectors. I told them that I don't care, as BE Broadband had been supplying me with Broadband for six months, and we willing to give this evidence in court. They dropped the matter and sent a letter apologising. Then sent a letter the following month threatening court action. So I e-mailed the lot over, sent it in the registered mail, got a solicitor from Which magazine involved, BE publicity department sent an e-mail saying that they are happy to assist as they want to use it for PR purposes and I finally recieved another apology and a cheque for £60.00. It's been three years now, and I still expect them to want to take me to court.

You know, you can always vote with your feet and if NO-ONE uses Collesium, and only use Avensis & Princess, then they will be back in the frame, will be able to charge MUCH more money on the deal, and the price of season tickets, shirts etc. will go up. This is capitalism. You go out to tender, you may have a prefered bidder in mind, but if the other bloke can do it cheaper, you have to go with him. And as for keeping in with the local community, if NC came on here and said the official coach company was Avensis & Princess, but to subsidise the deal he would ahve to put £10.00 on all tickets, this thread would still exist, but would be about ripping off the fans, (and in Schrodingers universe, it probably does, and Pompey have paid all their debts, Saggy Chops regularly gives to Charity and is spearheading a campaign against corruption, the Green party are in power and Nick Illingsworth has a season ticket).

You know, you can always vote with your feet and if NO-ONE uses Collesium, and only use Avensis & Princess, then they will be back in the frame, will be able to charge MUCH more money on the deal, and the price of season tickets, shirts etc. will go up. This is capitalism. You go out to tender, you may have a prefered bidder in mind, but if the other bloke can do it cheaper, you have to go with him. And as for keeping in with the local community, if NC came on here and said the official coach company was Avensis & Princess, but to subsidise the deal he would ahve to put £10.00 on all tickets, this thread would still exist, but would be about ripping off the fans, (and in Schrodingers universe, it probably does, and Pompey have paid all their debts, Saggy Chops regularly gives to Charity and is spearheading a campaign against corruption, the Green party are in power and Nick Illingsworth has a season ticket).

I don't agree. I use Retarded every day, such as 'Retarded Binder' where the black tarmac stuff is stopped from fully going off by the addition of a solvent, or Concrete Retarder.

Oh, ****, I say that one. Going to be practicing removing it fro m my vocabulary. And I'm probably one of the funniest people you'll ever meet.

I agree with the former,( and it not just people of black origin) when they say 'Know what I mean' I interupt and say, 'No please explain further.' And also when they say, 'You Know?' and I answer, 'No I don't' My worst hate is the word 'Innit'. I carried out a few interviews a few months back, just for apprentices so they were 16 or 17. A large numebr kept saying it over and over again. Grrrrrrrr. And also when they don't even bother saying 'Oh my God,' But actually say OMG. 'Weren't they a band in the 80's?' I respond. At that, all text speak. LOL, OMG, ROFL.

As the great Lord Suger put it, 'It's bloody,bloody nuts!!! and it wouldn't be allowed anywhere else in football'. It makes me wonder, not just why they are fighting to keep Pompey alive, but why they treat other teams differently. It's ****ing cloud cookoo land, and not only stinks to high heaven, I expect Oliver Stone to make a thriller about it.

YEP. better spend 300-400 million on a new team. No benfits to what we saw, they are all crp.Come on. Decent performance from us I thought. First 20 mins crap because we were star struck, but managed to improve, which bodes well for us to adapt to teams getting better of us. Ward- Prowse and lallana played very well, Adam my MOM, and i think Guly could have a future as a midfielder for us. Shame boys couldn't put one or two away. I liuked the way we moved the ball in the second half. I just want mid table survival this season and build for the next. but who knows.

Wow, what great times. My memory of being in the Army is of fearing that I may die at any minute buy sniper , worrying that I may not wake up due to stray shelling, being scared the aircraft coming over the hill may be be an enemy, or a friendly that mistakenly attacks us, or I may never see my family again. Or worrying that the men under my command might not live to see another day. But nothing like you experienced. My Hero.

that's all we need on a Saturday, cries of 'scummarmi, scummarmi' and the opposing fans going, 'Eh? What the eff is a scummarmi? Is it some sort of desease? Is it an old Hogmans curse? Or is it the new Southampton Tongalease centre back, Arnold Scummarmi?' We are Saints, we reserve the right to call ourselves any self-deprecating name we want!!!!

I aint got none, no way. Goody two shoes, me, (or I load the gun for others to fire)

Unfortunatly this is the way in Construction sometimes - It's called Early Contractor Involvement. I doubt Mowlem were on a design and build though. It's a well known fact that Barr bought the job and didn't do the best of jobs, especially as far as I'm concerned. In this day and age I reckon the cost would be around 66 million still. Although the cost of steel and materials has gone through the roof, labour costs are down are so are margins, with companies cutting each others throats at the moment. I'd still do it for cost, plus a life long season ticket and touching rights to Lucy Pinder. The

Hmmm. I did a cost comparison on it a couple of years ago. I'm on holiday at the mement but when I'm back to work i'll see if I can find it then apply a couple of growth figures. Hopefully indexing will give a close value.

Umm, sounds a lot like me. Get well soon, we're thinking of you.

Yes I've returned to the board to catch up and I see it's gone slightly off track. It's not the plastics or the JCL, it's those that have come out of the woodwork he claim they have ALWAYS been following the team, when you knwo full well they have'nt and want to air brush out history, where you know full well that they weren't around during the wildeness days, but they claim they were.

Harry Redknapp had mixed feelings about leaving Spurs. He was disappointed that he had to leave but on the other hand he had put 100k on Harry Redknapp leaving Spurs at 20/1

Harry Redknapp must be the first manager in history to have buckled under the pressure of the England job without actually having it.

I have done it three times, I have done three rapes, three assaults, a theft by finding, a shop lifting and a fraud. Mostly a couple of days and one collapsed on day three. A lot of waiting around and being sent home, and even when sitting as soon as you hear the words, 'Point of Law' you're out and back, and out and back. As mentioned above, sometimes it is difficult to get 12 people to agree, but sometimes it's a bang-to-rights 'guilty' and sometimes a straight forward 'not guilty'. It can be a lot of pressure as this is someone's life you are dealing with, but don't be afraid to ask a question if you don't undersatnd anyhting. And take soem form of portable entertainment, as you will spend a lot of time hanging around.

Done and done.

I've just had a look at the Echo site, and the headline is ' Criticism for Saints over tickets for visually impaired fans.' It's only just been anounced, when did anyone get a chance to critisise? They must have just rung any old contact, (John Cunningham, a voluntary worker with the charity Open Sight) just for a quote, and even he isn't too critical. And does John Cunningham speak for Open Sight? Just another chance for the Echo to have a go. I personally would like to think we could give them something back in the form of a reduced ticket, after all they do get a concession on the TV licence and at the Cinema, (i don't know if this is nationally, but i do know of some that do with 'verbal discriptions' on). But the questions shouldn't be that Saints should do it when others arn't it should be a requirement of the Premier League that forces all teams to do it.

My Go Now. Norwich can't afford it...... Holt ......blah blah blah No Manager....rubarb rubarb Transfer fee.......do-be-do Laugh out loud..........hmm hmm hmm Source.........dedededed

Right, listen here friend, you're just one of these people who don't even bother to really read what it's all about, just jump in at the bottom post and read from there. Who the fu{k is going on about people being great saints fans? The point I'm trying to make is that WHY when your team is not in the top flight SUPPORT SOMEONE ELSE WHO IS? isn't part of football about enjoying the team you've got a personal attachment to succeeding, and feeling low when they fail, but having a hope in your heart that things will get better? It's about loyalty, it's about making a choice and sticking to it, it's about being proud to stand tall and say I support team 'X' no matter what league they are in? If you want to start following Saints, fine, but not because they are a premiership team, but because you follow saints. And don't take that loyalty away to someone else if we get relegated, just so you can support a team in the premiership? What next, 'I support England, but if they get knocked out, i've always been a spain/brazil/germany fan.' These people have no loyalty and that annoys me. They change allegiences at the drop of a hat. I personnaly don't like that. And it's not just them starting to support again, it's the re-writing of history when they tell you they were always a saints fan. If she ever gets her ugly Millbrook face on TV again, I'll bet Fiona Phillips is a Saints fan again. She became a Chelsea fan when we got relegated, and always was a Chelsea fan, as it was 'unfashionable' in TV Land to support a second division team, and it's this that pees me off. I don't mind people becoming involved again, I don't mind people choosing to support again, I don't mind if people never went to games and are going to them now. I don't even mind people who have become enamoured with Saints and feel the urge to change allegiences , ( hypocritical I know) because we are a plucky little club, but are happy to let people know they have changed. One of the actual Saints fans I work with used to be a Liverpool fan, but changed due to enjoying watching Matty Le Tiss and the constant 'will we wont we be relegated', the genuine fans and being local to the Dell/SMS. It's the 'I've Always been a Reading/Saints/WHU fan I have since I were a kid........(Oh wait a Minute they've been relegated)..........Yes, I ve supported Chelsea for over twenty years man and boy why I remeber when I went to see Chel.........oh been promoted....... Yes went to see Reading/Saints/WHU when they played Man Utd ............oh relegated again..........Yes Arsenal beat them that day, I'll tell you.........Wait I'm a Chelsea fan............Yes great team Chelsea, the greatest............Man City are better............Man City, the greatest team in the land, better than the rest............Chelsea beat B-Munich.........Chelsea, Chelsea,Che;lase, Chelding, REading, Aresnal Ham, Southampton Utd... err, Let me look at the paper and come back to you'. There, that's my rant over. Like they say in Exams, please read the Post before Answering.

Yes, the feller I'm talking about really ****ed me off, as we as a company have Reading Season Tickets and this feller had them when Saints Played them when we were on the decline, even though he was a Chelsea supporter, had a Chelsea season ticket and only wanted them for his daughters birthday as he couldn't take her to Stamford Bridge. The others were all chelsea/Manure/Arse, and the WHU were Arse supporters. It just annoys me really, especially on a personal level as I can't understand how you can change allegiences like that and get all excited about a team that you just choose because they are better than you local team.

Just thought about this as I attended a big meeting today. Around the table just after the meeting we were ribbing my boss, who looks like Sam Allerdice, (because I put a picture of Big Sam on a poster instaed of my boss and no body noticed) and one of my collegues was harping on about how Reading were going to succeed this year, and for a joke I said, 'I've known Steve for a long time, since he last supported Reading, and through the Chelsea years'. One of the younger lads said that 'Saints just need a few player for us to stay up, don't we!' Refering to me. And talking around the table got me thinking. 2 years ago the company had: 1 Reading Fan 2 WHU Fans 1 Saints Fan, (Me) In monthly meeting. Now we have: 8 Reading Fans 12 WHU Fans 5 Saints Fans In th monthly meeting. Changes in personel? 1 in, (a Rugby Fan) 2 out, (An Arsenal fan and a Chelsea fan) Wow, what difference a Season makes. And don't get me started on the 'Saints have always been my second team' malarky. But as a footnote, as I told all my collegues, we must feel sorry for Steve. After the additional costs of a new Reading Shirt, the taking back of the Chelsea Shirt and changing it for a Man City shirt, only to have to change it back to the Chelsea Shirt, and having to buy two tickets for the Reading V Chelsea match and having to choose who he supports in which half, and if he has to change seats if One of them score, only to have to change back if the other equalises!!!. Apparently he thinks I'm a co ck. But as I told him, I may be, but I've always just been a Saints fan.