Secret Site Agent

No, Northam road is not going to be closed. But somewhere else is going to have lane closure.

But there are two who know nothing about it. So three know full well what is going on, yet two named sources know nothing. So who is right/wrong. I respect your opinion too, but I think someone is using you to further their own ends. Personnaly I think NC is an egotistical ****, prefessionally I think he is doing a good job. And this afternoon, I made a decision at 14:47 that will effect a large number of people and will upset a few of you as you trudge home tonight, late because of the traffic.

I just spoke to Luke James, who then spoke to Nigel Craddock and niether of them know anything about this, so i don't know where it comes from. And to be honest, and no disrespect to patred, but I believe that under the current management structure, who ever told him this is full of it and is yanking his chain, as I don't believe anyone would know what NC was upto to be honest. In a nutshell, NC would not have people in a position to know what he was upto, who would tell anyone outside the club. those that claim to know would be the very people kept in the dark.

This is to each and every one of you, and it includes me, and to the thousands that suppoort Saints, both locally and around the world. When all is said and done Nicola Corteze is what YOU deserve!!!!!! He is what I DESERVE !!!!!!! Think on that.

I'm amazed at how many on this site don't get satire. Think i'll **** off to world of warcraft.

At the moment there is a very delicate situation going on between myself and the Saints Web, whilst I am loathe to comment for obvious reasons I think it’s pertinent to make sure that the facts are not distorted. 1. After the payment to post on this website was introduced, the SECRET SITE AGENT TRUST issued a statement requesting the admin to reconsider, this statement was printed in part by the Beano and also on the toilet walls in various pubs. A letter was written on the back of a Chinese menu and sent to Steve Grant, Ponty, and Exit2 requesting a meeting and received a phone call acknowledgement that this had been received and could I deliver 2 sweet and sour, 1 spare ribs Hong Kong style and some noodles. 2. The SECRET SITE AGENT TRUST received no reply from the website admins regarding the statement, the request for a meeting, the graffiti in the toilets, or my offer to tarmac their drives cheaply as I have some tarmac left over, guv’nor I can do you a good deal. 3. The SECRET SITE AGENT TRUST then received other correspondence from the website regarding other matters, the Trust complied with the website’s request to take down the ‘I Heart St. Landrew’ badge amongst other badges and patches off of its Hi-Vis site safety jacket, indeed the SECRET SITE AGENT TRUST removed the entire jacket and put on a hi-vis vest to ensure that there could be no confusion, even though it was cold and looked like it could rain at any stage. 4. Shortly after the deadline I noticed that my money had been refunded by the website back onto my Visa Debit Bank Card. I have to date received no correspondence from the website to explain this. 5. Despite repeated e-mailed requests to various members of senior managements friends, relations and work colleagues, (Including Arizonas God father,baj’s mother-in-law, The Admiral of the fleet to speak to DS Mills, MOSS from the IT Crowd to speak to Exit2, the SuperNoodleSaints group to speak to Ponty) at the website and attempts to speak to them by shouting very loud in the Northam Stand on Saturday, I again have received no reason for this happening or until yesterday anyone who would actually acknowledge my correspondence. At present I do not have a membership for the forthcoming season, this is the first time this has been the case in approximately 2 years, indeed since I first entered the SaintsFoverever, nearly 9 years ago I would hazard a guess that I have missed no more than around 20 posts from Alpinesaint and Miserable old git. I have no idea what is going on, so I cannot give a reason as to what has happened so I am loathe to comment further at present. Oh wait. I used my Barclaycard………..Oh, yes. There’s the payment. Silly me. I can post after all. Erm, sorry everyone. (This is a dramatization. May not have happened. Any relationship to anyone alive, dead, or Admin of this site is purely co-incidental and is in the tradition of satire.)

and that is what i think

Shouldn't you pass this onto Nick, oh, don't bother I am sure he has already e-mailed him about his ticket plight.

Where do you get all this from? No independant evidence, no corroboration, nothing to rein force what you are saying. And what is your agenda? What would your ultimate goal be? Do you want Lowe,(sorry Corteze) out? Do you want marcus to go? Are you xenephobic? Who should replace them? I think all this **** that Corteze did this, Corteze did that is ******s. I think I can understand why he does soemthings, and others I am stumped on. The only think we can do is trust and have faith, debate and surmise and live with any decisions that are made. Our food comes in the same size pakaging but the contents are smaller. We can all sign upto broadband that gives us upto 20 meg download speed, but in reality is lucky if it is 2 meg. All you can do is understand that this is a businessman who has a job to do and he doesn't give a flying **** about NI season ticket, or who parks where, or installment plans. That was the old regieme, this is the new. All he is lookig to do is establish us as a force to be reckoned with on the pitch, and a self-sustaining stable business with little need for outside input of cash. So that if Marcus finds 1 m quid in the back pocket of his jeans before puting them in the wash and gives it to Nicola, we don't all go 'Wehey we got a miilion to spend on (insert position here).' only to find we can only spend 1/4 of it becasue 3/4 is needed to pay the tax bill. If they ever go, at least we will not be in the same place as when they came. The only thing we can do is vote with our feet. Think of it this way. The Tories are going to cut funding to all sorts of government departments. My concern is the funding to the HA and EA as this is a big revenue stream for my company and job security for me and mine. I still voted for the Tories as I witnesses the financial stimulus money that was supposed to keep people in jobs mostly go to designers.

That goes both ways you know. including making assumptions that border on the extreme to prove your theory

Isn't that against British Employment Law?

Oh, I've got it. Nick has phoned every manager going so what must have happened is that they all think someone else is dealing with it. And no one is.

Nothing gets signed off by Cortese, nothingat all, not even the pie orders for the concourse. The staff at SMS are not running round scared of Cortese, the more informed people with contacts inside the club will know thisbut will not tell us as there is nothing to tell. he is loved and that is why there are 13 videos on Saints players with staff singing his praises. One thing I think you'll find out is that NI is the Saints fan who is used by the press and media for their own ends.

Just a question. If Nicola is such a strong tyrant, and he wanted all us lot to know he was the KING os ST MARY's and he decided, 'I'm going to kick that p*ick Illingstworth in the Nuts and teach them all a lesson', and to do this he decided he was going to send a message that anyone who bad mouths him will lose their season ticket, as a lot are saying here, WHY DO IT SECRETLY? Case in point. The Isralis decide to teach Hamas a lesson, so they send in an undercover commando team and crack the few water pipes and disappear? NO, they blow the hell out of them and let everyone know what they have done, and they ar the ones that have done it. So why sneakily get back at NI by cancelling his season ticket? Why not just ban him from the ground or go to press and make him look like a ****? I'm still of the mind that it's a case of his ego has been dented as he is now an irrelevence and he don't like it.

****, so do I. That's twice in one post. Come on, whose hacked his account?

What evidence is there that this is anything to do with Cortese? Who really thinks that Cortese really gives a **** about him in anyway shape or form?

Knock, knock! Who's there ? Nick illingsworth! Nick illingsworth who? Nick illingsworth, chairman of the saints trust!!! Still never heard of you. Now could you please form an orderly queue, mr illington, behind everyone else and stop trying to jump the queue!!!!!

There is a reason to this and it is probably not what we think. My thread of speaking to another egotistical CEO pointed out that we shouldn't try and read peoples mind. We are assuming, as NI is, that the reason he hasn't got a season ticket is becasue he has spoken out previously, based on NO EVIDENCE and the fact that he no longer has any pull in the new regieme

Wow. You really have a massive ego. This is the way I have dealt with BT,EDF,EA, HA, Virgin Media, BSKYB, The MOD, British Airways, The Royal Household, Southampton City Council, Barking and Dagenham Council, Fleet Services and Hampshire Constabulary. I mention these as I have in the past had an issue of complaint with each and every one of them, and I have followed the complaints procedure. This being in spite of the other reason I mention them is that I know 'Senior Management' in each of these organisations and HAVE NEVER rung them up to complain. This includes Ben Verwaayen, Former Head of BT, Paul Kernahan, Former Chief Constable of Hampshire, Lord Blackwell and little Nadeem at Fleet services. I never went straight to them, and never needed to. Probably because I am not that arrogant or assuming that they have nothing better to do than sort out something not in their area of responsibility, just because I am too lazy or big headed to be a normal joe. It was always sorted out, eventually. And how shocking to moral of your staff that a senior manager interferes in your job because you assume he thinks you are incapable of sorting out a single season ticket. You would be the first one to scream about this. Nick Illingsworth is just a normal joe now, like the rest of us. He needs to get used to it. him and his trust are a spent force, it seems and now the management I really believe just don't care about him or them any more.

I personnaly think his complaint would have had more legs if he had pointed out he had followed the procedure, and showed the whole club to be rotten to the core, rather than give the impression that 'I demand to speak to David Luker directly. Do you not know who I am' because to me and a lot on here, he gives that impression.

No, I speak to the grunt on the front desk. Then I go to the supervisor. I don't go winging to Dave Luker, beacuse I don't want to be embarrased and feel like a right turd when he says, '....and what did the ticket office say?' And I say, 'didn't go to them, can straight to you.' And he says 'Let me know how you get on talking to the ticket office, and if you don't get any joy, come back to me.' and he's thinking all the time 'What a pompous, arrogant 'Wa-nker'. I know, been there, done it, though the same. And they never come back to you. So there's your answer. In all honesty.

5. Despite repeated e mailed requests to various members of senior management at the club and attempts to speak to them on the phone I again have received no reason for this happening or until yesterday anyone who would actually acknowledge my correspondence. He says there, in his own words, he contacted senior management. He doesn't make claim to have contacted the ticket office. If he had done, he would have/should have said.

I totally agree and i HAVE BEEN the one to get the ****ing phone call off the 'Residents Co-ordinator', The 'Neighbourhood manager', the 'Local housing Support officer' and the 'Estate Warden'. Don't get me wrong, some of them do a good job under difficult circumstances. But some of them, wadling up into the cones after 'illigally' crossing the live carriageway, wearing their non standard hi-vis vests bought from halfords, (I'm sorry, madam, but that vest isn't a Class 3 to BS EN 471. And what a lovely hard hat you have bought from B and Q, but that isn't to BS EN 166 is it?) telling me I can't close the road, (but I have a Temporary Traffic Order, signed by the Secretary of State for Transport, Community Support Officer, and i think you are over stepping your bounds. And what, swearing is a Sec 4a Public Order Offence? No, as it is on the phone it's a crime under the telecommunications act, you fargin doughnut. ) or telling me I must be quieter when planing the road, (But I have a Section 61 proir consent exemption under the Control of Pollution act 1974. And sorry, as a barrister, why have you not heard of one before?) There is a national hotline for complaints that compel me,my team and my company to act in some way to resolve the issue. And to report back to the Highways Agency Sponsor, who reports back to the National Roads Co-Ordinator to say what action has been taken. Phoning me up directly when I am in bed asleep, in the bath, on the toilet,at my daughters birthday party, or giving Mrs Agent a seeing too (I kid you not) on my personal mobile and you wont get the same result I am afraid.

Where does it say he did? And no, I am not getting over excited. I'm getting a little concentric, to be honest. As Benjii has pointed out, he said in Item 5 he has been speaking to Senior Management. not, 'After speaking to the ticket office I got fobbed of with excuses, so I took it to the next level and had no choice but to speak to Senior Management.' His words, not mine. his ommisions speak volumes. Surely if he had spoken to the ticket office, and been fiobbed off, it would lend more credence to his complaint.

Yes. Unlike us proles, he's speaking to the great and the good in the Club, when all he has to do is speak to the ticket desk. And why isn't he getting any answer? It is probably because to the great and the good in the Club are all thinking, '........Why doesn't the stupid T wat just call the ticket office instaed of hassling me?' I'm getting offensive now.